Herman by Jim Unger for June 10, 2022

When I roll over at night, my body makes noise.

bum bum, ting

he must be living in my neighborhood

Oddly enough, so do my neighbors.

Try a mask and ear plugs. And, oh yeah, lying down.

He better talk to the rest of the band.

Bang the drum slowly, then!

A one man band!

An annoying tune is stuck in his head.

Don’t see too many of those nowadays

Get rid of the accordion.

No bagpipes, so it’s all OK!

I suggest a little soft music before bedtime.

Stop serenading yourself to sleep…

That’s the problem with being a one-man-band… no roadie!

“Don’t sleep on your back.”

Well, you’ll just have to stop taking your work to bed with you.

Try rolling over on the other side!

If you sleep on a mattress instead of a accordion and a base drum you might sleep.

I wonder if any other one man bands have that problem. (If it was an organ grinder, the monkey would also have trouble sleeping.)

Just keep the accordion.

I would too, if all my neighbors were yelling at me all night.