Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for May 14, 2022

Whatever went CRASH!, it wasn’t the Garfield phone!

Awww…the people ordered a belly warmer again.

http://www.breakingcatnews.com/comic/the-people-ordered-a-belly-warmer/

The only food I can think of that would benefit from being weighed down by many cats is the shooter’s sandwich: fill a hollowed out loaf of bread with cooked steak, and sauteed mushrooms-onions-shallots-herbs. Wrap the loaf tightly with foil and cover with heavy weights overnight. And now my tummy is grumbling …

A large pepperoni pizza? Ordered on a Garfield phone? Can it get any better?

(I mean, lasagna, I suppose, but not many places deliver lasagna and personally, I like pizza better.)

Pizza! Yaaay!!

I think they need more than one pizza at this time in their lives.

What, no “meat feast”?

O.T. – hi, Lalybarger. When you have a chance would you please email me at gloria.fleming@ymail.com for a private chat? Thanks.

Cats think all food is theirs.

O.T. is LadyKat okay? I haven’t seen a post lately. I went back as far as the 6th and didn’t see anything. Is she at the cabin?? Hoping all is well!

A Garfield phone with a cord! I haven’t seen one of those in many a year!

Meanwhile, Back on the Nile

Beatrixia: Here we are at the Oasis near Afar. It’s going to be midnight soon. According to the scroll, we should be able to see the entrance to the pyramid then.

Vann: It’s been a long day. Kara and I are going to bed down for the night if you don’t mind.

Beatrixia: That’s fine.

Puckmosis: Oh look, there’s a cactus over there.

Cactus: Hi there. My name’s Muld-Hour. You can call me Muldy.

Puckmosis: How is it you’re here? I didn’t think there were any cacti in this desert.

Muldy: With the Cosmo Nursery, anything goes.

Violet-Ifa: Can you give us directions to the pyramid?

Muldy: Oh sure. See where the moonlight hits that ridge? The pyramid’s right over there.

Sometime Later

Lupinium: There’s the entrance. Let’s go!

Puckmosis: Not so fast. I think we should check out the hieroglyphs above the entrance. Vi, can you translate?

Violet-Ifa: Yes. They say “Joy and Peace to all who enter here.”

Puckmosis: We should proceed with caution. Look, there are some more hieroglyphs above that room. What do they say?

Vi: They say, “There are no strangers. Just friends we have yet to meet.”

I see Puck is a pizza fanatic, that would make him quite welcome in my house! Make mine a pepperoni and mushroom with extra cheese though with my Vegan daughter back from FSU I will probably get something from one of the handful of vegan shops that have sprouted up around nearby USF and go with something that has dairy free cheese, Portobello mushrooms and a variety of pepper and onions….. Pizza and a cold cerveza sounds like a good Saturday lunch!

The Perfect Pizza: Deep Dish, with Red Onions, Green Peppers, Black Olives, Pork Sausage, Bacon, and extra cheese.

Yes, a veritable feast of doom for my entire cardiovascular system. I can feel the nitrate-laced bacon already at work, and the Sausage? Oh, don’t get me started about the sausage…with their tiny globules of fat clogging my heart, the anterior and posterior interventricular veins don’t stand a chance…Bwa hahaha.

I intend to wash this culinary apocalypse down with a Samuel Adams Boston Lager; after all, my liver deserves to be in on the fun.

