Oh My Flunking Goth … and that’s Deputy Dawg of the EIEIO in Slimedroppers … offering advice Horn Hair should have taken with Thick …
This was one of my Columbus Day guesses–but it was my stoopid guess, my joke guess, my no-way-would- anyone-but-an-amateur-do-this guess.
Aside from the fact that the CIA does not operate inside the USA, and the SEC and IRS don’t do this sort of undercover work … why are they all standing there chattering when their subject is fleeing them? And with what crime does Thick want to charge D-cubed?
So FOUR other judicial organizations figured this out before Spacy, not counting the local newspapers that told him about this. With so many people looking for work, how does Spacy have a job?
Thick’s best move now is to start gibbering in schizophrenic, wander off, then run home, shower, shave, give Tess a pickle-tickle, then show up for work tomorrow and tell Horn Hair that he didn’t find anything. Then, when the other undercover agents claim they saw him, he can say no, you saw some homeless guy who got delusional, you know how those people are …
Just think, if Thick had run a proper investigation, he could have spared himself the embarrassment, and probably busted a real criminal … while the big-name Federal agencies were making fools of themselves on the street.
How exciting though, that Locher got to draw four different badges, from four different policing agencies, all in one panel! I think each design was borrowed from the hat of one Naperville police officer
Not “Security.”
————————————————–
After the way this strip has been going you are letting a little thing like spelling bother you? I think this is the high point of this arc. Now we can start on another ridiculous story.
I suppose–I am making a desperate effort to find something logical here–that D-cubed is being investigated because he’s the one who revealed the criminal activities of his rivals. This action drove down the value of their stocks, which then allowed him to buy a controlling interest in We’re-lying-twerprises. Meanwhile, D-cubed built up his original fortune by “lifting” secret technology from DoD.
The crime? He had insider information on We’re-Lyin. His inside source was Butterfly McCorpse, who he murdered to keep from talking. The hundred million dollar withdrawal was openly done so he could secretly buy depressed We’re-Lyin’ stocks.
His wife? Mrs. Pruneface and Mr.-Rowland-from-my-bank have stolen D-cubed’s fortune and gone to Rio, or Switzerland, or Monaco.
D-cubed will get acquitted at his trial because as Thick knows the local courts coddle criminals. He’ll defend himself with an insanity plea, because only a lunatic would elude the cops by living on the streets and giving away huge sums of money. But he’s now broke and will end up homeless.
Sue Doko is his accomplice. She’ll go to prison and get three squares a day, ha-ha-ha, ho-ho-ha!
As a courtesy,Flight Suit, and to avoid the sort of bungling seen here. But do Thick, Horn Hair and Testicle Chin belong to the Nappingville PD? Maybe they’re a long-lost vaudeville act, or forgotten rivals to the Three Stooges and the Ritz Brothers.
Interesting thing here–the last panel has five people in it. When was the last time the Locher Mess Monster had that many people in one panel?
see Section 5.2, “Cooperation With Criminal Authorities.” Yes, the SEC talks to local police when there are parallel investigations. They do admit to “special circumstances,” which I suppose could mean “don’t cooperate with asshats.”
I can’t find anything about the SEC doing undercover work–and why would they? I doubt that D-cubed was hauling around the only copies of his business records with him.
The SEC’s been in the news a lot, due to the mortgage mess and economic collapse. I’m guessing Locher put them in the story just to make it seem topical.
To be fair, faking your death is probably a crime. And there’s the matter of that dead body made to look like him. Unless someone else did that, DDD’s guilty of murder.
Now what about Inspector Thompson’s Gazelle of the Yard?
Cyber V, the ME said he couldn’t find a cause of death for Butterfly McCorpse, and the only identification came from Mrs. D’apostrophe. We’ve seen nothing to the contrary. There’s no positive evidence yet that D’cubed was involved in the death. It’s a reasonable suspicion however, and Thick should ask a detective to check it out.
