There once was a Dane knamed Knut/ a moody, irascible brute/ who , unlike all the rest/ wore a bulletproof vest/ even when they all swore not to shoot../// Poor Knur was completely dismayed/ for he found himself cruelly betrayed/ when his very best friend/ brought his woes to an end/ by means of of a hand grenade..
“Here’s the deal. We tell our wives that the fish hide during the day while we’re drinkin’. So, we’re gonna’ go fishing at night. Then sneak into town and go drinkin’”.
I told him to fish or cut bait//or he won’t get a thing on his plate//he’s freeloaded for years//he’s a pain in the rear//My wife’s brother is getting the gate!
“…well I, had to get up before sunrise, chop the wood, milk the cows, feed the chickens, then walk 10 miles to school, barefoot, up hill, in a blizzard…”
“I tell you brother, it’s just a fact of life with women! You can’t hardly live with ‘em, but if you shoot ’em you’re automatically the number one suspect!”
In Denmark, I’m told, folks are jolly/ it’s the U.N. says so – that’s not folly/ both of these Danes, my dear/ exude damned little cheer./ you could even call them “melancholy”..
I’m telling you, Ernesto, all the children are telling the same joke : “Why do Ernesto’s thumbs always stink?” They they hook their thumbs in their armpits and say “Well, I’ll tell ya…..” just like you do.
“No, that ain’t how it works at all, Gunder. You put one thumb up, and then I put one thumb up, and that means we’re giving that there motion picture two thumbs up.”
and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. So far 5 works, by this artist, have been used here.
BE THIS GUY over 2 years ago
“Technically it isn’t cheating. Your wife and I thought you were dead when you didn’t come home for lunch.”
rmremail over 2 years ago
Lighten up, Jerry. It was a joke. Nobody thinks your sweater makes you look like a liberal.
rmremail over 2 years ago
Gimme your car keys, Jake. I can tell you’ve been sampling the moonshine.
Say What Now‽ Premium Member over 2 years ago
“Now you know Lucas, the IRS does not take Bitcoin.”
rmremail over 2 years ago
Hillbillies at work.
Solstice*1947 over 2 years ago
/// Gunnar’s cousin, Knud, is a curmudgeon.
Always seething and in a high dudgeon.
Now they’re Two Old Men Sitting
in the Shadow, unwitting
that one’s head will soon meet with a bludgeon.
/// Gunnar’d lent to Knud two cords of wood.
Its return, he assumed, understood.
So when Knud still resisted,
this time Gunnar insisted.
Knud hissed, “You’ll get it… you’ll get it good!”
Solstice*1947 over 2 years ago
Haiku:
— Unreasonably
harboring long-held secrets.
Not enough whitewash.
Bilan over 2 years ago
Only one more season, Luke. This year we’ll make enough on the harvest so I’ll be able to buy an ox.
ronaldspence over 2 years ago
Do you ever have that “unfresh” feeling Horace?
Call me Ishmael over 2 years ago
There once was a Dane knamed Knut/ a moody, irascible brute/ who , unlike all the rest/ wore a bulletproof vest/ even when they all swore not to shoot../// Poor Knur was completely dismayed/ for he found himself cruelly betrayed/ when his very best friend/ brought his woes to an end/ by means of of a hand grenade..
Kind&Kinder over 2 years ago
One of the great classics.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOYZX5404gE&t=6s
Jayalexander over 2 years ago
“Here’s the deal. We tell our wives that the fish hide during the day while we’re drinkin’. So, we’re gonna’ go fishing at night. Then sneak into town and go drinkin’”.
bethramrz2 over 2 years ago
I told him to fish or cut bait//or he won’t get a thing on his plate//he’s freeloaded for years//he’s a pain in the rear//My wife’s brother is getting the gate!
P51Strega over 2 years ago
♫ Old Friends ♪ Old friends ♫ sat on the park bench like bookends ♪
Paul Simon
gopher gofer over 2 years ago
now that you’ve sprained your neck, hans, greta is even less impressed with that unicycle of yours there…
pcolli over 2 years ago
“I’m 42, have a good job and am looking for a man to love for the rest of my life.”
