How dare you make a joke about us’en therapist ! ! We do not tolerate racist jokes like that. I am going to chick-fila and drown my sorrows in fantastic sandwiches
This joke is so old I can’t help but wonder if there’s a layer of irony I’m missing; or perhaps it’s a super secret coded message to some one in the author’s or artist’s family or circle of friends? If WYSIWYG, I’m kind of stunned. B.C. rarely misses for me, and never by this much.
How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb: undetermined number
1 to pray to have the light restored1 to blame liberals for darkness even though old bulb bought under previous administration1 to bash gays and Jews gratituously1 to cut taxes on overseas light bulb supplier1 to go online and buy cheapest bulb and not pay sales tax1 to hire illegal alien to do work1 to hire spin doctor to cover up the deal 1 to declare mission accomplished even though new bulb doesn’t work1 to blame liberals again for darkness
The whole point IS that it’s an old and not too funny joke. The point is that the joke was old and not too funny when cavemen were around. Another cartoonist – maybe the one at “Non Sequitur” – would have shown two fish transitioning to air-breathers and written the joke the exact same way; the point being that that it was old and not too funny even before the cavemen. It is not lazy!
How many Asatruar does it take to change a light bulb? Nine – one to hold the bulb, and eight to drink until the room spins.
How many freemasons, and specially how much time does it take to change a lightbulb?2 to complain that the light doesn’t work.1 to pass the problem to either another committee, the Temple Board or the Master of the Lodge.3 to do a study on light in the Lodge.2 to check out the types of lights the Knights of Columbus use.3 to argue about it.5 to plan a fund-raising dinner to raise money for the bulb.2 to complain that “that’s not the way we did it before.”1 to borrow a ladder, donate the bulb and install it.1 to order the brass memorial plate and have it inscribed.
How many Wiccans take to change a light bulb? That is what candles are for…
How many Gardernians does it take to change a light bulb? Sorry, that’s a Third Degree secret.
How many Ceremonial Magicians does it take change a light bulb. None they are the center of their universe..
How many Frost “School of Wicca” Witches does it take to change a light bulb?“Just you! That’s right, YOU! And for only $195 we’ll send you ourcomplete “Witches Magic Power of Light Bulb Changing Course”with real knowledge that you can apply this to ANY light bulb ANYwhere!Listen to the testimony of a young couple from Wisconsin who…"
How many Macumba (brazilian counterpart of vodoo) practicioners does it take to change a light bulb?Two – one babalorisha (priest) just to yell that the lighbulb is burned and a Yawo (novice) to change the bulb…
How many Charismatics? Five. One to change the bulb and four to pray against the spirit of darkness.
How many Pentecostals? CHANGE???
How many members of an established Bible-teaching church that is over 20 years old does it take to change a light bulb? Ten. One to actually change the bulb, and nine to say how much they liked the old one.
How many United Methodists does it take to change a light bulb? This statement was issued: “If in your own journey you have found that a light bulb works for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb (or light source, or non-dark resource), and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service.”
How many professional wrestling fans? None, because “Rasslin” fans know the darkness is only a work.
How many mathematicians? Four. One to be sure the Texas Instrument-83 calculator has fresh batteries. One to determine which formula to use. One to change the bulb. And one to explain why it is important that you understand how you got the bulb into the socket, even if it does not come on.
How many male chauvinists pigs does it take to change a light bulb? None. Let the little woman cook in the dark.
How many _____ (fill in the blank with a student from the college or university you would most like to insult) does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but he gets 3 hours credit for it.
Hey!!!! I resemble that remark. I teach Math at a community college. I don’t take any offense, but I do know several of my past students would not have changed the light bulb unless they received extra credit for it.
Even old jokes (and well-known ones) are often new to someone. If they don’t get retold at some point, they will die out. (Some of them may deserve to die out, but that also is a subjective issue.) Besides, the light bulb jokes are often used as a springboard (as was evidenced here) to come up with new variations.
AGED_ENGINEER Premium Member over 12 years ago
Heh!
NE1956 over 12 years ago
So that’s how old that joke is. Cave men got humor. Hmmm, go figger.
BigChiefDesoto over 12 years ago
How would YOU like to work seven days a week, 52 weeks a year without ever getting a day off?
Superfrog over 12 years ago
KGB agents: 3. two to hold it still and one to apply the electrodes.
xsintricks over 12 years ago
Labrador Retrievers: “Let me! Let me!”
caller49 over 12 years ago
Ok, if you can come up with a fresh strip everyday then why don’t you do it?
Scroogeman over 12 years ago
lame joke.
richardkel over 12 years ago
None. A psychiatrist would say that the light bulb would have to change itself for it to be truly beneficial.
stewfull over 12 years ago
How dare you make a joke about us’en therapist ! ! We do not tolerate racist jokes like that. I am going to chick-fila and drown my sorrows in fantastic sandwiches
rshive over 12 years ago
Philosophers – two. One to change the bulb and another to prove it exists.
richardkel over 12 years ago
Are you Dillio, under an assumed name? Enjoy it for what it is.
georgelcsmith over 12 years ago
Libertarians? None! The market will do it.
jmo328 over 12 years ago
Liberals, ten, one to hold the bulb and nine to run in circles spinning the ladder
justalurkr over 12 years ago
Systems engineers: None. That’s a hardware failure.
justalurkr over 12 years ago
This joke is so old I can’t help but wonder if there’s a layer of irony I’m missing; or perhaps it’s a super secret coded message to some one in the author’s or artist’s family or circle of friends? If WYSIWYG, I’m kind of stunned. B.C. rarely misses for me, and never by this much.
gobblingup Premium Member over 12 years ago
Comic commenters: 21 (so far). One to change the light bulb, and 20 to make amusing yet snarky remarks on how he did it.
