Over the Hedge by T Lewis and Michael Fry for October 21, 2014

The whole “hug” thing gives me the willies. I have suffered from PTSD for nearly half a century now and still the only people who can hug me without setting off a reaction are my wife and any young children. Reactions are worse than having the flu.

A childhood of constant bullying has made me wary of any compliments, high-fives, offers of assistance, etc. I feel Verne’s pain.

Aww! Hammy is just being his sweet, quirky self! I don’t mind the hugs so much, but when they start trying to kiss on me, I get away! I’ve been telling relatives I haven’t seen in years “I have a sore throat! Careful!” for a while now! I want my dance space!

It’s all part of the Hollywood lifestyle — insincere shows of affection that are ALL about ME, as opposed to the display of mutual goodwill that etiquette requests (i.e., a handshake.) If you want to see a very funny take on the Hollywood / European greet (the double-cheek air kiss), try to catch Matt Smith’s Dr. Who trying to get it right. Very funny, especially for those of us who really don’t care for the sham “affection”!

Note to Hammy: When a nerve is rubbed raw, it just times some alone time to heal.

I need one of those this week, and it’s only Tuesday…..