P51Strega over 2 years ago
“…well I, had to get up before sunrise, chop the wood, milk the cows, feed the chickens, then walk 10 miles to school, barefoot, up hill, in a blizzard…”
Egrayjames over 2 years ago
“I tell you brother, it’s just a fact of life with women! You can’t hardly live with ‘em, but if you shoot ’em you’re automatically the number one suspect!”
Call me Ishmael over 2 years ago
In Denmark, I’m told, folks are jolly/ it’s the U.N. says so – that’s not folly/ both of these Danes, my dear/ exude damned little cheer./ you could even call them “melancholy”..
Econ01 over 2 years ago
Reminds me of the gradeschool joke, Why do farmers have green thumbs…
Reader over 2 years ago
I swear Karl, by the time I talked all those women into joining me in the spa, there just wasn’t any room left for you.
Honorable Mention In The Banjo Toss Premium Member over 2 years ago
“You can stare all day at your imaginary newspaper, but it won’t make the news you want.”
Buzzworld over 2 years ago
“Put ’er there Jake”
“No way. You just spit in your hand.”
wincoach Premium Member over 2 years ago
Jake, just because I married your ex-wife and your kids took my last name, doesn’t mean we still can’t be friends.
aerotica69 over 2 years ago
I’m telling you, Ernesto, all the children are telling the same joke : “Why do Ernesto’s thumbs always stink?” They they hook their thumbs in their armpits and say “Well, I’ll tell ya…..” just like you do.
Linguist over 2 years ago
" Look, Arn, for the last time, I’m telling you he lost fair and square! "
Another Take over 2 years ago
BLIND ERNIE: INSULT ME, WILL YA? PUTCHER FACE OVER HERE! I’LL GIVE A RIGHT AND A LEFT! AND THEN ANOTHER RIGHT!
prrdh over 2 years ago
“And that’s how I got whiplash…watching ’em jiggle like this…”
carlostercero over 2 years ago
I don’t get it.
The Wolf In Your Midst over 2 years ago
“No, that ain’t how it works at all, Gunder. You put one thumb up, and then I put one thumb up, and that means we’re giving that there motion picture two thumbs up.”
davanden over 2 years ago
What does this mean?
MuddyUSA Premium Member over 2 years ago
Man holding vest: I gave up on Agnes. All she wants is sex and more sex! Man with his hand out: So can I date her?
Calvins Brother over 2 years ago
“Ok son, it’s time we talked about how babies are made.”
mabrndt Premium Member over 2 years ago
Two fishermen conversing or Two old men sitting in the shadow:
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Carl_Bloch_-_En_Samtale_mellem_to_Fiskere_(1880).jpg
has info and links that point to more info about this roughly B4 paper size painting.
Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image at
https://thatispricelessblog.com/2022/02/masterpiece-2883
and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. So far 5 works, by this artist, have been used here.
https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2019/11/25?comments=visible
has the prior (my blog comment here links include the artist info URLs in my comment there).
KEA over 2 years ago
Okay. Today’s new learning… didn’t know what being “catfished” meant
Ken Holman Premium Member over 2 years ago
But at least I kept one of my thumbs … they do come in handy after all.
Paul Read Premium Member over 2 years ago
I didn’t get “catfished” either — here’s the Urban Dictionary explanation: https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=catfished
SteveR405 over 2 years ago
There’s a good Norwegian bachelor joke somewhere in here, but only Garrison Keillor can tell it fore sure.
Helen Ferrieux over 2 years ago
Ok, Piet, so you bragged….but what did they say when they actually SAW it?
gcarlson over 2 years ago
“You expect me to believe that fish was so big that pulling on your line gave you whiplash?”
Running Buffalo Premium Member over 2 years ago
Well … shoot! There went the bird in the hand.
Solstice*1947 over 2 years ago
“Be reasonable, Valdemar, we’re fishermen. How are we going to catch anything if you keep cutting up our fishnets to make stockings?”