RBION should say that Haumea is the fastest known spinning large object in the solar system. There are likely many other large spinning objects not yet discovered in the outer solar system.
There are several locations in England where giant curvilinear structures have been built with just the right radii to pick up the sound of aircraft engines across the channel. It was said they gave about 10 minutes of warning. Radar made them redundant or at best auxiliary.
Before radio, or even electricity, messages used to be transmitted at high speeds by towers with huge levers attached which acted as semaphore relays. These were actually the original telegraph systems.
Orcas are weird. One minute they are batting a baby seal around like a toy, cruelly beating it to death. Then later you will find one saving a baby seal from drowning, and gently putting it on the shore.
I bet war tubas could be used to pick-up fast approaching wives by wayward husbands.
Any truth to the rumor that Hamea’s core is actually a tight spiral, thrown by the legendary John Elway in mile high stadium?
It broke free of the earth and has been amassing ice vapor and dust as it passes through space.
How did the cavemen survive the asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs?
Social distancing , they stayed 56 million years apart.
An astronomy teacher prepared two boxes filled with joke cards. The first box was filled with asteroids and the second one with comets. He then let one of his students pick a box…The student picked the one with asteroids. He picks one card and read the joke out loud to the class. The class, however, didn’t find the joke funny. Seeing this, the professor made the student pick another card out of the same box. Same thing happened. The confused student looked at his teacher and said,
“Sir, I think there is no funny joke in this asteroid box.”
The teacher then replied,
“Hmmmm..That’s strange. I guess the real joke is in the comets.”
SAME thing here, the real jokes are in the comments. Thanks Stevesilver48, Charliefogwhistle, Turco, Caldonia and Eromlig for all the comments over the days, months, years.
Many of my stories are NSFW, but this one is. You can even tell it to your kids.
A duck walks into a puband orders a pint of lager and a ham sandwich. The pub owner looks at him and says, “But you’re a duck.”
“I see you’re eyes are working” replies the duck.
“And you talk!” exclaims the pub owner.
“I see you’re ears are working” says the duck, “now can I have my beer and my sandwich please?”
“Certainly,” says the pub owner. Sorry about that, it’s just we don’t get many talking ducks in this pub. What are you doing round this way?"
“I’m working on the building site across the road” explains the duck.
So the duck drinks his beer, eats his sandwich and leaves. This continues for about 2 weeks.
Then one day the circus comes to town.
The ringleader of the circus comes into the pub and the pub owner says to him;. “You’re with the circus aren’t you? I know this duck that would be just brilliant in your circus, he talks, drinks beer and everything!”
“Sounds marvellous” says the ringleader, “get him to give me a call.”
So the next day, the duck comes into the pub.The pub owner says, “Hey Mr Duck. I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money!”
“Yeah?” says the duck, “Sounds great, where is it?”
“At the circus” says the pub owner.
“The circus?” the duck enquires.
“That’s right” replies the pub owner.
“The circus? That place with the big tent? With all the animals? With the big canvas roof with the hole in the middle?”
“That’s right!” says the pub owner.
The duck looks confused. “What the heck do they want with a plasterer?”
We’ll, the duck joke might just be too tame, so here’s one more for the road.
A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately.
When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is full and bushy. “Are you the landlord?” she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.
“Actually, no” he replies.
“I need to speak to him, can you get him for me?” she asks, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.
“I’m afraid I can’t,” breathes the barman, clearly aroused. Is there anything else I can do for you?"
“Yes there is. I need you to give him a message” she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.
“Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room.”
Haumea, Eris, MakeMake, Sedna, Orcus, are examples of why Pluto was demoted. If Pluto retained its classification as a planet, these and other Kuiper Belt objects should also be classified as planets.
I wonder where those war tubas were used. You’d think that, with all the war movies and documentaries I’ve seen in my 80 years, I would have seen them somewhere.
eromlig almost 3 years ago
I’m (temporarily at least) jumping themes, and picking up the old golf bag once more:
Two guys are getting ready to go golfing together. “I’m going to buy a dozen balls before we hit the links; would you like me to pick up any for you?”
“Naah, I’m good,” his buddy says. “I’ve got a ball.”
“You’ve got A ball? Just one??”
“It’s a lucky ball; it’s all I need,” he responds.
“But what if you lose it?”
“I can’t.”
“Oh, that’s crazy!” his friend exclaims. What about the pond?”
“It floats.”
“What if you hit it into the woods?”
“It beeps.”
“What about the dark woods?”
“It glows in the dark.”
The friend just shakes his head in amazement. “That’s incredible! Where did you get a ball like that?”
“I found it.”
pearlsbs almost 3 years ago
RBION should say that Haumea is the fastest known spinning large object in the solar system. There are likely many other large spinning objects not yet discovered in the outer solar system.
Caldonia almost 3 years ago
How do you make a Kleenex dance?
Put a little boogie in it.
Templo S.U.D. almost 3 years ago
um… when was Humea discovered?
Caldonia almost 3 years ago
It’s wild because orcas and other whales aren’t always friends with each other. Maybe they just needed rope?