But it would be just like Locher to announce that Thick knew something that the readers never saw, and he’s known all along D-cubed dunnit. “Oh, the special task force learned the facts, you shoulda realized it!”
Totally surreal, even for the man who gave us the pig-on-wheels.
Not sure why or how the IRS would be involved; one would think that the Secret Service would instead be concerned about where all the $1000 bills, which have been out of circulation for decades, were coming from. Sorry, Locher, but having the ATF involved instead of the CIA would be a lot more believable. Not that that would really do your plot any good.
And did 3D really fake his own death as someone stated? I think all they had to go by by way of ID was that butterfly tat. No papers or any other identification were found with the body. And why does everyone involved (in the strip) continue to believe that the philanthropic bum is 3D anyway?
btmosley, maybe the other agents have credible evidence that they had found D-cubed. Thick doesn’t have it.
Endless days of Thick in a confrontation with the homeless guys, and it ends with the equivalent of a cream pie in the face. And what happens when the patrol that Horn Hair promised shows up? Will D-cubed produce a gun and start plinking away, giving Thick his long-awaited chance to duck and cower?
Did Locher have something else in mind, like a wacky insurrection of the homeless, only to be overruled by someone at TMS? Or has he planned all along to make Thick look like a fool?
OK, I was partially wrong yesterday. DT isn’t the only one carrying a badge in sight. Now we have a surplus of badges, each one worn by mavericks in their departments apparently, and not one able to catch a cold much less catch D-Cubed.
Hey, Thick! What if those badges are fake and they’re all homeless guys pretending to be cops? Imagine how silly you’ll look if you just let them go and it turns out they pulled a fast one on ya! Arrest them all for interfering with your investigation!
The CIA is not legally allowed to operate within the US. Its stateside offices and personnel exist solely to co-ordinate overseas activity (in theory, at least).
The $1000 bill featured Grover Cleveland on the front and the words “One Thousand Dollars” on the back. It was printed as a small-size Federal Reserve Note in 1928, 1934 and 1934A, and a small-size Gold Certificate in 1928 and 1934. As of 30 May 2009, there are 165,372 $1,000 bills still being used.
So now we find out that practically every other agency and even the newspapers know more about D-cubed than Tracy and the Napperville police. I just don’t understand Locher,s reason for making Tracy look like a cowardly, bumbling, useless idiot in every story. It’s as if he’s lost touch with the concept of a HERO.
So maybe it *is* a trick on Thick, and while D-cubed gets away the Flab Four take Thick hostage because they’re really (pick one) either part of a well-prepared revolutionary group, or they’re D-cubed’s personal bodyguard, aiding and protecting him as part of their regular jobs. Maybe that patrol is going to arrive just in time to save Thick’s bacon and let him stop some nefarious scheme …
… or maybe that picture of Homeless Guy squatting in an alley, going HO HO HO, HA HA HO was really a self-portrait of Locher laughing at everyone while he trashes Dick Tracy’s reputation.
Sgt. Preston is too competent to waste his time on this kind of nonsense. Dudley Do-Right would be the right man for this job.
…Where is Fearless Fosdick?
Since Fearless was a parody of the original Dick Tracy, I’d say he’s right there in the middle of the first panel.
BTW, the chief should take the Crimestoppers tip when it comes to Slick. He’s certainly no good as a cop; might as well make him the department mascot. And he definitely needs a leash.
Finally, as long as we’re seeing a bunch of undercover agents from agencies that don’t work undercover, why not someone from the FDA, the NTSB, the HSA…
what goods? and why weeks to get the goods on 3D? just arrest the guy as soon as he hands out a $1000 bill! what were they waiting for? they apparently are just as stupid and incompetent as macspacy.
dang, i guess this means macspacy won’t get the tar kicked out of him after all unless the four stooges decide to do it anyway because he’s impeded their “investigation.”
It’s taken us three months to get to this point and it still doesn’t make sense. Incredible…just when you think this strip can’t possibly get any worse, it does.
