Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 21, 2011

  1. Emerald
    margueritem  almost 13 years ago

    Riiight….

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  2. Man hat2
    rf_eq  almost 13 years ago

    Many of my friends are beer snobs. In the past I would always try their fancy beers. Now I proudly order the cheapest domestic beer available. It taste better to me.

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  3. Kittay
    naturally_easy  almost 13 years ago

    What’s with the chef’s hat and apron?

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    artybee  almost 13 years ago

    He’s barbecuing.I drank enough of that American weasel-whizz to float a ship. Now I only drink micro-brews. Thank heavens.

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  5. Nelsandkaren
    NELS BALWIT Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    Many Americans only drink beer to get buzzed or drunk. They don’t care what it tastes like as long as it cheap.

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  6. Chris88
    chireef  almost 13 years ago

    walruscarver2000 said,

    @Sisyphos

    Saw it. It was just OK. Now next Wednesday’s…that’s funny.

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    pbarnrob  almost 13 years ago

    Plus, once they’d had enough of it, nomad scavenging got much harder to do. Finding your knees can be pretty hard after enough.

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    wcorvi  almost 13 years ago

    Once I overheard a comment in a University-town bar: “I really like those good German beers like Heinekens.” Heinekens is, of course, Dutch.

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    Hugh B. Hayve  almost 13 years ago

    In Canada we like to refer to American beer as pony piss.

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    James Lindley Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    Hugh, I’ve never tried Canadian beer (yet). Most American beers are made more for quantity than quality though. There are some good American beers, but the big players in the game (the now Belgian owned company, one owned by a UK company, Colorado Kool-Ade) are not our best products. Actually, I’ve referred to them as goat piss.

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  11. Boris badenov
    bbadenov  almost 13 years ago

    I was in Brussels, Belgium a few years ago and was dragged to a tavern called “Mort Subite” which offered a beer of the same name. The term means “sudden death” and since it tasted like vinegar, the name was most appropriate.

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  12. Kitty at sunset
    wicky  almost 13 years ago

    And that pony pee you call beer in canada is better…feh.

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  13. Tiger
    sharklungs  almost 13 years ago

    Cock and Bull makes a great ginger beer and it’s American.

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  14. Flagfeetani
    ninetoes  almost 13 years ago

    And here all I was going to point out is that it must be a Bud.

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    sleeepy2  almost 13 years ago

    “In Canada we like to refer to American beer as pony piss.”

    In the U.S. we rarely, if ever, refer to Canada.

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  16. Car
    hypershock  almost 13 years ago

    @c001: “Root beer” is also known as “sarsaparilla” try looking for that instead

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    Twonky  almost 13 years ago

    Rat is wearing a chef’s hat and an apron to represent BARBECUE.

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    WaitingMan  almost 13 years ago

    The best beer in the world is that fine British product, “Samuel Smith’s Oatmeal Stout”.

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    doublepaw  almost 13 years ago

    My German mother in law drank only Heinekens………and Milwaukee’s Best. Said they were the two best beers in the world, and she drank plenty of a lot of different beers.

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    Uh, Actually Daddy  almost 13 years ago

    I’ll admit to being a beer snob, but I prefer an American microbrew made right up in Oregon… Rogue’s Morimoto Soba Ale (and it’s sister, Morimoto Black Obi Soba) to anything else, foreign or domestic. I’ll agree with the great people of Canadia, however, with regards to alcohol content…if you drink to get drunk, you can’t beat a foreign beer. If you drink for the taste and sheer enjoyment of a beer though, you can’t beat an American microbrew. Oh, and Budweiser is horse piss, but Nattie Light is liquefied horse sh*t… -MF www.actuallydaddy.com

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    bmonk  almost 13 years ago

    ‘Joke about English beer: “Drink your beer before it gets cold”.’

    ++++

    Of course, American lagers have to be served cold, or the lack of flavor would be too noticable.

    But some microbrews do have better flavor.

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  22. Wyatt
    Gking  almost 13 years ago

    God Forbid if ANY American is proud of ANYTHING American-made…. (I know they’re aren’t many American-made things anymore.)

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  23. Real government
    CogentModality  almost 13 years ago

    Pabst Blue Ribbon is owner by an American citizen.

    To the dickens with “And hows your bush”

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    cdward  almost 13 years ago

    Used to live in Germany and I do prefer German beers. Unfortunately, what’s imported into the US is not nearly as good. My favorite was Einbecker made in (you guessed it), Einbeck. Real root beer is quite good, but it’s nearly impossible to find here nowadays. Most of what passes for root beer is actually soda.

