Aunty Acid by Ged Backland for August 26, 2024

  1. Missing large
    seanfear  3 months ago

    so is my bank account

     •  Reply
  2. Large kimg0147
    Yakety Sax  3 months ago

    Annoying Levels Went From Zero To Hundred

    A customer wants to pay for a thirty euro purchase with a hundred-euro note.

    Me: “Do you have a smaller note? I’m only carrying smaller change in my till.”

    Customer: “No. It’s legal tender so you have to take it.”

    Me: “I’m not saying that, ma’am. I’m just trying to save you an awkward amount of small change.”

    I call my manager for a refill for my till, but in my experience, this doesn’t happen quickly and it isn’t on the manager’s priority list if the shop is busy.

    Customer: “Just cash me out! I’m busy!”

    Fine, a lot of change it is.

    I count in groups of five to make it easier. I’m not even at ten euro of change in various single-euro notes and smaller coins when she frantically waves her hands.

    Customer: Waving a couple of twenty euro notes in my face. “Stop, you ret**d!”

    She had it the whole time… and she used a slur.

    Me: “I’m sorry, but since I’ve already put in the amount on the computer, I can’t take your smaller notes anymore. I have to give you change on the €100 note.”

    That wasn’t true, but if you can be annoying, so can I.

     •  Reply
  3. Large kimg0147
    Yakety Sax  3 months ago

    The Prints-ciple Of Patience

    Our store has received a $700 order that’s due ASAP, for almost a hundred-fifty blueprint scans. In all the downtime I have between tasks, I keep scanning as many blueprints as I can.

    A customer requests a couple photos printed on regular paper. I refer her to the self-service machine and let her know how to get started. I also let her know we have other orders we’re working on. Barely fifteen seconds passes, and she asks out loud:

    Customer: “Ugh! Can’t anyone help me?!”

    I literally have my cashier ringing, one of my two floor guys ringing, with the other guy already assisting someone.

    Me: “Everyone is busy, ma’am, but I—”

    Before I can even mention sending someone over, she starts shouting.

    Customer: “I can’t believe how no one is available!”

    Me: “That’s retail for you, ma’am, we’re always busy at weekends.”

    Customer: As she storms out the door. “I GUESS YOU JUST LOST A CUSTOMER!”

    I won’t step over a $20 bill to pick up a nickel.

     •  Reply
  4. Avt freyjaw nurse48
    FreyjaRN Premium Member 3 months ago

    Amen!

     •  Reply
  5. Missing large
    desvarzil  3 months ago

    You’re not weird, you’re “Unique”.

     •  Reply
  6. Unnamed  1
    Doctor Toon  3 months ago

    When I was younger I was weird

    Now that I’m a senior citizen, I’m eccentric

     •  Reply
  7. Orion95
    Jml58  3 months ago

    There is no one like Me. The rest of the world rejoices.

     •  Reply
  8. Missing large
    PraiseofFolly  3 months ago

    Although Aunty Acid might have her ‘weirding ways,’ I doubt her line will eventually lead to the future Bene Gesserit order of the Empire in ‘Dune’. She is hardly a Reverend Mother (more like Irreverent) and her use of booze does not give her powers comparable to the use of Arrakis Spice. But give it 10,000 years … and who knows?

     •  Reply
  9. Pexels pixabay 278823
    Doug K  3 months ago

    … just like every other weirdo.

     •  Reply
  10. Missing large
    Calvinist1966  3 months ago

    Morecambe and Wise were Two of a Kind.

     •  Reply
  11. Army captain bars
    Captain Bars  3 months ago

    And speaking of being weird….

    www.Youtube.Com/shorts/jMdIWUsf7Fg

    www.Youtube.Com/shorts/tq4Un26r9LM

     •  Reply
  12. 250
    ladykat  3 months ago

    We are all one of a kind, Aunty.

     •  Reply
  13. Missing large
    dflak  3 months ago

    All my friends are weird. Who want’s boring friends?

     •  Reply
  14. Goblin
    owlsandy Premium Member 3 months ago

    The older I get, the weirder I feel! We’re all unique in our own ways.

     •  Reply
  15. Img 5203
    rockyridge1977  3 months ago

    Weird….one of a kind……kind weird

     •  Reply
  16. Missing large
    kathleenhicks62  3 months ago

    WHaaaat?

     •  Reply
  17. Red skelton
    Daltongang Premium Member 3 months ago

    And we thank the stars above that you are Aunty.

     •  Reply
  18. Me  2
    Silence Dogood Premium Member 3 months ago

    Nope, there’s The Cult of the Orange Loser and the Rethuglican party to welcome you! All one of a WEIRD kind!

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment

More From Aunty Acid