!: They’re meant to be real cops and Locher is showing his usual indifference to real procedures, real laws and common sense.
2: They’re all carrying fake badges as part of a pre-arranged tactic to cover D-cubed’s escape in case he’s in danger of arrest, and we’re supposed to realize that this time all the inconsistencies and idiocies aren’t Locher’s usual indifference to real procedures, real laws and common sense, but are reliable clues that Thick will see and understand–there’s a first time for everything, I guess.
Personal experience: I came home one morning last year to find the place across the parking lot crawling with US Marshals. Later, I called Carol Stream police to see if I could find out what it was about and they either knew nothing about it or said they didn’t know— take your pick. That was a bit of a surprise since this happened within town limits and this was obviously a large operation with marshals seriously open for business. To this day I can only hazard a guess as to what happened right across the lot from where I live.
Still, you’d think in an operation like the one in the story the feds just might let the locals know if for no other reason than to stop bumbling locals from ruining a federal investigation.
Jumbo, it’s already turned into SOMETHING… Paramount took the ‘idea’ and made a ‘look-a-like’ movie — “Jackass 3-D,” a multi-million dollar hit, while TMS only paid Locher ‘peanuts’ for his ‘Jackass’ 3-D !
Prrdh, you didn’t explain why Offissa Bull Pupp is missing! In case anyone’s memory doesn’t stretch back that far, he was the Offissa who kept arresting Krazy Kat for throwing bricks at Ignatz Mouse – possibly the first policeman to appear in the comics as a regular….
OK. Macy! Where’s your badge? Macy needs to learn how to properly identify himself as a cop like they did. Maybe a day-old donut folded over and wrapped up in a piece of newsprint will do the trick! Or, a couple of pocketfuls of those G-notes would surely ID him.
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
Oh My Flunking Goth … and that’s Deputy Dawg of the EIEIO in Slimedroppers … offering advice Horn Hair should have taken with Thick …
This was one of my Columbus Day guesses–but it was my stoopid guess, my joke guess, my no-way-would- anyone-but-an-amateur-do-this guess.
Aside from the fact that the CIA does not operate inside the USA, and the SEC and IRS don’t do this sort of undercover work … why are they all standing there chattering when their subject is fleeing them? And with what crime does Thick want to charge D-cubed?
Rene_Simard almost 14 years ago
I just can’t believe it !?!?!
GRR !!!
OldTracy almost 14 years ago
So FOUR other judicial organizations figured this out before Spacy, not counting the local newspapers that told him about this. With so many people looking for work, how does Spacy have a job?
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
Thick’s best move now is to start gibbering in schizophrenic, wander off, then run home, shower, shave, give Tess a pickle-tickle, then show up for work tomorrow and tell Horn Hair that he didn’t find anything. Then, when the other undercover agents claim they saw him, he can say no, you saw some homeless guy who got delusional, you know how those people are …
margueritem almost 14 years ago
ROTFLMELAO!!!!!
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
Just think, if Thick had run a proper investigation, he could have spared himself the embarrassment, and probably busted a real criminal … while the big-name Federal agencies were making fools of themselves on the street.
Vista Bill Raley and Comet™ almost 14 years ago
Hail! Hail! The gang’s all here! Where’s the chief justice?
FLIGHT SUIT almost 14 years ago
The SEC is the Securities and Exchange Commssion.
“Securities,” plural.
Not “Security.”
FLIGHT SUIT almost 14 years ago
How exciting though, that Locher got to draw four different badges, from four different policing agencies, all in one panel! I think each design was borrowed from the hat of one Naperville police officer
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
And Butterfly McCorpse is from, what, the DIA? The NSA? Interpol? MI-5? Just how much lamer will this get?
Steve Bartholomew almost 14 years ago
I think I’ve got it. Since the Gov. hasn’t printed thousand dollar bills for years, 3D is being charged with counterfeiting.
woodworker318 almost 14 years ago
Flight Suit said, 3 minutes ago
The SEC is the Securities and Exchange Commssion.
