Baby Blues by Rick Kirkman and Jerry Scott for September 17, 2023

Oh my god!

You have some free time? I can’t let you be comfortable, I’ll find something for you to do or at least complain about the first thing that pops into my head.

My wife has been complaining about loose boards on our fence, but the boards are all on the neighbor’s side. He knows my wife thinks it’s overdue for a new fence but he thinks it’s okay. I’m staying out of it. I can always use my arthritis as an excuse why I can’t do anything about it.

There is a kid at school who likes to smash your potato chips. His name is…I better not say, he might hit me.

She could have rounded up Zoe, Hammie and Wren to come sit with you and keep you company.

Walked right into that one didn’t ya…..

Remember screwdrivers that you had to turn by hand?

Don’t you just hate people who take things unnecessarily literally?

She just thinks guys wearing tool belts are sexy.

Poor Darryl.

She should really plop a big kiss on his nose while she’s at it!!

You asked for it Darryl!

He’s got his hat on. He might as well be outside.

He walked right into that. I’m hoping he’s been lolling all day and it was about time for him to do some work and that Wanda isn’t THAT mean.

Watch football on a Saturday?Yeah,right Darryl,who does that?

Oh the horrors of the ignored ’Honey Do" list. At least Darryl got to enjoy a minute or two of relaxing leisure on his day off.

That didn’t “work” out well for Darryl.

Put another log on the fire.

Cook me up some bacon and some beans.

And go out to the car and change the tyre.

Wash my socks and sew my old blue jeans.

Come on, baby, you can fill my pipe,

And then go fetch my slippers.

And boil me up another pot of tea.

Then put another log on the fire, babe,

And come and tell me why you’re leaving me.

Now don’t I let you wash the car on Sunday?

Don’t I warn you when you’re gettin fat?

Ain’t I a-gonna take you fishin’ with me someday?

Well, a man can’t love a woman more than that.

Ain’t I always nice to your kid sister?

Don’t I take her driving every night?

So, sit here at my feet ‘cause I like you when you’re sweet,

And you know it ain’t feminine to fight.

By Tompall Glaser

Funny

That’s not a nice thing to do, Wanda.

Ask a silly question, get a silly answer.

A few nights ago, some neighborhood huskies smashed through multiple fences (as in, multiple families’ yards), and then played in my parents’ backyard, chasing wild rabbits and drinking out of the hot tub. They left before anyone woke up, but we have a security camera in our backyard (in case of bears or coyotes), so that’s how we discovered why the fence broke. On the plus side, the neighbor was really nice when we met him to talk about it (and the video was hilarious).

Oh, and here’s some soiled laundry for YOU, Wanda.

One must be ready to do a project and not have it thrusted on them unless it’s an emergency…..

Gawd forbid that Daryl should be allowed a little quiet time watching the tube. How dare he enjoy a few moments.

thought he was smart enuf to see that one comin’!

YSHKB!

(youshouldhaveknownbetter)

Darryl, you got just what you deserve buddy. The devil is in the details you know.

That’s what he gets for calling her “sweetie”…

“I don’t get a break you don’t get a break”

I had to do all of his fekin chores as well as mine, raising 3 kids and taking care of the house while he’s off partying all the time.. I have NO pity for a guy who lays about letting his wife take up the slack. And if you think I’m being harsh I haven’t opened the entire can of worms.

She should remind him “Looking good! … You’re looking good to me.”

You’ve been had Darryl.

Wanda, you find time to sit in a hot bathtub with a glass of wine and a scented candle. Why can’t Darryl have a few moments to relax, too?

Haha! (＾▽＾)