For Better or For Worse by Lynn Johnston for September 01, 2012

You asked for it Ellie! On another note, is it me or does Phil’s girlfriend look like John and Ellie’s future daughter April?

sigh John, when are you ever going to learn that only a fool utters all his mind, and that some things are much better off being left unsaid?

And in the end, they got divorced.

John is a boor.

Some think living together before marriage is wrong but,you never know how you will get along after a few months. Everyone can be on their best behavior for while then real personalities finally come out. If you find out that you are not compatible, you have a way out. If you were married and started having problems especially if you have kids there is the high divorce rates. Or even worse, spousal abuse which could turn deadly. I would worry more about my son or daughter being trapped in an unhealthy marriage than what polite society thinks. Now that’s just MY opinion. Some one please respond to my comment. Is my thinking justified?

It takes two people to make a marriage work. If both parties knew that they were simply doing a ‘trial run’ , they may not be so apt to put a sincere effort into making the relationship work. In fact, if one has grown tired of the relationship, he/ she may not be honest about it and simply feign a situation in which all blame is placed on the innocent party and consequently, destroying their self- confidence and trust for years.

It’s not fair to enter a commitment with the focus on ensuring you have a way out rather than on learning to be a dynamic twosome.

John is just goading Ellie, as usual, because she takes everything so ultra seriously and he just can’t resist needling her. She should know him by now and simply laugh it off….or find a way to get even . Lol

Once again, WRONG Answer, John!!

I knew several couples who lived together for several years and then got married, only to divorce later on after the kids came.

I have to agree that a relationship has to be real with real consequences before it’s taken seriously. That, and if both parties are truly gunning for marriage in the end, rather than just making excuses to co-habitate, they won’t reveal all their cards in order to convince one another that they’re a smart match. As to the divorce rate, abusive relationship should end, but many divorces are due to both parties being selfish and unwilling to compromise.

Course, I’ve never married, so take what I say with a grain of salt.

I have never known a couple to live together to stay together. They have all divorced..I think couples who live together “to see if it will work” still have their “ambassador” selves on, and do not let themselves truly be their sloppy or naggy or otherwise unattractive selves..I do think spending overnights are important, as are trips, but unless the couple is truly committed to a relationship (marriage, commitment, or another serious venture), living together is a distraction to who the other person is..Just MHO.

It’s sad to see this comic strip going down the drain.

You still can but it’ll cost 100 times more.

I’m with dotweasl. While living together first may work for some like bevgrey, they’re more the exception than the rule. Possibly this worked years ago when people still treated each other with respect and wanted to be with each other for a long time. But now, people do not think about anyone other than themselves, they have short attention spans and they think cheating is okay. For various reasons, people do not want to put in the effort to have a lasting relationship and the word “marriage” scares them. People don’t realize that marriage will have its rough times along with the good times, so they don’t put in the work it takes to get through the rough times. (kfccanada also put it well.)I disagree with samfran60. If people take their blinders off, it’s easy to see a person’s personality before you get married. And the abusive angle does happen, but it will happen if you are living together or if you are married, so that is irrelevant. The people in the relationship should know what they are getting into, and it doesn’t mean you HAVE TO live together. I knew my husband was a good person after a month, so it’s not that hard.

3,7,and 20. That is what I was told when I got my divorce. That is the number of years in which the most divorces happen. All related to the kids and their ages. Doesn’t matter if you lived together or not. When the kids come, when the kids start to school, and when the kids leave home, that’s the deal.

Careful John..she cooks your dinner!!

I didn’t live with my first or second spouse ahead of time. Had I, I might have realized that they were abusers and not married them.

I lived with #3 for 2 years and guess what? We just celebrated our 20th anniversary.

you can’t fit all couples into the same thought-box

I prefer family fun, not reflections of bitterness about the divorce!

First it was called “trial marriage.” It was popular among the “beatniks,” as they were called in those days. Then it was “living together,” then it was “shacking up.”Then came that acronym, and that awful poem, “POSSLQ” (pronounce “possil-cue”). I reckon today you can call it just about anything you want.

