Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for December 29, 2021

  1. Onion news1186.article
    Randy B Premium Member almost 3 years ago

    If you were riding behind him on his motorcycle, you both should have been wearing helmets.

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  2. Onion news1186.article
    Randy B Premium Member almost 3 years ago

    Consider the aerial stem tuber of Anredera cordifolia, the heartleaf Madeira vine:

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CbUX2SWUcAAQ0Kq?format=jpg&name=small

    A potted version:   https://davesgarden.com/guides/pf/showimage/323858/

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  3. Bren suit
    FLIGHT SUIT  almost 3 years ago

    My eyes are down here, ladies.

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    Mad-ge Dish Soap  almost 3 years ago

    His hairy nose was included.

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  5. Duck1275
    Brass Orchid Premium Member almost 3 years ago

    Those profile pics are very important when using social media dating apps.

    Including tubers in your photo MAY give the wrong impression.

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    Mad-ge Dish Soap  almost 3 years ago

    My coffees clouds and I will talk bald spots.

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  7. Oldwolfcookoff
    The Old Wolf  almost 3 years ago

    I’m sorry, you cannot talk to the zoo because the lion is busy…

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    Zebrastripes  almost 3 years ago

    Sooo, I had to keep telling this guy, my eyes are up here! He was so short the top of his head was creating a glare! He must have had 7 hairs combed to the side. His hands looked like root tubers…all fat and stubby! I was repulsed by the dirt under his filthy fingernails. Never again will I go out on a blind date!

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  9. Colt2
    coltish1  almost 3 years ago

    Out in the lobby at the Home, Garden, and Speed Dating Convention.

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  10. Skipper
    3hourtour Premium Member almost 3 years ago

    …NBC getting around the censors in 1958…

    …stems and tubers and bald spots oh my…

    …it is better than taking to the hand…

    …it’s not a tuber…

    …and so baseball caps for non-baseball players were born…

    …one bad stem in a bowl pic should not make you quit…

    …but after a thousand in a photo shoot …

    …that’s another matter…

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    Howard'sMyHero  almost 3 years ago

    Spent my whole life searching for my inner tuber …!

    (Whoomp, there it is)

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  12. Pirate63
    Linguist  almost 3 years ago

    I once knew someone who had a bald spot around their root tuber…

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  13. Sea chapel
    6turtle9  almost 3 years ago

    Phone booth confessions used to be a private hush hush affair. Now we can’t get people to shut up.

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  14. Td  2
    Rotifer HEATHEN POTATO WE KNEW YE WELL Thalweg Premium Member almost 3 years ago

    If the bald spot was cloven you’re doing it wrong.

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    Ninette  almost 3 years ago

    How could it be that a woman had a conversation with a man’s bald spot? Was she supine? Was he prone? Was he conversing with her bald spot?

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  16. Thinker
    Sisyphos  almost 3 years ago

    Snippets of Truthiness overheard near a local public phone bank. (Do such things exist anymore? I used to able to find a phone bank in the big local airport, and some of the phones even worked!) Banal factoids of the daily life of the Froglandian woman of leisure….

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  17. Agent gates
    Radish the wordsmith  almost 3 years ago

    Tubby the Tuber, famous 1930’s cartoon star.

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    Mad-ge Dish Soap  almost 3 years ago

    The bald spot jokingly said to the hair and roots line,

    We really want to get away from the bed head. Wanna compare hair in my bunk bed?

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  19. Screenshot 20220517 145611
    Mad-ge Dish Soap  almost 3 years ago

    After a bowl haircut, the news became the weather report.

    A man talking to his date on the hot steamy day, was reported saying, it’s so hot I should fry bacon on my bald spot.

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  20. Skipper
    3hourtour Premium Member almost 3 years ago

    …this is the trouble with eavesdropping…

    …not only do you get incomplete information…

    …you only get tidbits to go on…

    …that is why the Froglandia Bathmat Company constantly monitors your conversations…

    …our app is always running even if it’s off…

    …with our nanotechnology…

    …you don’t even have to have your phone with you…

    …because we are part of you…

    …we want what’s best for you…

    ….not what Mom or Dad or what the hubby might want…

    …we heard you ask about the new James Bond movie…

    …then ask….

    …is that a gun in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?…

    …worried ?…

    …don’t be…

    …we lie all the time…

    …see…

    …we just did…

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  21. Sea chapel
    6turtle9  almost 3 years ago

    I don’t think I’ll be taking Tuber again anytime soon. My driver was nice enough, but he was a wild driver and never had more than three eyes on the road.

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  22. Thinker
    Sisyphos  almost 3 years ago

    Day 2. Still chatting, ladies?

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  23. Agent gates
    Radish the wordsmith  almost 3 years ago

    You took a fine time to leave me Lucille…

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    Zebrastripes  almost 3 years ago

    HAPPY NEW YEAR TO “T” and the wonderful gang!

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  25. Screenshot 20220517 145611
    Mad-ge Dish Soap  almost 3 years ago

    Seems he slept w/bubble gum.

    Yep stuck to his head of hair.

    Cut it out and put shoe shine on the bald spot.

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  26. Sea chapel
    6turtle9  almost 3 years ago

    One ringy-dingy, two ringy-dingy, three ringy-dingy… will a new comic appear before the ball drops and the plumage firewerks pop pop pops?

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  27. Sea chapel
    6turtle9  almost 3 years ago

    92 to you Howard…

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