Drabble by Kevin Fagan for August 31, 2021

The duck, um, excuse me, rare South American parrot knows more about hardware than Norman.

Lots of “experts” out there.

Loser boy go to a trade school

Considering a lot of the “help” at the big box home stores, that’s pretty much how it works…

You’re lucky if someone can stop what they are doing and help you find something in these hardware stores.

The next day……..

Well, he is as dumb as a bag of hammers.

If he hangs out in an aisle with a group of other aproned staff, dissing other staff in the earshot of customers, and gives a blank look when a customer asks a question, and he will fit right in at our local Home Depot.

Norm will fit right in with the rest of the “experts” at the big box hardware stores…..

The key response is “Sorry this is not my department “ use that and collect your pay check.

One of the first things you learn is who to go to when you don’t know the answer. And then where to go if you can’t find that person.

No one likes a wise quacker.

I’ve gotten to where I don’t accept an offer of help because the person (a Norm) will just start looking around aimlessly like I was doing and waste my time because I’m too polite to say, “forget it.”

Norm’s lucky he has a job, and they’ll keep him since they’re desperate. Why else do you think they hired him?

And the answer to that is, “So what do you know about being a ranger?” Got to start somewhere.

He’ll be like Alfie in that episode of Bluey where he saves the birthday party and the day.

He reminds me of Francis in Momma:)

As if Ralph knew anything about being a Park Ranger when he changed jobs recently.

Ralph’s a fine one to talk, but he’s missing the bigger picture, Norm has a job.

That won’t be the helpful hardware store.

Bob with the Zing!

Y’all saying you can’t get help at these big box stores must be in California. Here is Alabama we get plenty of help. Last time I asked a guy where something way (they had moved things around) he didn’t just tell me what aisle it was in, he took me there.

It’s a Southern Thing: https://www.youtube.com/c/ItsaSouthernThing

Ask me…..what idiot hired me.

Who said the secret word for the duck to show up in the first place?

The hardware stores aren’t good but they are better than Walmart or Target. They must get paid extra to hide out and avoid customers. That didn’t happen when stores were locally owned. They met you at the door.

As usual, in one of his rare appearances, Bob makes an astute observation. Attention should be paid to Bob. He is a deep and clear thinker. He is the Melville of fowldom.