As a courtesy, I have a clif-notes edition of my last will and testament pinned to my shirt for quick disposition of the body. I am leaving my buoyant, devil-may-care attitude to the Orb. I would like Robin to provide the eulogy and Scaeva to initiate the Klingon Death Scream. Qapla’

Prepare for a battle, Woman. You have three determined cats and only two hands. Someone’s getting on that belly warmer. The only solution: Eat all the pizza. It’s a tough task, better see if there are volunteers.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is Pizza Number Five

One, two, three, four, five

Everybody in the car, and come on, let’s ride

To the pizza shop around the corner

The doc says eat kale and drink prune juice

But I really don’t wanna

Because I had those last week

I gotta coupon so food is cheap

I like asiago, bacon, sausage, no pita

And as I continue you know I’m a diet cheater

So what can I do? I really beg you, my Cat

To me is eating it’s just like sport, anything fly

It’s all good, let me dump it, please send in the crumpets

A little bit of anchovy in my life

A little bit of radamer by my side

A little bit of feta is all I need

A little bit of cheddar is what I see

A little bit of sausage in the sun

A little bit of bacon all night long

A little bit of sweet gouda, here I am

A little bit of everything is the plan

- Damaso Perez Prado / Lou Bega / Zippy Davids – Mambo No. 5 (A Little Bit Of…)

OT: Sad

Man, some Saturdays are just so what I need. Yesterday the fire alarm at my school malfunctioned, and when the whole school was outside a downpour started. I don’t have superstitions, but that was helluva Friday the 13th…

Like the telephone.

\\//_

PIZZA!!!!!!

Ok, so the arc wasn’t over with yesterdays strip. And we’re back to a few months ago with pizza disscussion. Remember folks, a pizza turns out to really be mostly fruit.

Oh, yeah! Let’s hear it for pizza!

As long as the G******* phone is being used ironically it’s OK.

The Beatles: A Hard Day’s Night

It’s been a hard day’s nap,

And I am hungry as a dog

It’s been a hard day’s nap

I’ve just been sleeping like a log

So I must pick up the phone

And order sent to my home a pepperoni pizza!

…….

You know I traveled yesterday

And found the cats have all behaved (or so they would have me believe)

And there is no sense in my cooking a meal

When I know just what we all crave

So now I pick up the phone

I don’t need to leave my home

A pizza is on the way!

…….

We’re all home

And pepperoni pizza’s just fine,

A nice box,

And a nice warm place is all mine! Mine!

…….

It’s been a hard day’s nap,

And I am hungry as a dog

It’s been a hard day’s nap

I’ve just been sleeping like a log

So I must pick up the phone

And order sent to my home a pepperoni pizza!

You know it’s all alright!

You know it’s all alright!

Very hard to find proper pizza these days. Most of the “popular” ones, thick or thin crust, are overwhelmed with mozzarella cheese, don’t have enough Parmesan and Romano cheeses, and don’t have enough sauce. The proportion of cheese to sauce is critical—too much of either ruins the balance of flavors. While I’ve had some reasonably good thick crust or deep dish pizza, I think it was invented because it’s too hard to make a good thin crust. Thick crust is basically bread dough with pizza toppings—three or four times the carbs, too.

Best pizza I’ve ever had was not in New York or Chicago: Pagliai’s in Iowa City, Iowa. I wish I knew where they get their pepperoni.

Based on real life! https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=402665075005447&set=pb.100057858737451.-2207520000..&type=3

Pucky what? Hey, cats ain’t no bears.

Elvis: “If you really loved us you’d order anchovy pizza.”

If I still had a landline, I would totally get that Garfield phone!

Oh my goodness, Georgia, a landline pizza order? :) I don’t think we’ve ordered delivery in years unless they have an online site! LOL! We make an exception for Chinese, because the place we get it is also a pub (like a lot of takeway/delivery here in mining town Western Australia) and they don’t have the tech. Yet!

Some lovely people, at the start of the pandemic, started a web site for delivery, takeout and dine in for town restaurants and it’s still going strong :)

I keep thinking it must have been a hell of an overnighter if the return involves naps and pizza delivery. Plus, wow, the people have no idea how much fun the cats enjoyed while the humans were away.

OT: Breaking Mews from TinyKittens

Coming from a big family, sometimes I forget that some people really can order just one pizza—especially when their two kids are little.

No specially designed “pizza box stand” can keep the cheese from sticking to the lid when a cat is warming himself on the box. More research is required. :)