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    boogshine  almost 13 years ago

    Pastis has option 2, Rat option 3. Option 1 is the microbrewed American beer that doesn’t advertise. Real, local, delicious. I do not approve the message.

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    Defective Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    Other people have said it, but I have to reiterate for those that don’t like American beer. There are literally hundreds of micro breweries across the US. And many of them are very very good. We can be proud of those people that craft their beer with care and love.

    Beer in America is traditionally served cold to numb the taste buds. If you realized how bad most beers tasted, you wouldn’t drink them. A properly served beer, that tastes good, is served just below room temp. So the joke about ‘English beers getting cold’ is kinda stupid. They’re warm by comparison, but cool. I’ve had a few pints in English pubs and enjoyed them. There are places that serve their beer cold, though.

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    comicsboi Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    On the root beer vein … I like ginger beer even more. And the other day I discovered an alcoholic ginger beer out of Quebec. Yum.

    I think nearly any country has good micro-brews these days. There are some great ones in both the U.S. and Canada. The problem is that many of the real micro-brews don’t get distributed much outside of their local area.

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    comicsboi Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    BTW I’m Canadian. But my favourite U.S. beer right now is the Maui Brewing Company’s Coconut Porter. Unfortunately, it seems impossible to get outside of Hawaii.

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    yatman  almost 13 years ago

    Enough, y’all! Just pop an ice cold Corona and shut up! Don’t forget the lime.

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  30. Frog4
    Digital Frog  almost 13 years ago

    Rat is now a Bitweiser.

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  31. United federation
    corzak  almost 13 years ago

    “Back in ancient Mesopotamia, brewing enabled farmers to preserve the nutritive value of their grains past the normal rotting point . . .”Not only that, but maybe even more importantly, the alcohol in beer killed water-born infectious diseases and parasites. Drinking the water in ‘civilized centers’ in Mesopotamia and Egypt in 3000 BC was a virtual death sentence.

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  32. Andy
    Sandfan  almost 13 years ago

    There are some fine American micro brews, and some fine beers from Britain and Belgium, but for consistent widespread excellence it’s Germany by a landslide.

    I don’t know if it’s still the same, but when I was in Germany in the 60s, beer was available by home delivery, just like milk used to be. The beerman would come and pick up your empties and replace them with full bottles of German goodness. A benchmark of modern civilization, in my opinion.

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    dukeallen  almost 13 years ago

    As a non-drinker all I can say is…BFD. No nyucks here stevie!

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    Malcolm Hall  almost 13 years ago
    I’m with you on the beer but not on the wine. German reds are, well, at best, not half bad.
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  35. Swc1
    SaltWaterCroc  almost 13 years ago

    By “American Beer” I assume y’all are referring to mass produced stuff. The local brewers here tend to produce some good beers (and I’ve consumed them from Europe to India to Australia). Everything thing from a good Coffee Porter to Polygamy Porter to a Messiah Nut Brown Ale.

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    tigre1  almost 13 years ago

    Can’t drink American beer. Once in a while, at a friend’s, but why buy? Nothing there.

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    Ginrummy33  almost 13 years ago

    Not all American beer is bad, just avoid the big chain factories, like always. Sam Adams is a great beer and widely available, along with many limited distributed area beers. Just shop a bit.

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  38. Tumble
    Keno21  almost 13 years ago

    My fave rave? My own home-brewed Bavarian Bock. #2? An ice cold Dos XX. Bud? It’s piss water. Same with Molson. I heard Stella Artois is replacing the Clydesdale with a Citroen being pulled by poodles (We spit on you Americans! Poo!)

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    Ginrummy33  almost 13 years ago

    FYI, Anhauser Busch is now European owned, which is probably what the strips is referring to. But you wouldn’t know that from all their flag-waving ads. When most people refer to “American beer” they’re probably talking about that company’s Busch or Budweiser or Michelob, all of which are made with a bunch of rice instead of more expensive barley, which is one reason they taste bad now.

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    Slam Dragon  almost 13 years ago

    ok

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    Number Three  almost 13 years ago

    Did you, Rat?

    LOL xxx

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  42. Right here
    Sherlock Watson  almost 13 years ago

    The people who have flags waving from their car/truck doors and bumper stickers that say “America Bless God” are the very people the FBI should be investigating; nobody puts up that big a front unless they’re hiding something.

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    PShaw0423  almost 13 years ago

    Now, really…not all American beer is swill. Samuel Adams puts out some good brews.

