Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for July 16, 2019

…Jessica Rabbit without her makeup…

…honeymoon salad: lettuce alone…

…like the Titanic before her, Freida didn’t see the iceberg until it was too late…

… I could have swore I saw that vegetable move…

… it wasn’t what the vegan meant by getting a little head on the couch…

… do women even wear slips anymore?…

… Teresa could call this piece: my eyes are up here, but my head is over there…

…somebody’s about to get a wedgie…

…did you call me, doctor?…

… why should I call you doctor, I’m the surgeon…

What are the most impolite vegetables?

Lettuce turnip and pea.

aboard the Titanic

One of the many stunt doubles from ‘Shoecabbage’ makes a guest appearance.

Lettuce pray.

Pretty roughage, better with creamy Italian..

Heads will roll.

Chair cabbage…word salad.

Quantum Tunneling.

Cabbage, actually.

The first lesson at the Froglandia Zen Center.

Looks like an SCTV episode.

Nothing for it but to make cabbage rolls.

(What’s for tea, mum?)

I see dead people … and I hear a drum roll ending with a cymbal crash … (talk about a head worm) …!

… I can’t do lettuce jokes with a cabbage?…

… that’s part of the joke…

…Ron was so bad at Quidditch that they made him play cabbage instead…

…

… Popeye gave up cabbage for lent…

…now he’s only eating cabbage…

…his arms aren’t stronger but his gas sends Olive out of the room…

…coleslaw something something…

…cabbage patch dolls something something…

…see…that’s why I did lettuce…

Coles law goes like, there is always someone who won’t eat the coleslaw.

https://youtu.be/DNTXbs0R1RU

https://youtu.be/6W1I34Y7cYw

I know! It’s a subliminal advert for that restaurant/bar chain, Lettuce Entertain You! Am I right, Masked Lady?

Follow the bouncing ball…