Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 12, 2012

It’s an age-old rule, Bob: you don’t bring Quilted Northern to a gunfight.

Ah, Larry has seen that plan B won’t work, either. Wonder if there is a plan C?

How about smack Zebra’s head against the sink or wall, or drown him in toilet or sink?

Obveeosly smuther zeeba in softness not uh opshun.

Must be a swank restaurant to have anything other than low-bid sandpaper-on-a-roll in the stalls.

Extra Soft — just like croc brains.This one’s name is Bob…so he might as well do something stupid.Bobs never make it out alive anyway…Bob-bye, redshirt Bob.

I see the platform commitee is already hard at work.

@ margueritem: I don’t know if the crocs know that many letters …

People keep thinkin’ that us Bobs never dies, but it just happens to be a little known fact that Bob very common name among crocs.

New plan. Take all toilet paper. When zeebra have to go bathroom he won’t be able to leave because no toilet paper. Eventually zeeba neighbor starve. Crocs rejoice and have dinner.

Use John Wayne toilet paper! Tough as nails and doesn’t take crap from no one!

@nighthawks yesterday, ya it just dawned on me,Peter Sellers that other British guy. Really enjoyed the character.

Abort the hit?! What kind of third-rate would-be predator are you, Larry?Quick, Bob! Launch an all-out kamikaze attack against Zeeba Neighba and maybe you’ll have some luck! —Or the restaurant bouncer will toss you out….

Now that’s a resturant restroom I’d LOVE to find. Heck, I’d love to find a supermarket or department store with a restroom like that. None of the ones around here use extra soft toilet tissue.

Please don’t squeeze the Charmin, Bob.

If Bob hits Zebra with Charmin, he might give him a bad case of Whipple-lash. (Older folks will get that one.)

Ha, ha, ha – great line

My sister gave me a toilet brush for my birthday…..It works OK I guess, but still prefer toilet paper it’s less scratchy…

sorry for spamming dude, i’ll try not to do that any more :)

So, plan #2 didn’t come out right at the end.

not particularly.

Have the crocs seen Plan 9 from Outer Space?

Maybe Bob could flush Zeeba out with a plumber’s friend. . . ☻

Just gets better and better. Jeenee-a@@.

typical reader here…love the Crocs while still hoping Zeeba neighbor stays safe…hate – absolutely detest Rat and think Pig should get a clue (or two)…but really, toilet paper as a weapon?…..sheesh………..me and Goat going to Pibgorn…

Hahahahahaha!

That plan went down the drain then.

LOL xxx

Most commonly found in public restrooms: Wax Paper, Sandpaper, and No Paper.

Cram ’im into a toilet tank!

Or go into the main part of the restaurant and throw a fork at him. That’d kill him for sure.

This would NEVER happen to Michael Corleone!!!

Bob could lure him into the bathroom and give him a “swirlly!”

crocks are fuunny