That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for November 20, 2024

Sarah; the tree whisperer

Treehugger, about to get hot & heavy with her tree

/// Walter named this tree The Talking Oak,

claiming that of Olivia it spoke.

Where her carved name defaced

its rough bark she embraced

it, and wondered how Walter’s mind broke.

/// Alfred Tennyson wrote a long verse

on this subject, (it should have been terse).

Walter hears the oak speaking

of the girl he’s been seeking.

I’d critique it, but I’ve written worse.

Daphne? Are you in there?

Sarah is definitely the champion of Hide-and-Seek. Everybody else is inside the house … 2 miles away.

And the artist was named after his Maw.

Precursor to Rose and her “let it be” tree.

Moody River is just on the other side, I’ll just leave a quick note. for turnip brain.

She’s not an ancestor of Rose Gumbo by any chance?

The tree barked back enthusiasm.

“We’ve got to stop meeting like this/

Despite the arboreal bliss/

Said the lass to the tree./

Our love cannot be !

My husband knows something’s amiss!”///

Said the tree,” I believe you are right/

And I quite sympathize with your plight:/

Those scratches are nasty-/

you may need dermoplasty /

for my bark is much worse than my bite..”

“Oh Tree, please tell me, does this dress make my a ss look big?”

I can hear you back there. Are you ok? I told you that burrito looked a little suspect.

Charlotte swore that when she put her ear to the tree she could hear the sound of the forest….her friends didn’t have the heart to explain the truth to her.

Does the tree dye its leaves? They are going to Fall off soon anyway.

Of course I love you. I’ll love you even more when your furniture and fire wood.

Well, that woodpecker was right. you can hear the bugs in there.

If it wasn’t a hardwood before, it is now.

“She loves me, she loves my knot.”

Much like a seashell and hearing the ocean, if you put your ear to a tree, you can hear the bugs getting in your ears.

Before the tree huggers, there were the tree whisperers.

“I want to have your acorns.”

Olivia Keebler had a taste for cookies

And contrary to the poem by Tennyson

The Talking Oak spoke from within

Due to the elves who were therein denizen

.

The old oak tree on her father’s estate

Was hollow and housed an elfin bakery

All else was mere fantastic imagery

Or fancy Victorian poetic fakery

.

The elves until then had kept to themselves

Their baked goods for local consumption

That their products could be sold outside their wold

Seemed the height of false presumption

.

Olivia’s onetime lover Walter had carved

Her name in the bark to unknowingly deface

The tree that the elves had long called home

And considered such mark a disgrace

.

Unfortunate for them the lease for the oak

In which they had lived ‘til now rent-free

Was included in the Keebler estate

Along with any ordinary tree

.

A deal was therefore made by which the elves

Would begin a commercial enterprise

To offer baked goods internationally

And share the profits in lieu of rent seemed wise

.

Tennyson in turn agreed to give the project gloss

His poet laureate status suffered no great averse

By his tastefully accepting small royalties

From each cookie box containing samples of his verse

Weeks later, when she discovered the first open sore, she learned why it was called “The Giving Tree.” She was going to have to make some phone calls.

“You’re so big and hard! You make my sap run.”

She wanted to burst out in song but couldn’t think of any “tree” showtunes…

The Talking Oak: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:William Maw Egley" Wikimedia 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, and Brave search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found, and once there find the text string Talkingoak, and click its link for info and links that point to more info (perhaps best viewed using the Google Chrome or Mozilla Firefox browsers, which can automatically translate most webpages if necessary) about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting. File history shows the cropped, strip coloration image. 

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3414 (November 20, 2024) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger, if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to the info about this artist I used to point to here. So far, first work by him used here.

Euell Gibbons daughter. :)

“The Talking Oak”

NO “WOOD” JOKES!

Next season on "The Legend of Vox Machina "…

blind sera likes rough men, but this is too rough she thought.

Not being very bright, she misunderstood what a family tree was, and she spent day and night praying to the tree to give her a baby.

“How to Recognize Different Types of Trees from Quite Close Indeed: #1, The Oak. The Oak. The Oak.”

“Darling, I’m SO sorry! I should have known that offering to show you my beaver would frighten you!”

Horace come out come out wherever you are…I only have a half hour lunch…….

“I love yew so much. What? I’m certain I said ‘you!’ Don’t be such an ash.”

If you sincerely apologize, I will use another spell to get you out of the tree.

“Baby girl, don’t listen to what the Lorax says. He doesn’t speak for me.”

“When you can’t see the forest because you’re seeing one tree exclusively.”

OK, I took off my hat. Is it REALLY too much to ask that you wear a condom? I seriously don’t want to deal with splinters.