“Securities,” plural.
Not “Security.” ————————————————– After the way this strip has been going you are letting a little thing like spelling bother you? I think this is the high point of this arc. Now we can start on another ridiculous story.
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
There’s only one thing wrong with your theory, barticle35: it makes sense.
Although you do have a point. D-cubed was giving away the K-notes in a cunning scheme to dispose of the evidence.
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
I suppose–I am making a desperate effort to find something logical here–that D-cubed is being investigated because he’s the one who revealed the criminal activities of his rivals. This action drove down the value of their stocks, which then allowed him to buy a controlling interest in We’re-lying-twerprises. Meanwhile, D-cubed built up his original fortune by “lifting” secret technology from DoD.
The crime? He had insider information on We’re-Lyin. His inside source was Butterfly McCorpse, who he murdered to keep from talking. The hundred million dollar withdrawal was openly done so he could secretly buy depressed We’re-Lyin’ stocks.
His wife? Mrs. Pruneface and Mr.-Rowland-from-my-bank have stolen D-cubed’s fortune and gone to Rio, or Switzerland, or Monaco.
D-cubed will get acquitted at his trial because as Thick knows the local courts coddle criminals. He’ll defend himself with an insanity plea, because only a lunatic would elude the cops by living on the streets and giving away huge sums of money. But he’s now broke and will end up homeless.
Sue Doko is his accomplice. She’ll go to prison and get three squares a day, ha-ha-ha, ho-ho-ha!
FLIGHT SUIT almost 14 years ago
When federal cops are in town pursuing a case, isn’t it normal for them to inform the local police of this fact, kind of as a courtesy?
Fusnr almost 14 years ago
Maybe someone from HUD should have been there for what damage he may have done to their buildings he may have hid out to sleep in that were vacant..
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
As a courtesy,Flight Suit, and to avoid the sort of bungling seen here. But do Thick, Horn Hair and Testicle Chin belong to the Nappingville PD? Maybe they’re a long-lost vaudeville act, or forgotten rivals to the Three Stooges and the Ritz Brothers.
Interesting thing here–the last panel has five people in it. When was the last time the Locher Mess Monster had that many people in one panel?
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
http://www.sec.gov/divisions/enforce/enforcementmanual.pdf
see Section 5.2, “Cooperation With Criminal Authorities.” Yes, the SEC talks to local police when there are parallel investigations. They do admit to “special circumstances,” which I suppose could mean “don’t cooperate with asshats.”
I can’t find anything about the SEC doing undercover work–and why would they? I doubt that D-cubed was hauling around the only copies of his business records with him.
FLIGHT SUIT almost 14 years ago
The SEC’s been in the news a lot, due to the mortgage mess and economic collapse. I’m guessing Locher put them in the story just to make it seem topical.
CyberV almost 14 years ago
…Oy…
And the story just went from stupid to STUPID.
To be fair, faking your death is probably a crime. And there’s the matter of that dead body made to look like him. Unless someone else did that, DDD’s guilty of murder.
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
Now what about Inspector Thompson’s Gazelle of the Yard?
Cyber V, the ME said he couldn’t find a cause of death for Butterfly McCorpse, and the only identification came from Mrs. D’apostrophe. We’ve seen nothing to the contrary. There’s no positive evidence yet that D’cubed was involved in the death. It’s a reasonable suspicion however, and Thick should ask a detective to check it out.
But it would be just like Locher to announce that Thick knew something that the readers never saw, and he’s known all along D-cubed dunnit. “Oh, the special task force learned the facts, you shoulda realized it!”
brine Premium Member almost 14 years ago
Well, that was totally unexpected!!!
btmosley almost 14 years ago
Wow - didn’t see this one coming.
Totally surreal, even for the man who gave us the pig-on-wheels.
