Last Kiss by John Lustig for April 01, 2022

Her: “How about a joke making fun of the fact that you are totally clueless? And girl-friend-less?”

Is it April foo dog already?

Weighty puns

I see a slap in his future.

At least He didn’t say " I’ve seen better looking knees on a Horse " ( Yes I have ) !

Body shaming is cruel.

another banned topic…been married three times

you think you’ve got more, but trust me, you’ll be getting a lot less.

I was told once that I was too ‘big’ to date. But it was no April Fool. I did appreciate the honesty though.

Ah, April Tools’ Day already. (And no the third word is not a misprint.)

My wife is very sensitive about her weight (she’s working out and it’s no longer an issue) but doesn’t hesitate to talk about mine.

GAL: I thought you were proud of me earning my yellow belt in Kai-rah-tay!

GUY: Well, of course, but do you have to wear it with every outfit?!?!

“Just as funny as what I wrote on the wall of the ladies room at your office about you wearing my bra.”

Wait, I have more a lot more and it isn’t an April fool joke!

“You can lose a few pounds by doing a breast reduction.”

I also have one about your age.

You know, that dress makes your butt look HUGE!

But can he take a joke about his wait?

“All I said was that your boobs are nice and large. I thought that was allowed.”

It’s not funny when she’s on top and crushing you….

Welllll, maybe a bit funny.

But my dear I joked that you had given birth to two babies and still fit into your wedding dress, but I have not been able to fit into my suit in over a year.

No flag this time, John? I’m really liking that you’re doing it…

Wanna get a slap? “You don’t sweat much for a fat girl.”