Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for March 16, 2022

Cheetos Officially Calls Its Orange Dust ‘Cheetle’

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/cheetos-cheetle-dust-popcorn_l_5e1c96f3c5b6640ec3d86e10

A truly lame offering! What better way to celebrate FA’s Fifteenth! (In your face, Beethoven, you only made it to your Ninth!)

The main problem with newspaper comics is the sound they make while they’re being read because this is cattle country and we don’t take kindly to rustlers.

Whoa. Wait. I looked it up. FA’s Fifteenth was actually in December of 2021. I used this age calculator to come up with FA’s “age”:

https://www.calculator.net/age-calculator.html

In your face, Randy_B! For once, I feel cheetle-y proud of myself for making a profound contribution to the comments section.

Most hummingbird nests are 1.5 inches in diameter, roughly the size of a large walnut, ping-pong ball, or golf ball.

The average length of a Cheeto is 1.68 inches.

You know you’re rich when you are able to hire people to dip their fingers in Cheetle and wait for you to lick them.

My wife only likes the crunchy ones.

So quick to start sh!t, we are. The line has been drawn. Cheetle fingers on one side, news print fingers on the other. Just try and take a silly putty print of your digital “art” or digital cheetle, and get back to me.

What do you call a beetle who wanders through Cheetos dust? A Cheetle.

My joke. If anyone else thought of this joke first, I didn’t see it. It was a coincidence. Besides, as a loyal reader of FA, I’ve had plenty of exposure to lameness.

…there are no coincidences…

…everything is a coincidence…

…chee- toes and newsprint fingers…

Care to split some, or just play poker till dawn. Dawn dish detergent will wash away the winnins.

When your local newspaper is printed in another state, and costs more than an Amazon Prime subscription, you have to think about whether it is a value that compares with its cost.

So where does that leave newspaper comics creators? In a Cheetle-free wasteland?

Re the Blog: I think that white dog totally set up its little friend. It knew the other would never clear the hedge.

Family Affair where French is doing Uncle Bill’s laundry.

‘Wow’, Cheetle and lipstick on U.B.’s shirt collar. Still sorting too find Cheetle and lipstick on his underwear… OMG Mr. Bill.,.

I won’t tell you where cheetle comes from on Chester the Cheetah.

Learned a new word today

Like the Queen of England, one can celebrate one’s anniversary whenever they like.A true fifteen year-old would want to be more on point.

I, however, celebrate ‘Frog Applause’ every damn day.

31/08 in the Eisenhower Administration

Sunset yellow FCF colored (Cheetle) fingers on the left, Titanium dioxide colored (powdered doughnut) fingers on the right … mmmmm … a match made only in Froglandia …!

For smell, nothing beats dittoed comics.

You can lick your fingers, and you can lick your cheetle fingers, but you can’t lick Don Cheetle’s fingers. You just aren’t cool enough. Darn Don, doesn’t he know lame is the new cool? So, don your darn cheetle fingers and give Don the cheetle dusted bird, for comic effect, digitally.

“Crispity, crunchity, and oh so good”, or am I thinking of something else?

https://64.media.tumblr.com/5d828e781e24bb84d3ab081db394aea2/60d6db60dac84a75-6f/s640x960/3defcf34d7039869e7e59dad60a5aa869a7c8b3d.png

https://frogapplauseappreciationsociety.tumblr.com/archive

More unwanted caller types:

Push Pollster, Loan Consolidator, You’re A Winner, Heavy Breather, I’m So Lonely, Bathmat Defiler

https://lamefrogapplause.blogspot.com/2022/03/caller-type.html

Spam/scam caller types: Town Hall Inviter, Doctor’s Offices, Clueless Butt Dialings, Breathless Campaigners, Offers to “Enhance” my Anatomy

Bathmat Factory Complaint Form:

1. coltish1

2. March 16, 2022

3. (Title) Bathmat Mold Alarmist

4. (Dept.) Quality & Introspection

5. & 6. (Date & Time) (See above)

7. (Location) Break Room

8. (Incident Detail) 3hourtour reciting Leaves of Grass (sorry, Skipper)

9. (Other Witnesses) Brass Orchid (who was mulling over several clever responses), Randy B (who looked up from his chemistry experiment from time to time), rad-ish (who thought the whole thing bourgeois and boring), painedsmile (trying to relax his face), and Space Captain Cody [G (who was looking away, but secretly listening the whole time).

10. This is the first time I’ve complained about this.

Note: Since I have boundless fondness and admiration for the commentariat, I really wanted to include everybody, but my brained pooped out, and then my fingers did.

Back when newspapers were newspapers, distinctive and individualistic, when broadsheets really were broadsheets and tabloids were considered a lesser species, I preferred my comics in print (actually, in those days, there was no other way). But now, newspapers are mostly lock-step rags, and if they publish comics at all they have been shrunken down to near-illegibility. Times have changed. I now read comics exclusively online, at a number of chosen sites, and can usually magnify the strips if necessary, or view the same strip at an alternate site where it is larger. And so it goes, Sweetie, purveyor of apophthegms….

A Baptist Mat Factory. Play The Beatles Album Let It Be.

I fear The Cult of bad.

The drawings remind me of the comics JG drew! (I do not remember the name of his comic on here, though.)