Herman by Jim Unger for August 22, 2020

I just noticed the missing Hermans are back.

Better hurry they’re having an open bar at reception

He doesn’t like going to weddings or can’t stand her sister.

Challenge accepted!

His paint brush looks as if it came from a child’s paint box.

Maye he should take on a 40’ by 4’ mural project. Then he would be safe from anything but meals and evening tv for months. Of course, by the time he finished it – bending, stooping, kneeling – he’d have a lot in common with Victor Hugo’s unique character, Quasimodo [the 1939 version]

Alternatively, your sister-in-law and her new husband can live with you.

I prefer funerals…one less drunk.

You’ve heard of the Anti-Christ. This is the Anti-Bob Ross.

he should sand the fence first perhaps with a very small piece of sand paper, then comes the primer and the base coats then to colour coat then the top coat followed by the sealer coat. No point in doing a rush job with that large of a brush

He’s taking his time ….he couldn’t care less about the wedding…

Is that a 000 Ermine brush he is using?

Planned incompetence: which is why I am exempt from loading the dishwasher or clothes washer.

Bummer! Say. I’ll bet the fence could use a second coat!

I don’t do weddings or funerals – if I can possibly avoid them. Weddings are more depressing but, at my age, funerals are more frequent.

“Tom Sawyer: All Grown Up”

A frayed tooth pick would be even slower.

Good for .. ah .. oh, poor you.

At this rate you might be able to make the reception, for their granddaughter.

BOTH.

Herman! You’re awake!!! JOY!!!

Sweet!