Teto85 Premium Member almost 3 years ago
There are several locations in England where giant curvilinear structures have been built with just the right radii to pick up the sound of aircraft engines across the channel. It was said they gave about 10 minutes of warning. Radar made them redundant or at best auxiliary.
monkeysky almost 3 years ago
Before radio, or even electricity, messages used to be transmitted at high speeds by towers with huge levers attached which acted as semaphore relays. These were actually the original telegraph systems.
JDP_Huntington Beach almost 3 years ago
Orcas are weird. One minute they are batting a baby seal around like a toy, cruelly beating it to death. Then later you will find one saving a baby seal from drowning, and gently putting it on the shore.
I bet war tubas could be used to pick-up fast approaching wives by wayward husbands.
Any truth to the rumor that Hamea’s core is actually a tight spiral, thrown by the legendary John Elway in mile high stadium?
It broke free of the earth and has been amassing ice vapor and dust as it passes through space.
How did the cavemen survive the asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs?
Social distancing , they stayed 56 million years apart.
An astronomy teacher prepared two boxes filled with joke cards. The first box was filled with asteroids and the second one with comets. He then let one of his students pick a box…The student picked the one with asteroids. He picks one card and read the joke out loud to the class. The class, however, didn’t find the joke funny. Seeing this, the professor made the student pick another card out of the same box. Same thing happened. The confused student looked at his teacher and said,
“Sir, I think there is no funny joke in this asteroid box.”
The teacher then replied,
“Hmmmm..That’s strange. I guess the real joke is in the comets.”
SAME thing here, the real jokes are in the comments. Thanks Stevesilver48, Charliefogwhistle, Turco, Caldonia and Eromlig for all the comments over the days, months, years.
Charlie Fogwhistle almost 3 years ago
Many of my stories are NSFW, but this one is. You can even tell it to your kids.
A duck walks into a puband orders a pint of lager and a ham sandwich. The pub owner looks at him and says, “But you’re a duck.”
“I see you’re eyes are working” replies the duck.
“And you talk!” exclaims the pub owner.
“I see you’re ears are working” says the duck, “now can I have my beer and my sandwich please?”
“Certainly,” says the pub owner. Sorry about that, it’s just we don’t get many talking ducks in this pub. What are you doing round this way?"
“I’m working on the building site across the road” explains the duck.
So the duck drinks his beer, eats his sandwich and leaves. This continues for about 2 weeks.
Then one day the circus comes to town.
The ringleader of the circus comes into the pub and the pub owner says to him;. “You’re with the circus aren’t you? I know this duck that would be just brilliant in your circus, he talks, drinks beer and everything!”
“Sounds marvellous” says the ringleader, “get him to give me a call.”
So the next day, the duck comes into the pub.The pub owner says, “Hey Mr Duck. I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money!”
“Yeah?” says the duck, “Sounds great, where is it?”
“At the circus” says the pub owner.
“The circus?” the duck enquires.
“That’s right” replies the pub owner.
“The circus? That place with the big tent? With all the animals? With the big canvas roof with the hole in the middle?”
“That’s right!” says the pub owner.
The duck looks confused. “What the heck do they want with a plasterer?”
Until next time.
Charlie Fogwhistle almost 3 years ago
We’ll, the duck joke might just be too tame, so here’s one more for the road.
A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately.
When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is full and bushy. “Are you the landlord?” she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.
“Actually, no” he replies.
“I need to speak to him, can you get him for me?” she asks, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.
“I’m afraid I can’t,” breathes the barman, clearly aroused. Is there anything else I can do for you?"
“Yes there is. I need you to give him a message” she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.“Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room.”
Until next time.
Huckleberry Hiroshima almost 3 years ago
Haumea, you me ah… Netflix and chill? ~ Astronomers in a “medical” marijuana state
Take care, may anal expressive tuba player Scott “I’ve Also Got A Harley With No Mufflers” Blapord be with you, and gesundheit.
NeedaChuckle Premium Member almost 3 years ago
I’ve seen a lot of pictures of the war tubas. Some were truly humungus! I wonder if they worked?
dv1093 almost 3 years ago
On Haumea, I’d weigh 2,360 pounds.
mindjob almost 3 years ago
Those war tubas sounded really good with the war trumpets, war trombones and war saxophones.
FassEddie almost 3 years ago
Believe it or not!
Jogger2 almost 3 years ago
Haumea, Eris, MakeMake, Sedna, Orcus, are examples of why Pluto was demoted. If Pluto retained its classification as a planet, these and other Kuiper Belt objects should also be classified as planets.
schaefer jim almost 3 years ago
After the war they were used as hearing aids for profoundly deaf persons.
J. R. M. almost 3 years ago
Being that far from the sun, I doubt there’s much difference between day and night on Haumea.
Charlie Fogwhistle almost 3 years ago
For more information about sound detection,
https://rarehistoricalphotos.com/aircraft-detection-radar-1917-1940/
billwilliam20 almost 3 years ago
how do you make golden soup (mind out of the gutter please)
by adding 24 carrots
Bilan almost 3 years ago
I just have to try that war tuba out at a Pink Floyd concert!
Caeruleancentaur almost 3 years ago
I wonder where those war tubas were used. You’d think that, with all the war movies and documentaries I’ve seen in my 80 years, I would have seen them somewhere.
ex window inspector almost 3 years ago
that one is amazing…that one is incredible….that one is fiction
Copy-&-Paste almost 3 years ago
Believe NOT