Tarzan by Edgar Rice Burroughs for July 05, 2024

She is another “phlegm” fatale.

Old Tomos had been battling rumors for years that his forbearers had been interbreeding with the frogmen on the sly.

Another one who needs to be put over a knee. Or a darn good breakfast. One or the other….

Here we go again.

What did I tell you! Queenie is a drop-dead gorgeous white woman who likes to wear a lot of jewels and not much else. Who woulda thunk Africa would have so many tribes of white people ruled by beautiful, scantily-clad white women? And since it seems that her subjects are mostly ugly old men, I doubt she’ll be offing such a handsome specimen as our hero any time soon.

I think I read this one already. Several times.

Die? You silly old goat. She gots other plans for him.

Will we ever have an adventure in which Tarzan finds Africans in Africa? Or were the white newspapers not ready for that.

Tarzan will say he’s just looking for his buddy Valthor.

That gnarly face, that withered fist looks familiar. Looks like alligator poop?

Time for a bed chamber court session.

Hey Tomos, don’t forget to mention that this guy was about to kill that same queen.

Sheesh , get over yourself lady .

I don’t think this queen is as glamorous as the usual queens Tarzan meetz. Maybe because she isn’t a blonde? She even looks kind of old.

How many bets it really that steenky old goat Tomos who is really plotting to kills the queen?

“Why so vindictive? Perhaps he can be… … … … useful…”

Why is it that all smokin’-hot-but-crazy queens of lost African civilizations go for the bare midriff look? Not that I’m complaining, mind you… ;-)

Not so fast Tomos, I will have my way with this bronze-skinned savage first! He will kneel before me and I will give him a face full of….well, you know. I can’t wait until blue-haired, blonde-eyed Jahn faces off in the arena against three lesbian dwarfs armed to the teeth!

“First Lady Truman, will you bow or curtsy to the queen when you meet?”

“No.”

“Is that because you are the wife of the president?”

“It is because I am an American and we have no queen.”