Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 30, 2012

Finger in the ear is a bit rude.

Wrong, oh Road Breath.

Lets see “Gods” reaction when the doping tests come back.

“orinoco womble said, about 22 hours ago @JusSayin I have no idea how to pronounce either one, having only seen them written down, but I was told it was kind of like “Nackitoosh.” Is that right?”______________________In LA it is either nak uh TISH or nak uh TUHSH.

In TX the same tribe became nag uh DOH tchis.

This fellow seems rather like the Pharisee of the parable, who “prayed to himself.”

+++++

As a bicyclist, I always tried to obey the Rules of the Road—if there’s no traffic, it doesn’t matter, and if there it, it can save your butt. As a walker, I do likewise.

It may be that Jeff the Cyclist thinks Pig should exercise more. A possible indication of this is Jeff referring to Pig as “Fatty McFat Fat”.

I’m thinking I do not like Jeff the Cyclist. I wonder if an “accident” could be arranged—say, with the help of Li’l Guard Duck (besides, Pvt. Duckling needs some real-world experience as part of his training)….

If it weren’t for the fact that Jeff once appeared along side Rat you’d think he was Rat in disguise.

Hey Jeff, since you pray to yourself and commit such hubris by declaring yourself a god, does this mean you’ve never once won a race and that you’re constantly run off the road by folks who think you look like the ultimate dork in that outfit? Bet your back side is enormous.

Clever disguise by Pastis. Add an “F” to the name and we’ll never be able to tell who Jeff really is.

This J C is no one’s savior.

man this guys goin’ to hell in a handbasket

Nice nod to Jef Mallett, creator of Frazz

So humble

What really burns me is how they will always run stop signs. Hey cycling nut, the rules of the road apply equally to you too…

Jeff was Bob the Croc in a previous life.

“I am BUGS”BicyclingUrbanGod inSpandex.“Humble thy car in homage to my greatness!”.To which the masses say: “May you be unable to find the Gold Bond to cure extreme chafing.”

Jeff is a little overamped this morning. He should have gone with his usual Lance Armstrong breakfast blend and not opted for the Floyd Landis Super T special.

If a cyclist obeys the traffic laws and gets run over by a car, it is still often blamed on the cyclist. If I’m cycling and a person driving a car makes a mistake, I die. If I make a mistake, I die. The non-lycra billboard wearing cyclists in my area generally follow the rules of the road. Wish I lived in a state that lets cyclists treat stop signs as yield and stop lights as stop signs. It makes much more sense for a self-propelled vehicle.

Obligatory Monkey Dust reference to The Cyclists…

(Cont. from above)People don’t generally act like this in St. Petersburg, Then I began noticing that the people in the line whose extremities weren’t covered, all had extensive tattoos, some featuring skulls and such. (Bikers?) One fellow had his left arm and left leg completely covered, and his right arm and leg were bare. I didn’t see any bikes outside – there was a Ribfest or something going on several blocks away, and they must have walked. I’m also positive there are great folks who are crawling with tats, but those women were not among them, IMHO.

Wait, you mean he ISN’T God???

Why don’t we have a strip where Rat whacks Jeff with a baseball bat? That just might get Stephan the Reuben!

Other people use the phrase “Fatty McFat Fat?”

…Huh.

Jeff the Cyclist….

More like Jeff the CONCEITED!

Poor Pig.

xxx

The road rash has obviously made Jeff the cyclist delusional.

That’s Mighty Funny………………………..

Jeff The Cyclist must be Tom Cruise.

Bite me, Pastis

Have to wait to see Frazz’s response.

Far too many cyclists have that “holier than thou” attitude. They don’t seem to think they need to obey the rules (laws)of the road just because they ride bikes. I see the road signs a lot that say “Share the Road”.Yet cyclists seem to feel they are entitled to more than their share ".In NYC (Manhattan) cyclist were regularly staging Friday afternoon “Bike Ins”, slowly riding up the streets during the Friday night rush hour and deliberately slowing and congesting the traffic.Police arrested some and seized bikes, but they continued. The purpose was to pressure the city to create Bike Lanes in Manhattan.Well, they finally did, taking away parking on the entire side of a street where they put them in, to the outrage of the people that lived there, as parking is difficult to find.They are now little used and the bike messengers still weave in and out of traffic and ride on the sidewalks when it suits them. Not so many people ride bikes in Manhattan as public transit and taxis are freely available.But the arrogant Mayor of NYC,Mike Bloomberg didn’t care. He also creates “pedestrian plazas” by closing streets by his whim, despite the protests of drivers and residents; yet he closes firehouses and schools, and lays off teachers because the city is “facing a budget crises”. What BS!So the bikers got their way, to the detriment of everyone else.“Share the Road”? Sure, but why don’t bikers share the COST of those roads? They don’t pay gasoline tax or registration or license fees. They don’t pay insurance. They don’t even pay TOLLs like the rest of us. (When did you ever see a cyclist pay to cross a bridge?)So $%#@ you, arrogant biker hypocrites!