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    bamboodan  almost 13 years ago

    The thing about beer is that it tastes the same going in as it does (I assume, no actual test here) going out. It’s okay for kids trying to act like grownups. Me? I’ll take my coffee – Cuban coffee – strong. Strong enough to put hair on your chest, so ladies, be advised. Save the beer for fried-fish batter, or for the plants outside.

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    Dr Sheriff MB esq PhD DML   almost 13 years ago

    Long Live Stout Ales…!!! Cheers!!!

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    ChukLitl Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    Pabst is still American owned & red, white & blue labeled. It’s usually been one of the cheapest, & not bad for the price.Coors in now Canadian owned.

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    dvparrothead  almost 13 years ago

    Apparently y’all haven’t gone beyond Miller, Coors and Bud to say American beer is bad. Try Summit, Tallgrass, Schell’s, Goose Island, and so on. I can’t stand Coors Light either, but rather than complaining, I search out the good stuff. BTW, a lot of European beers aren’t that hot either, and quite a bit of Canadian beer has a skunky quality, eh.

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    Artie Adams  almost 13 years ago

    Yuengling is still America’s oldest and American-ownedest brewery, and it ain’t bad for a beer you can see through.

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    EricAlder  almost 13 years ago

    Good beer is good and bad beer is bad, regardless of where they come from. Let your taste buds tell you – nothing else.

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  50. Penguins
    sandigilbo  almost 13 years ago

    True, Germany doesn’t have root beer, but WE don’t have Spezi – oh, how I miss that soft drink! And, I miss the beer delivery truck, nordic skiing, volksmarches, dirndls, Christkindles Markt…

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    Drewdove  almost 13 years ago

    Commercial American beer sucks while micro-brews like Anchor Steam bring the flavor.

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  52. Oddballsayssilkscreen
    sprint11  almost 13 years ago

    There’s a cure for that!-

    http://www.yuengling.com/

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  53. Kirk1
    jimelek  almost 13 years ago

    You tell him, Steph!

    You want real American beer? Go to your local brewery or try a Sam Adams, always a good decision.

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    tallcanofbeer  almost 13 years ago

    it’s in the USA that’s what makes it great

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  55. Swine
    pigs an idiot  almost 13 years ago

    wow rat wow

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    AlbertNonyMouse  almost 13 years ago

    Fortunately, I live less than 75 miles from Pottsville, PA, and I’m enjoying a Yuengling Lager while I’m typing this. An amazingly good beer at an amazingly good price (66¢/bottle if one shops it a bit…)!

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    trimguy  almost 13 years ago

    I never much cared for “Buttwiper”. Give me an Abita ;)

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    alviebird  almost 13 years ago

    Recommended American brews.

    Samuel Adams:

    Pale AleScotch AleBoston AleI.P.A.

    Flying Dog:I.P.A.Pale Ale

    There are more.

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    RandomK9  almost 13 years ago

    It’s fun how when some people don’t like what you like….they need “educating”… yes I am American…my favorite beers are Dos Equise, Blue Moon, and Kilians Red…snobery of any kind breeds disdain…stop it…I bet Hitler used to talk crap about what the Jews liked to drink ;)

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  60. Kirk1
    jimelek  almost 13 years ago

    Yuengling is just another crap rice beer that is slightly better than Bud/Miller/Coors.

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    Kvasir42 Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    What does it say about PBS’s readership that there is such an extensive discussion about beer and beers? (Including me—mass-produced American beer is like drinking bad-tasting water, but there are now a lot of good micro-brews). I loved living in Germany and their variety of beers. Japan’s mass-produced beer is still way better than the major American brands.

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    frog_101  almost 13 years ago

    What a great bunch of comments! There are some good US beers – like there are good German and UK beers… there are also some major duff ones across the globe too! For a US challenge – try the OTHER Budweiser (clue: it’s European). That said – I loved the fact that at Busch gardens I could have beer and ride rollercoasters… something unheard of in the UK when I travelled; so I tip my hat to you chaps on that one!

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  63. Mutts5
    KatP Premium Member almost 12 years ago

    Canadian beer FTW! (not all of it, but there are lots of great ones). American beer, especially when you’re actually buying it in the States, is watered down crapola.

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    dfrost1  about 4 years ago

    German beer has been brewed in accordance with the purity law for more than 500 years. The purity law requires that ‘nothing other than barley, hops and water be used’ to produce beer. … The importance of yeast was not known at the time and was added later.

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