Frazz by Jef Mallett for July 06, 2020

I’ve had to deal with a Millie second. Lasts what feels like several minutes if she’s in a high-pitch dander.

When you’ve been baking in the sun for a while, tart lemonade does help. Your mouth puckers up so much that it pulls you eyes open.

Not to mention dumping sugar into good fresh Grapefruit juice counts as a crime.

Also summer is a time to take antihistamines, and some of them react fatally with grapefruit juice.

And people on different medications can’t have grapefruit juice. It changes how effective your medicines are.

When the world hands you grapefruit, make grapefruit-juice-ade.

Though “Grapefruitade” would roll off the tongue quicker than “lemon-juice-ade”.

Apparently that’s everyday now, considering how many people suddenly want to abbreviate everything!

It would be “grapefruitade,” Frazz. “Grapefruit-juice-ade” would be redundant.

Live by the pedantry, die by the pedantry.

Gin, kiddo. Gin…

Lemonade is the king of summer drinks? Since when? I thought Gatorade had that spot.

Maybe they didn’t notice that grapefruit juice is bitter, more than Lemons are sour.

is that bitterer vs sourer? Hurts just to say.

Curiously enough, people will use a spoon to eat half a grapefruit, with – or if brave enough – without sugar, oranges can be eaten in slices or squeezed for the juice, yet lemons only get sliced and dunked in water or tea or other beverages, or squeezed into a glass. Size discrimination? Pity the poor lime.

Fortunately, at least some of the statin drugs are no longer as sensitive to grapefruit. I’m told by my pharmacist, whom I trust implicitly, that I should be okay if I don’t ingest them very close together. Yes-hah! I love grapefruit!

A friend of mine had trained himself to eat lemons whole, like normal people eat oranges. Great party trick. It’s a riot to watch people pucker up just watching him do it.

It isn’t lemon juice ade, so it should be just grapefruitade. Still milliseconds too long, which is why there is limeade.

Neither does lemon juice ade.

I wonder who was the first to make lemonade?

If milliseconds count, why not limeade?

“Just try this Flavor-Ade, and your worries will all be over.” —Jim Jones

And “Grapeade” has already been taken.

you don’t make tom collins with grapefruitade.

Jef Mallett’s Blog Posts

Frazz18 hrs · Eleven years ago (!), I wrote a semi-useful and (if I can say so)(or not; a lot of other people said so) pretty entertaining book about the booming but still offbeat sport of triathlon. There was some how to it, but it was mostly about the why. Specifically, the mental part of the why.

I was going to title it “Three Track Mind,” but thought I’d get clever and name it something a little more cerebral (and I’ll now admit insensitive), a three-fold take on schizophrenia. I don’t recall the publishers putting up a big fight. They were nice, and I was beginning this current phase of my life where I can’t seem to get anything turned in on time. I’m not sure.The book had decent sales and was received well enough for its niche status. I don’t know if the original title would have helped it rise above that niche status or not, but I will say that I wince every time I hear someone struggle to recall or pronounce, or both, “Trizophrenia.” Which is just about every single time someone tries.

Keep it simple, future authors. It must roll off the tongue easily. Take it from someone who knows.

If milliseconds really count, why not LIME-ADE?