WW2 Marine Veteran over 12 years ago
I don’t get it. I must be getting older than I realized.
skycop over 12 years ago
Enjoy the puns—self-appointed “critics,” not so much.
Casey Southards over 12 years ago
That is so Cheech and Chong.
Chewiek9 over 12 years ago
How many Chihuahua’s does it take to screw in a light bulb?Two-but the hard part’s getting them in.
Hunter7 over 12 years ago
West Coast Lotus Land: all of them get confused and decide bulb was a typo and go for a Bud Party! … no one cares they’re in the dark.
The Life I Draw Upon over 12 years ago
Dim bulb.
VirginiaCityLady over 12 years ago
Thanks to everyone for making my Sunday morning here in the Bay Area in CA!!! This comic plus your comments are priceless!!
rockngolfer over 12 years ago
How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb: undetermined number
1 to pray to have the light restored1 to blame liberals for darkness even though old bulb bought under previous administration1 to bash gays and Jews gratituously1 to cut taxes on overseas light bulb supplier1 to go online and buy cheapest bulb and not pay sales tax1 to hire illegal alien to do work1 to hire spin doctor to cover up the deal 1 to declare mission accomplished even though new bulb doesn’t work1 to blame liberals again for darkness
pawpawbear over 12 years ago
Rednecks: 4
2 to go outside and fight over it, 1 to write a country song about it, and 1 to holler at his wife to get up on the rickety chair and change it.
pawpawbear over 12 years ago
Virginians: 4
1 to do it and 3 to sit on the front porch and rock and reminisce about how good the old was.
bmckee over 12 years ago
The whole point IS that it’s an old and not too funny joke. The point is that the joke was old and not too funny when cavemen were around. Another cartoonist – maybe the one at “Non Sequitur” – would have shown two fish transitioning to air-breathers and written the joke the exact same way; the point being that that it was old and not too funny even before the cavemen. It is not lazy!
Mitchtheone over 12 years ago
How many Asatruar does it take to change a light bulb? Nine – one to hold the bulb, and eight to drink until the room spins.
How many freemasons, and specially how much time does it take to change a lightbulb?2 to complain that the light doesn’t work.1 to pass the problem to either another committee, the Temple Board or the Master of the Lodge.3 to do a study on light in the Lodge.2 to check out the types of lights the Knights of Columbus use.3 to argue about it.5 to plan a fund-raising dinner to raise money for the bulb.2 to complain that “that’s not the way we did it before.”1 to borrow a ladder, donate the bulb and install it.1 to order the brass memorial plate and have it inscribed.
How many Wiccans take to change a light bulb? That is what candles are for…
How many Gardernians does it take to change a light bulb? Sorry, that’s a Third Degree secret.
How many Ceremonial Magicians does it take change a light bulb. None they are the center of their universe..
How many Frost “School of Wicca” Witches does it take to change a light bulb?“Just you! That’s right, YOU! And for only $195 we’ll send you ourcomplete “Witches Magic Power of Light Bulb Changing Course”with real knowledge that you can apply this to ANY light bulb ANYwhere!Listen to the testimony of a young couple from Wisconsin who…"How many Macumba (brazilian counterpart of vodoo) practicioners does it take to change a light bulb?Two – one babalorisha (priest) just to yell that the lighbulb is burned and a Yawo (novice) to change the bulb…
iced tea over 12 years ago
That’s what I say,too: GROAN
=)
camapa233 Premium Member over 12 years ago
How many Charismatics? Five. One to change the bulb and four to pray against the spirit of darkness.
How many Pentecostals? CHANGE???
How many members of an established Bible-teaching church that is over 20 years old does it take to change a light bulb? Ten. One to actually change the bulb, and nine to say how much they liked the old one.
How many United Methodists does it take to change a light bulb? This statement was issued: “If in your own journey you have found that a light bulb works for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb (or light source, or non-dark resource), and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service.”
camapa233 Premium Member over 12 years ago
How many professional wrestling fans? None, because “Rasslin” fans know the darkness is only a work.
How many mathematicians? Four. One to be sure the Texas Instrument-83 calculator has fresh batteries. One to determine which formula to use. One to change the bulb. And one to explain why it is important that you understand how you got the bulb into the socket, even if it does not come on.
camapa233 Premium Member over 12 years ago
How many male chauvinists pigs does it take to change a light bulb? None. Let the little woman cook in the dark.
How many _____ (fill in the blank with a student from the college or university you would most like to insult) does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but he gets 3 hours credit for it.
richardkel over 12 years ago
Hey!!!! I resemble that remark. I teach Math at a community college. I don’t take any offense, but I do know several of my past students would not have changed the light bulb unless they received extra credit for it.
HeidiTentee over 12 years ago
How many giraffes does it take to screw in a light bulb? At least two, but I just want to know how they got into the bulb in the first place.
rgasparotto Premium Member over 12 years ago
Sad to see a strip re-use an old joke hoping that the millions of readers who read it haven’t heard the joke before…
gocomicsmember over 12 years ago
Even old jokes (and well-known ones) are often new to someone. If they don’t get retold at some point, they will die out. (Some of them may deserve to die out, but that also is a subjective issue.) Besides, the light bulb jokes are often used as a springboard (as was evidenced here) to come up with new variations.