Shoe by Gary Brookins and Susie MacNelly for November 01, 2019

I think you got some wires crossed Biz.

A friend said his was once set off by his lawn mower.

You mean it doesn’t change channels on your TV?

With my pacemaker, artificial knee and hearing aids I’m becoming the geriatric Bionic Woman.

Maybe you could work it over in Los Vegas. Try and see if walking by all those one-arm- bandits you could get them to cash out?

“Every time Catherine revved up the microwave, I’d piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour or so.”

My friend with a pacemaker has to not just avoid the body scanner at airports, but endure every invasive manual check the TSA has in their books. Heart patients are very dangerous.

The ceiling fan keeps starting and stopping.

Just so long as it doesn’t interfere with the Internet. . .

This is the sort of thing we have to look forward to as our houses get ‘smarter’.

Bwahahahaha!:o}

I have cochlears I feel his/her pain. I only fly as a last resort

I need one that works like Viagra.