Herman by Jim Unger for March 17, 2023

Note the use of the past tense.

Himderella, the famous circus juggler, lost track of time and performed his act past midnight. It was a smashing failure.

His name was Gord.

He never wanted to be a smash sensation.

How the Smashing Pumpkins got (earned) their name.

One way to make pumpkin pie.

He should have know something like this would happen…squashed in his prime!

Those pumpkins have reminded surprisingly intact to have squashed him. Heh, heh, aren’t pumpkins considered a type of squash?

Browning wrote: A man’s reach should exceed his grasp. He did.

Know your limits. And sometimes adhere to them.

Juggling 300 pound pumpkins will do that to an older man.

Maybe it’s better to end this way than to juggle one to many nuclear warheads

Until he wasn’t

His successor, The Fat Orange Clown, went into politics after some financial bankruptcies. The Great Pumpkin has still failed to appear despite invitations to do so.

Nothing says “greatest” like holes in the soles of one’s shoes.

It could have been worse… the second best juggler tried to juggle chainsaws

Sounds like the guy who juggled Enron…

WAS being the operative word…..

Operative point here: the tense of the verb.

He shouldn’t have tried juggling while listening to Smashing Pumpkins

I’ll bet that was a really short act!