That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for September 12, 2024

/// Franz’s Family von Lenbach presents

a weird study in creepy suspense.

From their stares I’d have guessed

that all four are possessed;

the miasma of evil’s intense.

What a cute family!!

Charming

“Heeere’s Johnny’s family”

I believe the younger girl is named Lizzie.

Rejected Addams Family cast; too scary.

when you give your portrait business to the lowest bidder…

They assumed that since they could only afford the small portrait, they had to scrunch together.

Upon meeting the Knutsdorff family Elmer announced that he would be unable to escort Anna to the junior prom after all as he had to have his appendix taken out that night.

What if The Picture of Dorian Grey was a family portrait?

The Shtinkenaugen Family wasn’t ever invited to block parties.

Please stay. We’d LOVE to have you for dinner.

Unavailable for photo: Thing and Lurch.

When grandpa his gasses exudes/

The conclave quickly concludes:/

The blonde girl is hopin’/

That the windows soon open:/

Now can we get back to the nudes ?

I was guessing the current lineup of Fleetwood Mac.

The Lean Family, Eileen, Colleen, Jolene, and Paul Lean.

My lord, are these people(?) still alive in the world?

Did the parents stay stooped like that the whole time the artist was painting?

“Sir, after I’ve finished the portrait, I will render it as prints on calling cards. Send one to every young men that starts sniffing around, and your daughters are guaranteed to remain virgins.”

By sending out this in their Christmas card, they ensured another year of no visits from the relatives.

Come on, folks — “Chins up”.

I’m not sure what was creepier, getting the Von Lenbach’s annual Christmas letter or the enclosed copy of this picture along with it.

Photograph first, then painted

MAGA followers

Addams Family ancestral portrait?

Robert Plant was always a bit different.

Creepy is being nice!

“When WE Stare into the Abyss, the Abyss Averts Its Eyes!”

Family von Lenbach: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:1903 paintings in Germany" Wikimedia 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, and Yahoo search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found, and once there find the text string Franz, and click its link for info and links that point to more info (perhaps best viewed by the Google Chrome or Mozilla Firefox browsers, which can automatically translate most webpages if necessary) about this painting, including an audio Description. 

Again, a larger strip image is also shown by merely clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s THROWBACK THURSDAY: MASTERPIECE #2257 (8/5/19) (September 11, 2024) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment. I have added a comment there pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. So far, 2 works by him have been used here (3 times total, including this Throwback Thursday repeat), the August 5, 2019, strip being its first use (if you can’t use the earlier instructions because you use a different search engine, my comment there still has the URL of the since updated WC file pointed to by them). The December 31, 2020, strip has the other by him, so far.

“Herr Tolstoy, I Can Assure You That Happy Families Are NOT All Alike. We’re ECSTATICALLY Happy…”

“We Had To Have Our Family Portrait Painted. We Don’t Show Up On Film.”

No One Who Peaks German Could Be An Evil Man. His Wife and Daughters, On The Other Hand…

Painter: Remember – smile for the painting.

..

We are smiling!

Some comments from 08/05/2019:

Strob: “Obviously no one would ever marry me, so I created my family.”

Baslim the Beggar: The little one is by far the scariest one. You just know she is the one responsible for dismembered small animals found in the neighborhood…

Papared25: “Mommy, I want his liver…and onions on the side!”

ccomebacktour: The family that’s POSSESSED together

GoComicsGo!: “What we do as a family is our business not yours.“

epaphus8: After seeing the original cast photo for “Pretty Woman”, the movie studio executives required a few changes.

Call me Ishmael: In this household, where blonde is exotic / and everyone’s gaze is hypnotic / Mom cringes, Dad drools / and blonde Tatiana rules / in a manner that’s baldly despotic.

Call me Ishmael: “We have ALWAYS lived in the castle…”

PoodleGroomer: Stilettoes or poison?

warjoski: Momma always made Alvin wear the pretty blonde wig and the lovely red dress. Momma never wanted a little boy. They’re so … messy

Serendewi: So, you don’t call to say you’ll be late, then you sneak in at 3 a.m. by climbing the porch shed roof and jimmying the hall window, then you trip over the dog and step on the cat’s tail, waking and scaring the baby into a crying fit … and you wonder why we’re a little annoyed, Hermann?

Kind&Kinder: Dear old, rich old Grandma, “If we knew you were comin’ we’d ‘ve baked a cake, baked a cake, baked a cake. If we knew you were comin’ we’d ’ve baked a cake. How-ja do. How-ja do, How-ja do.”

Radish the wordsmith: Yes, we have a freezer big enough for a family of four, why do you ask?

“I’m sorry, I thought I had a bigger canvas. So could you all get in closer together?”

The only known portrait of the Addams family that includes Wednesday’s elder, adopted, blonde sister.

It was more than a minor mishap/

When the master mislaid the map!/

When the map reappeared/

Its contours were smeared/

With a number of clusters of cr*p…

It was more than a minor mishap when the master mislaid the map when the map reappeared it was horribly smeared with morsels of something like crap.

He’s afraid that senile he has grown/

for the “perp” remains wholly unknown../

but there’s no one to blame/

for the shock and shame:/

he tried – but he’s living alone.