Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 24, 2015
March 23, 2015
March 25, 2015
Transcript:
Zebra: I hired a bear to protect my property from the crocs.
Pig: Wow. Bears are so intimidating. Is it a grizzly bear? Black bear? Brown bear?
Killer koala on duty.
Zebra: None of the above.
Pig: You can always hug him if you're scared.
Nah, fair dinkum fellas….Australia is home to 9 of the top ten most venomous snakes in the world, most venomous spider (funnelweb), great big sharks and huge crocodiles. Everything here is lethal. Don’t be fooled by the koala’s cute looks – he’s survived in an extremely hostile environment. Even Mike Tyson wouldn’t cuddle one on his last visit. Think about it……
Hey, Pastis, aren’t koalas marsupials? Also, grizzlies, (Ursus Arctos Horribilis), Kodiak, (Ursus Arctos Middendorffi) and “brown bears” are ALL Ursus Arctos, (brown bears)… so you are being redundant. The main bear families we relate to are Ursus Americanis (black), Ursus Arctos (brown), and Ursus Maritimus (polar).
Two comments::1. I’m glad to see another Zebra Minus Crocs strip; there should be more of these, because Zebra hasn’t has much opportunity to be a real character since the crocs were first introduced.:2. What kind of koala is that — regular or diet?
Here’s a really disgusting thing about Koalas:Over 80% of them have chlamydia! Even though it’s not the same as the human version, would you want to be messing with them?
Koalas are actually dangerous so zebra made a good choice. However, even if this was a nice koala, the crocs would find a way to severely injure themselves.
Rod Gonzalez over 9 years ago
I love today’s strip.
Especially since Rat is NOT in it.
i_am_the_jam over 9 years ago
But they’re very aggressive when they need to be.
Alexander the Good Enough over 9 years ago
And, boy howdy, watch out for those Drop Bears if you ever go to Oz!
Templo S.U.D. over 9 years ago
I was going to ask that. What are they really though?
Constancy over 9 years ago
Koalas would be croc food if they fell out of the blue gum tree.
delpatjr over 9 years ago
Guard duck on strike?
AGED_ENGINEER Premium Member over 9 years ago
Where is Wee Bear?
wiselad over 9 years ago
if we have a dangerous duck, why not a guerrilla koala?
baddawg1989 over 9 years ago
Hullo, Koala neighba. :-)
toto23 over 9 years ago
The problem with koalas is that they sleep 22 hours a day. Makes it hard to guard anything…
oldschool434 over 9 years ago
hiring a koala to protect him from the crocs is like hiring stephan to defend him against a wrongful death lawsuit…..
juicebruce over 9 years ago
Do Crocs know how to read ?
boyfromoz over 9 years ago
Nah, fair dinkum fellas….Australia is home to 9 of the top ten most venomous snakes in the world, most venomous spider (funnelweb), great big sharks and huge crocodiles. Everything here is lethal. Don’t be fooled by the koala’s cute looks – he’s survived in an extremely hostile environment. Even Mike Tyson wouldn’t cuddle one on his last visit. Think about it……
me over 9 years ago
https://www.google.com/search?q=pope+john+paul+ii+koala+picture&espv=2&biw=1517&bih=692&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=kU8RVazSJ4WjgwTbnYII&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAQ&dpr=0.9#imgrc=6U39-4jC-5miM%253A%3Bt8uAPMhfm1dl_M%3Bhttps%253A%252F%252Fc1.staticflickr.com%252F3%252F2219%252F21943206959800b338c9.jpg%3Bhttps%253A%252F%252Fwww.flickr.com%252Fphotos%252F22773430%2540N07%252F2194320695%252F%3B241%3B350
gyroman12345 over 9 years ago
Did Rat go skydiving with his boss yet?