John says what we all think, even the women.

Just because ‘“beatniks” did it, doesn’t mean they were the first – they definitely were NOT! Marriage, as an institution for the common folk (and many of the royals) did not start until 1200-1300 AD. Although many early Christian sects were all members of the same sex(societies way of handling the simple minded), many were group marriages.

The whole idea of marriage was for inheritance, and the joining of power. Today it is for the begetting of children (and having 2 guardians that are financially responsible) and the joining of wealth(power). If you do not intend either, why even bother?

It appears that a point has been missed here:SHE, TOO WOULD HAVE HAD A CHANCE TO BACK OUT!!

At least they finally got the piano moved!

You put your foot in your mouth. Prepare to suffer on this one.

dotweasl, my wife and i lived togethe for 4 years, then got married in 1982. our daughters are 21 and 25, and we’re still together. i know several couples of which this is true. samfran60, i know of a number of people in my parent’s generation who got married before having sex, not to mention not living together, and ended up having horrible sex lives. one of these women told her daughter to never get married with someone they didn’t sleep with to avoid tragic “surprises”. some of these folks, to my knowledge, were never “unfaithful” either, and consequently NEVER experienced satisfactory sex. the good old days indeed.

@bartbuzz – this strip has already been discontinued. These are reruns.

@dotweasl – As for living together, my wife and I lived together for 16 year and had three kids before we finally decided to make it all legal. We’re going on 34 years together now. Commitment is commitment, paper or no paper.

@Keeper 98 – Tell that to all the Baby Mommas out there living on the government teat.

I’ve heard the proposal that marriage should be renewable,like a driver’s license,or a military enlistment. At the end of the term,both parties have the choice to continue or not. Of course,if one wants to continue and the other does not,that automatically terminate the marriage. There would also be legal issues (of course) if there are children involved. Also,I’ve heard another proposal that divorce should be easy for couples,but marriage should be hard to get. There was a movie about that very subject,and it was played for laughs,but really,if a couple really wants to get married,than perhaps a little blood,sweat,toil,and tears are required for a couple to decide if this is a step they really want to take. I don’t know what the above BSTT would entail,but maybe that’s the answer to the problem of bad marriages and the high divorce rate. After all,how often do we hear about horrible marriages lasting for decades leading to affairs,domestic abuse and acrimonious splits? On a related note,ever notice that there are tons of books about how to have a great bridal shower/wedding/reception/honeymoon,but not one that tells you how to have a great marriage? (And yes,I know someone will mention the Bible,but not everyone follows its precepts,especially if one or both parties are athiest(s). Thoughts,Group Mind?

I’m guessing Elly is mad because she could have gotten out of this crazy situation with her brain intact.

So remind me again why this panel is funny? Or this strip is funny or even relevant?

John’s foot will be in his mouth unless he’s careful of what to say!

My wife and I shacked up for 6 years before we got married. We’ve been happily married with children for 12 years, so, sometimes it does work.

I had cousins who lived with whom they intended to marry. One cousin actually broke up another marriage and then her marriage did not last long as he was abusive. She later remarried and he treats her great. Their parents married 24 hours after they met would have been sooner, she was not pregnant either, Just KS law would not allow minor to marry. They are still married after 4 children, grandchildren and great grandchildren and over 60 years of marriage.My own parents met, my dad divorced his first wife. They stayed married after 45 years died a month later. Both examples no one shacked up on a trial basis. My husband and I married 31 years we never lived together.

I meant “beyond.” Already corrected the durn thing once.

My husband and I did not live together before we were married (5 years ago). Our choice, but our parents would definitely have given us a hard time otherwise, due to our faith.

That said, if my husband ever said what John says in that last panel, I’d laugh and give him a playful swat.

Life is serious enough so learn to laugh at it and yourself!

The statistics are that 60% of couples who lived together, then get married end up divorced, but listening to these comments, seems that percentage should be a lot higher.

after 23 years of bliss, we still kid each other and threaten to tell young newlyweds … “go back, you made a mistake. get out while you can!” (Course, I got the better end of the deal than my wif did.)