Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 23, 2021

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    BE THIS GUY  over 3 years ago

    He may get the job if it’s for a shaving cream tester.

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    BasilBruce  over 3 years ago

    Is that his way of saying “In the crapper”?

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    Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Hoping that all this Covid mess will end, on my way to what has been my dream since I was 18 (now I’m 63): crossing the USA from coast to coast on the trail of Kerouac.

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    Templo S.U.D.  over 3 years ago

    got that right, Rat (good try, Pig)

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    wiatr  over 3 years ago

    I hope I will still see myself in the bathroom mirror in five years.

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    Concretionist  over 3 years ago

    At my last job interview, which was odd in several ways, but that’s another story, I was asked this one. I said the first thing that popped into my head: “I’ll be retired by then.” (I worked there for one day short of 1 year, and then I did in fact quit… and am retired).

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    Opus Croakus  over 3 years ago

    I’m always tempted to say “Queen of my own island”.

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    syzygy47  over 3 years ago

    If I get hired, and the workplace jibes with the rumours I’ve been hearing, crazed lone gunman?

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    ronaldspence  over 3 years ago

    Anywhere but here, any time but now, anything but this!

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    Gent  over 3 years ago

    Maybe the literalati can helps Pig get a literalary job.

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    hariseldon59  over 3 years ago

    The questionnaire does provide a reflection of Pig’s thoughts

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    Doug K  over 3 years ago

    … as the star character in the greatest comic ever.

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    Walrus Gumbo Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Pig is too logical to be in Upper Management!

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    Major Matt Mason Premium Member over 3 years ago

    A reflective personality.

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    iggyman  over 3 years ago

    No reflection on his personality though!

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    Sanspareil  over 3 years ago

    Had that question, told the interviewer that because of the incredible changes in software and hardware, that is an impossible question to answer!

    got the job 2 days later!

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    Breadboard  over 3 years ago

    Well I don’t know where I’ll be until I get my crystal Ball repaired and retuned ;-)

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    MayCauseBurns  over 3 years ago

    Being a mirror tester is a job I really see myself doing.

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    Troglodyte  over 3 years ago

    Honest answers, though…and totally believable coming from Pig!

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    Geophyzz  over 3 years ago

    But it is important to make them laugh. The job questionnaire read, “Do you have any physical limitations?” So I paraphrased the original Superman opening, “I am slower than a speeding bullet, less powerful than a locomotive, and cannot leap tall buildings in a single bound!” On my first day, my supervisor said, “I didn’t know we were hiring.”

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    zeexenon  over 3 years ago

    First time I met Richard Notebaert he said Ameritech’s Chairman and CEO and he was right.

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    SusieB  over 3 years ago

    God, how I I used to hate that inane question during job interviews. You have to come up with some BS answer. Meanwhile, in my head I’m thinking “I hope to have won the lottery so I don’t have to work at all!”

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    Goat from PBS  over 3 years ago

    He’s not wrong.

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    JamieLee Premium Member over 3 years ago

    I was asked that question in an interview and replied ‘I see myself in your job.’ I didn’t get the job. Too much of a threat I guess.

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    Arav727  over 3 years ago

    This is not a good start

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    Jeffin Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Bad luck if he breaks it.

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    Totalloser Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Where do you see yourself in 5 years? A retired lottery winner

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    david_42  over 3 years ago

    “The job I’ll be doing in five years involves technology that doesn’t exist today.”

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    FassEddie  over 3 years ago

    It’s a dumb question.

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    Mr. Snuffles  over 3 years ago

    If my phone is turned off I can see myself in it. So technically I can see myself in five years at an executive office in their company, or at Hawaii.

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    Zebrastripes  over 3 years ago

    PIG isn’t exactly an aggressive job seeker….

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    Ellis97  over 3 years ago

    I see myself a step closer to being the animator I dream of becoming.

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    zodismoon  over 3 years ago

    Now what is the answer the job people really want?

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    Walt Tuttle  over 3 years ago

    A joke that I love:

    “Where do you see yourself in five years?”

    “I think my greatest weakness is that I don’t listen.”

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    nosirrom  over 3 years ago

    At another company making a lot more money!

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    rpmurray  over 3 years ago

    I guess they’re expecting people to lie on the application if they won’t accept an honest answer.

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    WCraft Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Asking other people that question…

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    KEA  over 3 years ago

    so… honesty is not always the best policy (or, taking things too literally is not a good idea)

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    CaveCat87  over 3 years ago

    I’ve heard that question so many times before and even I know not to take it that literally.

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    DCBakerEsq  over 3 years ago

    I’m still not convinced that guy in the mirror is actually me. I’m pretty sure I’m much more handsome.

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    ImDaRealAni  over 3 years ago

    Answering questions about myself is hard. So I usually say something in the realms of joking.

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    l3i7l  over 3 years ago

    Hmmm. I guess I should have taken that fortune telling class in college.

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    petermerck  over 3 years ago

    On disability from a work related injury.

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    Pgalden1 Premium Member over 3 years ago

    ;)

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    willie_mctell  over 3 years ago

    With any luck, still alive.

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    wmchere  over 3 years ago

    barroom mirror

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    comics-terri  over 3 years ago

    i’m retiring in august 2022. when i go my self-evaluation and i’m asked to put down goals, it’s tough. make it till august 2022 – how do you put that down using “words that work” ?!

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    christelisbetty  over 3 years ago

    Five years ago, did anyone see themselves in the middle of a pandemic ? (Other than those who worked on the plans that were ignored and/or discarded.)

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    Sisyphos  over 3 years ago

    Some employers actually like ironic honesty. Stay strong, Pig….

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    StarBeak  over 3 years ago

    Other possible answers: “Hopefully alive” “Working here” “In every reflection I cross by” =3

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    Ukko wilko  over 3 years ago

    I’d hire him. I like literalists.

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    PBS1!  almost 3 years ago

    HAHAHAHA

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