Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for April 14, 2024

I knew it!

I almost never use a house key. I press a button in the car to open the garage door. Homelink. Most cars have it, I think. It’s worth the trouble to program it.

and it specifically knows if you need the toilet

I just don’t lock my door. Besides he’s outside and it is dark. . . . .

Who among us has not experienced this?

He forgot one thing- when you drop the whole bunch.

Why’d ya haves bottle opener on it?

Is this one of those key parties? (By the way, nice to see he still carries a church key. Although today, a corkscrew probably gets used more.)

How does it really happen?

This is not quite true: all your keys and fob collude to work against you.

These days, I only have one key on my key ring. My house key. My car keys are all keyless fobs and I don’t have an office key.

This is why I only have the key to my front door on my keychain.

This is why I have a little motion sensor light over the keyhole.

Peek-key-boo, I see you.

I wrap the top of the house key with a bit of friction tape. It makes it easy to identify and hold in the coldest weather.

And if there’s more than one set of keys in your pocket, the set you need is always under all the others.

We love our keypad deadbolt. Never even have to think about keys.

Add to this a brain that tells the bladder to go go go! just as soon as it sees the front door.

Just before the Keys all decide to jump out of your hand.

This is sooo true!