Not sure why or how the IRS would be involved; one would think that the Secret Service would instead be concerned about where all the $1000 bills, which have been out of circulation for decades, were coming from. Sorry, Locher, but having the ATF involved instead of the CIA would be a lot more believable. Not that that would really do your plot any good.
And did 3D really fake his own death as someone stated? I think all they had to go by by way of ID was that butterfly tat. No papers or any other identification were found with the body. And why does everyone involved (in the strip) continue to believe that the philanthropic bum is 3D anyway?
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
btmosley, maybe the other agents have credible evidence that they had found D-cubed. Thick doesn’t have it.
Endless days of Thick in a confrontation with the homeless guys, and it ends with the equivalent of a cream pie in the face. And what happens when the patrol that Horn Hair promised shows up? Will D-cubed produce a gun and start plinking away, giving Thick his long-awaited chance to duck and cower?
Did Locher have something else in mind, like a wacky insurrection of the homeless, only to be overruled by someone at TMS? Or has he planned all along to make Thick look like a fool?
mjmsprt40 almost 14 years ago
OK, I was partially wrong yesterday. DT isn’t the only one carrying a badge in sight. Now we have a surplus of badges, each one worn by mavericks in their departments apparently, and not one able to catch a cold much less catch D-Cubed.
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
Hey, Thick! What if those badges are fake and they’re all homeless guys pretending to be cops? Imagine how silly you’ll look if you just let them go and it turns out they pulled a fast one on ya! Arrest them all for interfering with your investigation!
runar almost 14 years ago
The CIA is not legally allowed to operate within the US. Its stateside offices and personnel exist solely to co-ordinate overseas activity (in theory, at least).
The $1000 bill featured Grover Cleveland on the front and the words “One Thousand Dollars” on the back. It was printed as a small-size Federal Reserve Note in 1928, 1934 and 1934A, and a small-size Gold Certificate in 1928 and 1934. As of 30 May 2009, there are 165,372 $1,000 bills still being used.
CougarAllen almost 14 years ago
Where is Sgt. Preston of the Mounted Police? Where is Offissa Bull Pupp? Where is Fearless Fosdick? We seem to be three men short.
-Cougar :{)
Araldite almost 14 years ago
So now we find out that practically every other agency and even the newspapers know more about D-cubed than Tracy and the Napperville police. I just don’t understand Locher,s reason for making Tracy look like a cowardly, bumbling, useless idiot in every story. It’s as if he’s lost touch with the concept of a HERO.
neonleon59 almost 14 years ago
That Fursten has one HUMONGOUS noggin.
JCFremont almost 14 years ago
“Lemming of the B.D.A.”
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
So maybe it *is* a trick on Thick, and while D-cubed gets away the Flab Four take Thick hostage because they’re really (pick one) either part of a well-prepared revolutionary group, or they’re D-cubed’s personal bodyguard, aiding and protecting him as part of their regular jobs. Maybe that patrol is going to arrive just in time to save Thick’s bacon and let him stop some nefarious scheme …
… or maybe that picture of Homeless Guy squatting in an alley, going HO HO HO, HA HA HO was really a self-portrait of Locher laughing at everyone while he trashes Dick Tracy’s reputation.
Dick Locker, the ultimate in DT villains!
OldTracy almost 14 years ago
In keeping with the undercover theme, did anyone realize that Crimestoppers today features McGruff?
flanders22 almost 14 years ago
Yeah but I don’t see Vic from the Shield, Barney Fife, etc.
Dr. Midnight almost 14 years ago
AHA! HA! HA! HA! HO! HO! HA!
JCFremont almost 14 years ago
Huh. Turns out they had to show him their stinking badges after all.
prrdh almost 14 years ago
CougarAllen said, about 1 hour ago
Where is Sgt. Preston of the Mounted Police?…
Sgt. Preston is too competent to waste his time on this kind of nonsense. Dudley Do-Right would be the right man for this job.
…Where is Fearless Fosdick?
