Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for November 03, 2018

I love the feathers in your glasses, a touch of class for the masses.

Please check your weapon’s at the door…

There is a pill for this condition, but the side effects are numerous … including a reptilian forked tongue ….

Are you going to wear your Halloween costume all week, Sarah?

“Human cement” has, in the past, referred to cementum, the calcified substance on the root of a human tooth. It’s associated with Sharpey fibers, cementicles, and cemental spurs. I will certainly not reject human cement, since it’s part of what keeps my teeth anchored in my head.

Apropos of the season, candy corn is the devil’s earwax.

Her vanity was baroque, with gold-plated faucets.

Horse Drink…A Bowl of Horse Feathered Soup…You Can Lead a Horse To Water by a Carrot On A Stick, Dangling Above and In Front of Him. Or A Whiskey Water Instead of The Carrot, on A Monster You Could Create.

There he saw Fatima layin’ on a zebra skin rug with…

“Rings on her fingers and

Bells on her toes and a bone in her nose ho, ho."

There she was, friends, lyin’ there in all her radiant

Beauty, eating on a raisin, grape, apricot, pomegranate,

Bowl of chittlin’s, two bananas, and three Hershey bars

.

Ray Stevens

You’re so vain. I’ll bet you thought this comic was about you.

Two Birds Eye Views

It makes me a little uneasy, that nose ornament and the word ‘stretched’ in the same comic.

Won’t Miss Abby’s mother be surprised to see how her daughter contrived to ruin her 5th grade portrait?

Denim eyes and temple curls, what is this mask you wear? Mona Lisa smirk belies the bruised butter corset of your interment. What rosy sanguine optics have you conjured, do song birds sing, do caged ears hear? It’s true without gravity, you could not fly, so when, pray tell, will you fulfill, that look that lingers in your eye?

Cupid missed her heart, now she only loves the smell of you.

Surfs Up…stay cemented to your board…go spear fishing as the birds fly…don’t take a horse drink of ocean water… don’t let the swimming stretch off and show your vanity…you too MS. PENNY.

I generally don’t care for facial piercings, but I must say that your Golden Arrow allusion to the old radio hero is almost as alluring as your painfully tiny corseted waist. On the other hand, your babblings seem a tad incoherent. But maybe that’s just my lame wit….

That darn human cement! Curse it.