Dave Thorby over 9 years ago
It could be a Naive Inter-Dimensional Commando Koalahttp://static.comicvine.com/uploads/scale_large/2/26751/624153-naive1.jpg
bsox over 9 years ago
Does this mean the crocs are making a comeback!? Also I need more Guard Duck and Mr Snuggles in my life
mike_slmi over 9 years ago
Thanks, Sheldon.
Rwill over 9 years ago
Bloody marsupials…
Digital Frog over 9 years ago
But he had all of the right koalafications!
papabear over 9 years ago
Hey, Pastis, aren’t koalas marsupials? Also, grizzlies, (Ursus Arctos Horribilis), Kodiak, (Ursus Arctos Middendorffi) and “brown bears” are ALL Ursus Arctos, (brown bears)… so you are being redundant. The main bear families we relate to are Ursus Americanis (black), Ursus Arctos (brown), and Ursus Maritimus (polar).
ozed over 9 years ago
Should’ve used a dropbear: http://forums.heroesofnewerth.com/showthread.php?505785-Dropbear-Benzington
sarah413 Premium Member over 9 years ago
Crocs are the bane of our fashion existence. Uggs as well.
Spiny Norman Premium Member over 9 years ago
I want the Crocs!!!
Vet Premium Member over 9 years ago
I am already worried about the koala….this one is armed and dangerous…..I would be wary of the lolly.The hat is just too scary to mention…….
Squoop over 9 years ago
Shouldve hired the duck.
abbybookcase over 9 years ago
guard team —koala bear & care bear
Packratjohn Premium Member over 9 years ago
“That’s no ordinary koala!”
dmattoon Premium Member over 9 years ago
Oh Happy day! Rat’s gone and the crocs are back, well, at least in name. Bring back the CROCS!!!!!!!!!! (Zeeba could hug one of them)
Sherlock Watson over 9 years ago
Two comments::1. I’m glad to see another Zebra Minus Crocs strip; there should be more of these, because Zebra hasn’t has much opportunity to be a real character since the crocs were first introduced.:2. What kind of koala is that — regular or diet?
Robin Wiley Premium Member over 9 years ago
Koalas are NOT bears!https://www.savethekoala.com/about-koalas/interesting-facts
Sisyphos over 9 years ago
Pig demonstrates once again his ignorance (panel 3). Never attempt to hug the Guard Koala. Especially not when it is on duty!You have been warned.
Claire Jordan over 9 years ago
If they get annoyed with you they wrap their arms and legs round you, sink their teeth in and hang on. And they have strange, slitted, blood-red eyes.
1MadHat Premium Member over 9 years ago
Killer Clown Koalas from Planet X-31!!!Run for your lives!!!
Lyons Group, Inc. over 9 years ago
How come he has eyes like Cybil?
Frederick Barnett Premium Member over 9 years ago
Here’s a really disgusting thing about Koalas:Over 80% of them have chlamydia! Even though it’s not the same as the human version, would you want to be messing with them?
Number Three over 9 years ago
One of the Crocs: “Keel that keeler koala!”
xxx
Daeder over 9 years ago
Koalas can actually shred flesh as well as any bear.
drmickeyg over 9 years ago
Could have used a gummy bear – those are really bears, too! ;)
milhouse.vh over 9 years ago
@WiseOrator, it is not in their name. They are called koalas, not “koala bears”.
claire de la lune. over 9 years ago
Will this “killer koala” bear become the new Guard Duck?
connie over 9 years ago
Koalas aren’t bears.
Jon Schutter over 9 years ago
I’d love to see a honey badger for a single panel. No more croc problem.
kaystari Premium Member over 9 years ago
not a bear, fail.
IronFox over 6 years ago
I’m pretty sure that a brown bear and a grizzly bear are the same thing…..
all.flesh.is.temporary over 4 years ago
Koalas are actually dangerous so zebra made a good choice. However, even if this was a nice koala, the crocs would find a way to severely injure themselves.
AustinMains almost 4 years ago
get guard duck
alantain over 1 year ago
Koala’s aren’t bears. And they sleep about 20 hours a day.