What @Spamgaard said. It’s actually safer for everyone if cyclists can glide through stop signs (after checking) — they can stop a LOT shorter than cars can. If the laws of traffic adapted more closely to the laws of physics we’d be better off.

Cyclists in my state (Utah) want the protections of the law when they ride but not the penalities, they often run stop signs, only slow for red lights and when riding on road’s don’t ride single file they’ll ride 4 or more a breast holding traffic back. Yet when they get ticketed for holding up traffic they think its unfair, they want the protections but not the penality. They have the same rights and responsiblities as a car, they need to let people pass if they are holding up everyone else just as a car must.

I live on the east coast of Florida and motorcycle all over the state on the same scenic roads that the cyclists use. Their arrogance is to the nth degree, as they ride 3 & 4 abreast & hold up traffic. Try riding behind them for miles in 1st & 2nd gear on an 850+ lb. motorcycle. Not to mention their ignoring the rules of the road. We have state bike rules pamphlets to hand out, but I’m sure I know where they end up..@ Gokie re: tats. Don’t judge a book by the cover, as the average Harley owner is quite wealthy. The larger bikes start at $30K and that’s before the extra chrome, service costs and tire replacement, etc. The reason I cover up my tattoos when I work is because of the stereotype..It is obvious that Pastis has had a belly-full of snobby cyclists – I’m with you, brother..Of course, there are exceptions. I’m sure all the cyclists who read this strip are law abiding and considerate on the road.

More old jokes:After a bug splats a windshield, say I’ll bet he doesn’t have the guts to do that again..Also: You can tell he’s a motorcycle rider by the bugs on his teeth.

Bicycle bicycle bicycleI want to ride my bicycle bicycle bicycleI want to ride my bicycleI want to ride my bikeI want to ride my bicycleI want to ride it where I like(or so Queen says : ) )

“erradicated”. Beautiful and so apt! Sort of a portmanteau pun, and a good one!

I should have quoted the sentence: “Common sense is erradicated from the average cyclist’s brain when they strap on that helmet”.

I drive a car and I ride a bicycle…have for years. If I can get to work on a bike I figure I’m doing everyone a favor. And here’s why:

I pay the same taxes that everyone else does and my impact upon the roads (which those taxes pay for) is far less.

How many cyclists have you heard about in the news that have killed someone in an accident (other than themselves)?

My impact upon the environment is far less.

I’m improving my health, which has a positive effect upon our health services in the long run.

I don’t advocate cyclists breaking the law. But when the law doesn’t adequately cover cyclists, then what recourse is there? There aren’t enough of us to leverage the system and cycling lobbyists? Ha! Non existent.

Example: Traffic signals were NEVER set up to account for cyclists. Try this, get on a bicycle one morning and attempt to cross a busy intersection. Sit at the light. (Don’t get on the sidewalk to activate the signal, sidewalks are for “pedestrians”.) Continue sitting at the light until it turns green. You’ll sit there for an eternity…or until a car comes and turns the light for you. Even if you DO activate the crossing signal, oftentimes it only works if there’s a car trying to cross as well…most pedestrians know this.

Many roads have VERY dangerous sections that don’t allow ample room for cyclists. And as such, unless the cyclist is seen, they’re in danger (especially these days w/ all the distractions available in a car: phones, texting, ipods, etc.). I know it pisses a lot of you folks in cars off, but I’d rather have you mad than unaware and ignorant. It’ll save my life.

Most of you who are complaining about cyclists have never attempted to commute anywhere. You ride on a bike path on occasion or tool around on the weekend from here to there in the neighborhood. Try commuting for a month, I’d be willing to bet you’ll change your toon. (Yeah, bit of a pun there.)

oh dear…lol…

Man, the comments here are depressing. A bunch of self-entitled cagers circle-jerking in an orgy of hate.

I work with a guy like that…

can anyone be more pretentious than him?