Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 08, 2013

Goat, you might want to let Pig finish his thought before you jump to conclusions.

Would have thought something else than her dying from just saying “passed”.

“My grandmother’s eating a dirt sandwich. No, she’s not dead. She’s a pig.”

My state wild pigs are an invasive species. Don’t even need a license. Pig care to swing by? Don’t worry that giant mound of marinade, the knives, or empty freezer space. Of course your safe here.

The shotgun? I thought you might want to go skeet shooting.

Mr. Pastis will tell you: Get your own strip!

I am fascinated with imaginings of Pig’s mom, dad, and new-driver grandmother. Will we ever meet them? What do they think of their son/grandson? Or are they as “innocent” as he is? FAMILY REUNION!

“She’s in heaven…….because now she can drive again!”

The last pig I saw driving was stopped for having his tail light out and was told to “FIX IT!”

Is she still dead?

I knew I was never meant to drive when I got two speeding tickets…on my written exam!!

What does the yellow light mean?

….unless one is from the South, where almost every utterance is shortened or abbreviated, we say ‘passed’ with only one meaning. Check out the video posted by the hilarous Jeanne Robertson, a former Miss North Carolina, doing a stand up routine which illustrates this point.

Loved this strip. I hate the euphemisms that are used instead of just saying someone died. Death is part of life. Trying to muddle language never helps anyone.

So close, and yet so far from the steps to Driving Heaven….

Well my great Uncle Doug passed………………………………….gas

That could be good news or bad news, depending on the results of releasing Grandma on an unsuspecting world.

I was thinking more in the lines of Grandma passed gas. Seems more plausible

Reminds me of Kevin James’ phone number rhythm routine: > Five five five… six……. teen forty-one. >> Dude! I already wrote the six! I made the dash too close, I can’t shimmy the one in there now!

Pig’s been living with Rat for too long.

Stay off the roads! Grandma’s driving!!!

Anyone else miss the crocs? These play on words are getting really old.

No point wasting your breath there, Goat.

Way to go, Pig’s Grandmother!

LOL xxx

Oh, Pig…

‘Corporal Nobbs is sick, sir,’ ‘Oh, I know that.’ ‘I mean off sick, sir.’ ‘Not his granny’s funeral this time?‘ ’Nossir.’ ‘How many’s he had this year, by the way?‘ ’Seven, sir.’ ‘Very odd family, the Nobbses.’ ‘Yessir.’

Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

“Grandma passed the bar! She’s actually sober today!”

“Grandma walked into a bar today. After her nose heals, she’s going to get her eyes tested.”

he drew this in 1985, just look at the phone cord.

Excerpt from Vicar of Dibley a day after Owen the dirty farmer french kissed the vicar:

*

Owen: Is this a filling from your tooth?Vicar: Yes, thank you.(Owen hands it over): I’d have returned it sooner, but I only just passed it.

*

Laugh till I cry every time!

If that Pig isn’t careful he could find himself orphaned.

America, land of the creepy euphemism ..