Baby Blues by Rick Kirkman and Jerry Scott for May 11, 2024

This Is More Treat Than Trick

It is Halloween night, and a group of teenagers is buying a lot of toilet paper.

Me: “Is this for some kind of trick for a house that doesn’t give out good candies?”

Teenager: “What? Oh! Crap! I didn’t even think how this would look! No, this is for my younger brother.”

Me: “What do you mean?”

The teen calls over a boy who I didn’t notice. He looks about seven years old, and he has his arm in a cast, so I am assuming the bone is broken.

Teenager: “This is my little brother. He was sad about having a broken arm at Halloween, but we’re going to make him a mummy and use the paper as extensions of his cast so it all looks the same.”

Me: “Oh, that’s so cool! But the TP might not be strong enough for that. You might be better off using medical bandages.”

Teenager: “Oh! We saw those, but they were a bit expensive.”

Me: “I think they’re on discount, and it’ll match the color of the cast better! Aisle twelve — go get some.”

The teenagers rushed off to go fetch some, I applied the “discount” (which was my staff discount), and the teens rushed off to turn the little guy into a terrifying mummy. I hope they got lots of candy!

NOT my story.

Time to practice your knuckleball.

Are these quality heckles or more beginner level?

Siblings.

Zoe can sure dish it out but is she able to take it?

Hey! Just be glad he’s not Lucy!

We used to say “We want a pitcher, not an underwear stitcher!”

“The kid” looks like he’s about two seconds from clobbering her.

Doesn’t Darryl mean to say, “Don’t heckle your brother in the morning”??

Ham better get used to a woman heckling him in his bed.

funny

Zoe, lets not forget:

I’ve seen better arms on a beanbag chair!

This pitcher is pac-man…walka, walka, walka, walka!

The last time he found the plate twice in a row was at dinner!

Here strike zone, strike zone strike zone. Come here boy.

The plate hasn’t moved in 100 years and he still can’t find it!

We should arrange a funeral for your dead arm!

Check the roster, you might be left-handed!

I’ve seen better pitchers at a Tupperware party!

I’ve seen more heat in an EZ-Bake oven!

Hey pitch! Why do you keep hitting our bats?

I’ve seen better curves on a square!

A little guy should definitely NOT be throwing fastballs. In fact, I’m not sure Hammie is old enough to be pitching at all. Ruin his arm.

Not helping Zoe. But then when do you ever?

Go stand in the corner Zoe.

Wow, check out the shnoz on this guy!

Hey, she might be onto something. By the time he gets to the real thing, he’ll be completely ignoring them.

Love the belly pitcher line…we used that all the time 60 years ago. Good times, good times!

Which is completely opposite of her head and rear end.

And that is why I never liked nor participated in sports. Call it what it is, Heckling is just another way to bully someone. And no, it doesn’t build character.

Those that can’t do, heckle those who can.