Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for October 22, 2018

“I’m yelling at them to feel better! I DON’T CARE IF THEY HEAR ME OR NOT!!”

Please donate, now, to the American Campaign to Eliminate Deafness in Pine Cones, or ACEDiPC.

My pine cones can hear you!

The pine cones are not what they seem

You must sign the pine cones.

Conifer, juniper, sitting on the hill. Gin!

Pineal gland

The Seat of the Soul

And quit tromping on the needles! What did conifers ever do to you?

“I collected them. I can do as I please with them.”

That made the jowly man jolly and he turned his verbal assault on to the little girl.

That’s why they’re pine cones and not pine ears.

Be careful what you say in a cornfield.

Wasn’t Jowly Man a song on the Jimmy Buffett album, Last Mango in Paris?

In the pines, in the pines / Where the sun never shines / And you shiver when the Jowly winds blow ….

I have every right to yell at them!

They were supposed to plight my troth to the girl of my dreams when I threw them at her.

THEY FAILED!!!!

If a jowly man yells in the forest and there are no pine cones (or little girls) to hear him, does he

still make a sound?

Land of the glass pinecones

Their seeds are made of rhinestones

The squirrels never scatter them

They know what rhinestone seeds portend

They smash on the grass when the wind blows

The splinters fly throughout the land

And pierce the eye of every man

Land of the glass pinecones

The eye now sees what the tree knows

The splinters burn, but then we learn

That when we spend we have to bend

It’s all a part of nature’s plan

.

Lyrics from: human-sexual-response/in-a-roman-mood/land-of-the-glass-pinecones

I shall not be able to rest until someone can tell me the title of the book from which those two little wenches read! I must have more of the adventures of the Jowly Man and the Pinecones! Does it end badly? Who else hears his yelling? And what is their backstory?

I may never look at a pinecone in quite the same, innocent, way again!