That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for December 18, 2024

Difficult pose to avoid placing both cheeks on the rocks.

/// A youth stares out to sea. Friends are gone

as he sprawls on a rock— nothing on.

Works by Henry Scott Tuke

won’t bring shame or rebuke;

they’re collected by Sir Elton John.

This painting by Henry Tuke/

Deserves a resounding Rebuke /

It’s a pic of a lad/

who is like to be bad/

Perhaps ‘cause his dad is a duke.

What to wear for that all-over tan.

" I wonder why they all shrieked and ran away. I only asked if they had seen my dingy?

The lad needs to be lying down if Tuke wants his painting to be the centerfold in the next issue of Playgirl.

He’ll have trouble later, explaining to his Mom how he caught crabs.

That awkward moment when Colin thought the mermaid was interested in him.

Amazon fails again.

I remember that commercial “l ship my pants”

“Maybe if I bring my crabs to the beach, they’ll return to their natural environment.”

“The barefoot boy with cheeks of tan” …

I love that scene from “the girl next door” where he standing naked in the street in front of her. He says it’s not funny and she replies, “It’s kinda funny.”

Call him overly sensitive if you want, but Oliver had no intention of going skinny-dipping while there was a jellyfish warning posted. Those things sting!

Times were tough before the invention of elastic.

After his dip in the ocean, Johnny refused to face the painter, proclaiming, “It was the water! It was cold!”

While many people pee in the ocean, Jason looked out towards the horizon with his bold plan of upping the ante.

“No, no! It’s ’get your rocks off…”

Makes “siting on the rocks” take on a whole new meeting.

The ship called “Abercrombie & Fich”?