Pickles by Brian Crane for July 30, 2020

Whoever the floor belongs to, we can be certain Earl wasn’t sweeping up Opal’s mess…

Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

She just wants to share.

See. There’s your mistake, Earl. You made her chain too long.

Apparently, the kitchen only belongs to the wife. So this must mean the fridge and pantry are off limits to the husband, right? No snacks, ever…

Earl won’t make that mistake again. Sweeping the floor, that is.

Even the cat is giving side eye.

No good deed goes unpunished.

Who paid for it?

Earl is in the perpetual conundrum of “He can’t win he can’t break even and can’t quit the game”

Opal many times in life tis best to just say “Thank – You” and then let go of any other thoughts ;-)

Don’t be upset, Opal. In the divorce you can have the whole damned house. It’ll be worth it not to share with you anymore.

Just like when the kids are bad…it’s you son(daughter)

Someone may be sleeping on HIS sofa tonight!

Eh, hubby says this – doesn’t bother me. My kitchen, his office. Neither has to clean the other’s area.

My long-ago mother-in-law hated getting kitchenware as a gift.

She didn’t like to cook, but had made all the meals for 25 years, most of the time for six people… herself, her husband and 4 sons…

though there were “only” the four of them left, once the two oldest boys got married.

I was still very young, we had no children, and I loved to cook, so at first I didn’t get it.

Till the time she told my father-in-law that they needed a new toaster.

He should have known better, after all those years, with two of their boys still under 20, and living at home….

but he bought her a fancy toaster… for her BIRTHDAY… instead of the expensive perfume he usually gave her.

She called it a “slave present” … never opened the box, and gave it to her oldest son’s wife, cos she had said “Oh, nice.”

I still thought it was a bit over the top…

but a few months later, at the county fair, I saw a booth selling hand-painted ceramic plaques and signs…

There was a selection of cutesy oval ones featuring an old fashioned stove or bean-pot… pre-painted with names…

“Kathy’s Kitchen”, “Jane’s kitchen”, “Melody’s Kitchen” …

not a single ONE that said “Frank’s Kitchen”, or “Steve’s”… or even “OUR Kitchen.”

and a little light bulb turned on in my head.

While I was at it I loaded the dishwasher for you too.

Sad again today no Roscoe but at least the kitty is there .

Fact: every woman I have ever known has referred to the kitchen as “MY kitchen.” Now, that my mean I have women friends of limited outlook or mental capacity, but I see it as a control issue. They also don’t want their husbands poking around and finding where the poison is hidden.

When Nelson’s bad: Did you see what YOUR grandson did?

When Nelson is good: You should see what MY grandson did.

So it’s wrong for Earl to sweep “your” kitchen floor while you read the newspaper, but it’s right for you to tell him to get out of “my” kitchen when you’re making dinner? Honestly, I’m just asking.

Well, that’ll progress to her living room, her dining room, her house..yup, unless you help with the chores, it can be all hers…in the divorce!

Gee, Opal. A lot of women actually consider the kitchen HER kitchen making it their kitchen floor.

advice: never use personal pronouns when describing anything

I think ‘our’ is the proper word, Earl!

Why does he need to be lauded for doing work around their house? Why does he think it makes him special? When did Opal ever come to him and ask for gratitude for doing what needs to be done? Do your share and shut up.

And he probably swept all the debris into the corner and left the broom in the middle of the floor.

“So, Opal… you’re saying I misunderstood you when you shouted ‘Get out of my kitchen!’?!?”

There’s no pleasing the unpleasant.

There is your, mine and our. Always use each correctly.

I have a hunch that I know who/what Opal is going to use to mop the kitchen floor!

The “My” is the wrong word.

I knew whose kitchen it was when she told me to get out of her kitchen.

Go ahead and rearrange the kitchen cabinets and pantry, you will find out exactly who’s kitchen it is.

Maybe if he clarified that she’s the boss and that everything in the house belongs to her (including him) maybe he’d have been okay?

This reminds me of fathers who say they’ll babysit their own children—-GEESH! My Father cleaned and waxed the floors to the music he liked. As a tyke, I’d jump up on the mop and get swished around—what fun.

I’m sure Brian Crane is enjoying how easily it is to generate such a long comment discussion. He may have even made a bet on it.

He’s confused, thinking she spends more time on it.

That was nice of him. She should thank him and shut up.

He lives there. It’s his kitchen too. Why shouldn’t he clean it? He sleeps in the bed. Why shouldn’t he make the bed.

It’s the same as when the dogs/kids are good they’re her dogs/kids, when they’re bad they are YOUR dogs/kids!

He can’t win for losing.

People never happy.