For Better or For Worse by Lynn Johnston for February 23, 2024

To relax, which is something they can’t do when at home with kids who need constant attention…

It’s not a Disney Cruise kid.

I went on a cruise with my parents in the late 80s. I was 7 or 8, and I had fun. I think there was a day time kids group thing.

Indeed. That’s the whole point. For myself, I’d not go on an open ocean cruise but I’d not mind island hopping cruise

We wanna go because walk and read and sit in a deck chair is what we wanna do.

And listen to Elly’s constant complaints that there’s nothing to do!

Nowadays, before taking a cruise on one of those floating hotels, you’d better get vaccinated against COVID.

I just read an article about how cruises aren’t as great as the advertisements tell us they are. There are lots of line ups for everything, the food isn’t so great, etc. I’ve never been on one since my husband is afraid of water (like oceans and stuff) and we couldn’t afford it anyway. But the article made me not miss too much what I’ve never gotten to do.

When you’re a kid, having nothing to do is sheer boredom. When you’re a parent, having nothing to do is an absolute dream!

She’s got you there.

I spent many, many years in “Uncle Sam’s Haze Gray ‘Canoe Club’”, just sailing around the oceans. Trust me. Out at sea there is nothing to do but clean, clean, and do maintenance. Plus standing watch with more cleaning. Port Call was usually good though.

Because there’s nothing to do.

April is too smart for that.

The shuffleboard of course…..

You won’t catch me on a cruise ship after 2020. People trapped onboard for a month, running out of food, trapped with two thousand people….no thank you.

I’ve enjoyed trips on more than one sailing ship.

But on a floating city? No thanks.

Nothing to do? That depends on the cruise, and the cruise line. The only real advice i can give is to never take a Margaritaville at Sea cruise. but if you did, you’d be too drunk to notice just how terrible everything is.

My parents went on a cruise for their 25th anniversary. My little brother was 3 and was devastated until they got back.

You had your time together it was called a honeymoon. Now you have kids and it is called a family vacation. You can still get two rooms (they can afford it) and lets face it April will be asleep by 9 pm so the folks can go dancing and drinking and….

No Disney cruise line back then?

i went on a cruise once…joined the Navy

Haven’t seen any cruise ships in 2024, have you? They’re virtually floating amusement parks.

VEERY good question, April. When we went on a cruise the only thing I found interesting to do (when we were at sea) was eat. Boy, did they have the food—imagine – pizza 24 hours a day ! ! ! !

A child will complain there is nothing to do. An adult is happy when there is nothing to do.

They want to do nothing, April. That’s why they’re going.

April will soon see signs at bars and other places such as:

NO CHILDREN ALLOWED

By Order of Managment

April might also see segregated toilets and water fountains, one for grownups and one for children.

River cruises are awesome but ohso pricey. Worth it for me, tho once is enough, since the passenger volume is significantly less. And there is usually constantly changing scenery as compared to larges numbers of people ( one ship can hold up to 8K…. that’s more than the pop. of my town!) and nothing but sea to see..

Try the cruise from Halifax to Boston—-with a stopover in Newport,Rhode Island. I loved seeing the Newport docking—-big ship,teeny tiny docking space

Reminds me of the song Stress by Jim’s Big Ego

But I think I’d really love is to get out by myself On a little tiny island In the middle of the ocean

With just me and a book and a cellular phone And a personal computer in case something came up And I’d eat and I’d drink And I’d run and I’d sleep And I wouldn’t be doing nothing except swim all day

But actually I think it would be really relaxing Just me by myself in the middle of the ocean

And that’s what I’d really love to do more than anything else

Except I’d probably hate it

The first week I do all the side trips, the second week, I sleep most of the time

April doesn’t have to worry. It is not like Elly and John are David and Sharon Schoo, the couple whom at the time this strip was published, took a 9-day vacation and left their minor children at home without any neighbors, housesitters, or family members.

Elly can hire an illegal immigrant to babysit April for pennies. Best of all, John and Elly don’t have to do any FICA withholding.

Uh-oh Elly, April’s calling you out on your BS, again!

If April was older that would be considered talking back to her mother.

If they were going on a riverboat cruise and the Enjos were sending them off, it would be:

Lorne,

Lorne,

Lorne down the liver!

Either that or Rhetta’s brother is being goaded to eat liver & onions!

Good law I should have passed:

CHILDREN SEGREGATION

1.) Restaurant owners will be within their rights to segregate their establishments into two sections; one section for those five and under who scream, drool and throw their food, and the other section for those over the age of five who normally do not.

2.) The “Toddler” section is to be patrolled by a bouncer to prevent any children from escaping into the “Adult” section.

3.) Should the U.S. Supreme Court rule this law unconstitutional, it will be within the rights of restaurant owners to place Supreme Court justices at a table with children under five who scream, drool and throw food.

To walk and read and sit on the deck!

They’d better not take monster kid with them.

Out of the mouths of Babes.

Not quite correct. Cruises these days have activities for kids. I don’t know if they had adults-only cruises back when this strip was new.

Nothing to do on a boat? This strip is certainly dated; cruises today are floating amusement parks.

She could have also said April cannot go because it is dangerous. It is easy for a little kid like her to fall overboard.