Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 15, 2016

Rat will run a blackmail scheme out of the confessional.

Someone had better fumigate the church — there’s a rat in it!

thank goodness I belong to a lay ministry church

If you can call such an organisation a church. It’s not The Church. I’m not sure how confession works in protestant organisations.

I have a friend who did that. I’d say he was a far better priest than Rat will ever be. Also expected the first wedding ceremony he conducted wouldn’t last and he was right.

It’s a very bad idea.

Yeah, this is why the Catholic Church doesn’t allow priests to be ordained online or over the phone, or even in the mail for that matter.

Hmm…today’s “Pot-Shots” is kind of related.

I have an online ordination. I’ve never used it, nor do I ever even give it much thought. It means about as much to me as the effort it took to get it.

Hum…….. that is one way to collar a Rat :-0

Hunter S Thompson received his Doctorate from Universal Life Church. It is an excellent institution. I submitted my doctoral proposal to ULC, and they immediately offered to waive their normal, stringent requirements, based on the strength of my proposal, and for a slight fee, would have granted my Doctorate of Humane Letters.

Vicious. Bigoted. Grasping. Yep. He’ll fit right in.

Did somebody sneeze?

I’ve heard it said that clergy do more than lay people.

Rat is a SubGenius.

Poor, poor altar boys.

We’re f****d.

I didn’t know that Rat liked kids.

(Whaaat? Too soon? )

This is terrible. Rat a priest? Next thing you know, they’ll be letting sex offenders be ordained as – oh wait…

We have an ex used car salesman who started his own church. Just bought a 3 million dollar resort to have “services”!

@cdward: In New Orleans, at LSU Hospital, (before) people with (nondenominational) ordinations, have used their parking privileges for a nice parking spot downtown, where parking is at a premium, to use non-hospital business. That was before hurricane Katrina, and I haven’t been to NO since.

I have seen people with the placards at Houston Medical center for parking to go to local businesses, the Medical Center is near the Arts Museum District, and again, parking is at a premium in downtown Houston.

I actually considered getting the TX placard when I was going for chemo a few years ago, but that really is a stretch to call it clergy visitation, and I did not do so. Most of the clerical spots were usually full anyway in the areas closest to my Drs.

Oh, nooooooooooooooooooooo

I really hope they pick him to give the invocation at the inauguration next month.

Are rodents at mega-churches still as poor as church mice?

Welcome brother Rat

Who remembers a show called Northern Exposure? Chris Stevens became a minister after answering an ad in Rolling Stone.

Everybody say, “Never give a sucker an even break, Rat.”

I’m guessing communion will be beer and pretzels at Rat’s Church.

I’ve seen it all now. And I’m not sure I wanted to…

xxx

Lucifer is a fallen Angel, and Rat is a fallen priest!

If Rat’s in, it most surely is The Church of God the Utterly Indifferent.

It’s usually not like Goat to leap to conclusions, but I guess in Rat’s case we can safely make an exception….

The communion wine is now filled with brewskis.

Well, considering the kinds of people who became Pope…