Since Fearless was a parody of the original Dick Tracy, I’d say he’s right there in the middle of the first panel.
BTW, the chief should take the Crimestoppers tip when it comes to Slick. He’s certainly no good as a cop; might as well make him the department mascot. And he definitely needs a leash.
Finally, as long as we’re seeing a bunch of undercover agents from agencies that don’t work undercover, why not someone from the FDA, the NTSB, the HSA…
LudwigVonDrake almost 14 years ago
So why did they did let him get away???
SGIBeachbum almost 14 years ago
Badges? We don’t need no steenkin’ badges!
jumbobrain almost 14 years ago
Okay, I have to admit, this is the closest to an interesting surprise this strip has had in a long time. Hopefully it turns into something.
trekkermint almost 14 years ago
very interesting and stupid
billdi Premium Member almost 14 years ago
what goods? and why weeks to get the goods on 3D? just arrest the guy as soon as he hands out a $1000 bill! what were they waiting for? they apparently are just as stupid and incompetent as macspacy. dang, i guess this means macspacy won’t get the tar kicked out of him after all unless the four stooges decide to do it anyway because he’s impeded their “investigation.”
hossblacksilver almost 14 years ago
Heck, why not McGee, NCIS? At least get someone competent there.
Nimblejack almost 14 years ago
It’s taken us three months to get to this point and it still doesn’t make sense. Incredible…just when you think this strip can’t possibly get any worse, it does.
OldTracy almost 14 years ago
Could the “F. B. I.” that Fursten is referring to stand for Football Investigator and his name is Fursten Tenn? Sorry! :)
marvee almost 14 years ago
Exactly how is “everything under control”?
Bill Thompson almost 14 years ago
Two possibilities:
!: They’re meant to be real cops and Locher is showing his usual indifference to real procedures, real laws and common sense.
2: They’re all carrying fake badges as part of a pre-arranged tactic to cover D-cubed’s escape in case he’s in danger of arrest, and we’re supposed to realize that this time all the inconsistencies and idiocies aren’t Locher’s usual indifference to real procedures, real laws and common sense, but are reliable clues that Thick will see and understand–there’s a first time for everything, I guess.
mjmsprt40 almost 14 years ago
Night Gaunt might be partially right.
Personal experience: I came home one morning last year to find the place across the parking lot crawling with US Marshals. Later, I called Carol Stream police to see if I could find out what it was about and they either knew nothing about it or said they didn’t know— take your pick. That was a bit of a surprise since this happened within town limits and this was obviously a large operation with marshals seriously open for business. To this day I can only hazard a guess as to what happened right across the lot from where I live.
Still, you’d think in an operation like the one in the story the feds just might let the locals know if for no other reason than to stop bumbling locals from ruining a federal investigation.
sydney almost 14 years ago
Jumbo, it’s already turned into SOMETHING … Paramount took the ‘idea’ and made a ‘look-a-like’ movie — “Jackass 3-D,” a multi-million dollar hit, while TMS only paid Locher ‘peanuts’ for his ‘Jackass’ 3-D !
countoftowergrove almost 14 years ago
Where’s McGarrett, Five-O?
CougarAllen almost 14 years ago
Prrdh, you didn’t explain why Offissa Bull Pupp is missing! In case anyone’s memory doesn’t stretch back that far, he was the Offissa who kept arresting Krazy Kat for throwing bricks at Ignatz Mouse – possibly the first policeman to appear in the comics as a regular….
-Cougar :{)
Morrow Cummings almost 14 years ago
OK. Macy! Where’s your badge? Macy needs to learn how to properly identify himself as a cop like they did. Maybe a day-old donut folded over and wrapped up in a piece of newsprint will do the trick! Or, a couple of pocketfuls of those G-notes would surely ID him.
Maxine_Viller almost 14 years ago
Say, I wonder what happened to our resident Sunday troll? Did he starve to death because we weren’t feeding him? Or did he, perhaps, change his name…?