Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for May 31, 2021
Transcript:
Your Guide to Xmas Trees Pig! Old Growth Behemoth Fir Needs a high ceiling. May contain irate Earth Firsters. Longleaf Evershed High maintenance. Denudes & regenerates hourly. Extra-Resinous Balsam A sap fancier's delight. Hard to pry off of car. Hey, my sandwich fell apart. Carniferous Spruce Self-sufficient. Likes children. Will make do with pets. Car Freshener Somewhat pathetic. And it smells fakey. Sandwich Toothpick Extremely pathetic yet undeniably festive.
Etremely oops.