Herman by Jim Unger for April 26, 2020

You haven’t died yet

The older you get, the wiser you get, but that doesn’t apply to everyone: I can even name names.

You get cake. yay!

My mother turns 90 today.

My aunt said that you you are 62, you look forward to retirement, but when you are 82, there is nothing to look forward to.

Better think of something quick before setting the cake on fire.

As you get older there are more things you forget. So there’s plenty of new things to learn (all over again).

Never pass a rest area, never trust a fart, and… that third rule of being over 50.

Well, you get to say “Survived another one!”

There is a good line in the first Indiana Jones movie: “It’s not the years; it’s the mileage.”

Will not come up!

It’s a bitter/sweet experience ……some days you feel like a nut, some days you don’t…..HEY! Where’s my Almond Joy?

Getting older is better than the alternative

1. Unlimited ice cream.

2. You can say anything you want to anyone you see.

3. Groping nurses.

4. Call of Duty. All day.

5. Stacks and stacks of comic books.

Need I go on?

The day one stops having birthdays will be the living end.

You got another free trip around the sun!

You don’t have to go get your own cake, for one thing…

Most get “too soon old and too late smart”.

I”m surprised she can stand the heat to hold the cake that long!