Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for December 23, 2022

Just ignore them, Danae. They’re just stinky, booger-brained boys.

Is this like A Christmas Carol? Will she be visited by other elf spirits?

De Niro and Pesci?

Anybody else remember lead tinsel?

Elf Thugs !

“Nice little room ya got here. Be a shame if somethin’ was to…happen to it.”

The Elf Mafia

If she isn’t careful, she’ll wake up with Lucy’s head in her bed.

Well, some of us were curious about Santa’s Cyber-security thugs yesterday – and Wiley delivered.

Always thought this interesting about “ax”/“axed”: “The celebrated Middle English writer Geoffrey Chaucer, who penned The Canterbury Tales and is often called ‘the father of English literature,’ used the word this way; so did the Coverdale Bible, which was the first-ever English incarnation of the Bible… The president of the American Dialect Society says that ‘ax’ is ‘not a new thing; it is not a mistake. It is a feature of regular English.’"

Uh oh, the big guy sent Vito and Bruno, Danae must really be on the coal delivery list.

Ah, a ‘little’ Damon Runyon today.

Where’s the snowflake outrage for negative ethnic stereotyping? Goombah Lives Matter!

Reminds me of one the first Kate strips. spoilers She was having a financial meeting with her Barbies and they voted to get rid of ken to reduce the clothes budget. Danae now has living dolls.

OMG, thanks, Wiley, this is hilarious!

I’m thinking a little Krampus might be in order here.

And of course, she loves them.

Puts me in mind of two of my favorite seasonal books. The Fat Man; A Tale of North Pole Noir by Ken Harmon, and The Stupidest Angel by Christopher Moore. Both are hilarious satiric sendups of the season.

This is a colorized recycling of one that ran in 2002 — specifically, this was the strip for December 24th. GoComics seems to have left out the strip that originally ran on the 23rd, when Joe commented that Danae trying to hack Santa’s database explained “why elf thugs are knocking down our front door” and Kate said cheerfully, “Oh, aren’t they the most brutishly cute things you ever saw?”

Lines like that remind us that Kate is evil, too; she’s merely more devious about it than her sister is.

“You’re cute too, it’s too bad we gotta rub ya out”

I love the “accents”!

Those elves are so cute!

Thanks Wiley this was quite a joy this morning.

Time to call the police and report that two thugs with weird mustaches are in bed with a small girl.

Tinsel. It’s not just for decoration.

No, no, NOT the stale candy cane – oh, the inhumanity …

ahem…just a, mmm, woid: The correct pronunciation is “wich”, e.g., “wich youse”, as in Vinnie Antonelli in “My Blue Heaven”: “…When I say I’m wich you, I mean I’m. Wich. You.” Just sayin’…. And no, I wouldn’t mess with those guys. Have you ever seen the havoc a wet, sticky candy cane can wreak?