That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for December 30, 2022

The 2 teachers couldn’t believe that the winter break was almost over and neither one of them had hooked up with anyone at Club Med.

“Do you ever wish you could travel to somewhere exotic, like Moose Jaw Saskatchewan?”

do you think this bathing suit shows toomuch skin?

/// Love in Idleness seems a bit boring,

languid women adored and adoring.

Their men aren’t out warring,

or exploring, or whorîng.

Lovin’ idleness, both men are snoring.

When Tadema paints a relief/

His mastery beggars belief-/

But his maidens are chaste/

And not to my taste-/

The nude is Bill Bouguereau’s fief !

Here, two ladies of Ancient Rome/

Have gathered in one of them’s home/

Where they plan to meet later/

A large gladiator/

With a beat like a metronome…///

Does that little Dutch boy still have his finger in the diyke?

“Caligula asked me to marry him. But I don’t know … he seems to think more of his horse than he does of me.”

“Oh, Capri is a nice enough place, I suppose. But everything here is so overdone. I asked Tiberius for a simple birthday party … and as usual he went all-out Orgy! Well, I didn’t ‘have a thing to wear’ anyway.”

This is the pits. Everyone’s left. Getting undressed together and frolicking isn’t the same without an audience.

“Sheesh…every time I finally get comfortable, the sound of that fountain makes me want to pee.”

No, that’s the fountain. The big one behind you is the ocean but have another wine and try again

How do you think they got the blue water back there to come out clear in our fountain?

I’ll say one thing Ester….for my money I’d just as soon gone to Blackpool again this year. At least they’ve got good fish n’ chips there!

“Pompei is usually so dull this time of year, but I’ve just got a feeling that things are gonna really explode any minute now!”

“I don’t think I’ve ever been this bored.”

Is this what they call “going Dutch”?

“Well, here we are in Actium. When is that fun battle supposed to start, again?”

How would they know that Christ would be born in 26 years?

“So what is ‘B.C.’ anyway, and why are we counting down towards it?”

“I dunno. ‘Baked Crackers’?”

That “Nile Red Kush” must be pretty strong … you’ve been staring at that fountain lined up behind the hookah pipe for ages!

“I wish the lavatory was closer. As soon as I sit down next to that fountain I have to get up again.”

That’s when Marty took the check book away…

poetry rings true in my heart

gives me indigestion and I f@&t…

So Marty takes the check book away…

Love in Idleness: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Lawrence_Alma-Tadema_-_Love_in_Idleness.jpg 

has info and links that point to more info about this painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3053 (December 30, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to the blog entry with my comments pointing to info about this artist that I used to point to here. So far, 18 works by this artist have been used here (19 times total, including a repeat). The March 9, 2022, strip has the prior.

it’s about time Michael comes out for his bath, i can hardly wait.

Beginning aerobics …

Oh. Hello. I see you wanted to get to the New Year’s Eve party early also!

Hmmmmm, perhaps the ladies like each other more than a gladiator?

What ho! What ho ! What dames are these/

Who loll before yon marble frieze/

And sip Falernian from a cup/

Whilst waiting for the morning shtupp ?///

Upon the terrace by the sea/

(This may- or may not- be Capri)/

They linger, lulled by luxury/

In one dead Dutchman’s fantasy..///

Tadema had a certain flair/

For seeing things that weren’t there/

He leaves us even more aware/

That life, in fact, was never fair.

A painter, now called “Anglo-Dutch”/

Enables us to (briefly) clutch/

A world beside cerulean seas/

With pseudo-Romans such as these./

Tadema asks us: can we, please,/

Ignore this simple fact: these brats/

Are both British aristocrats.

Twas the last of December- the end of the year:/

I awoke to discover that “Dang-I’m still here!”/

I sprang from my cot with a fierce need to pee/

(Ignoring the creak of my gamey left knee)/

I got to the pot with scant seconds to spare/

And, passing the mirror, endured quite a scare…/

The figure reflected therein was a blur/

(I’d forgotten my spectacles- wherever they were)/

When I donned them at last, I saw to my chagrin/

That a stubble of white had appeared on my chin…/

But I hadn’t a moment to deal with that stubble-/

If I don’t take ten pills and five shots I’m in trouble..//

As I gulped down my pills with a gallon of water/

I heard the phone ring , and I knew ‘twas my daughter!/

( I never get calls from my two sturdy sons -/

They carry my name, but the girls are the ones/

Who, when trouble arises, are sure to appear)/

And the point of her call was a “Happy New Year !”:

“And how are you doing?” She sweetly inquired/

Unlike the two louts whom I also have sired,)/

“Got the world on a string!” Was my jaunty reply./

“I’m bound for the gym!” (Where I’ll probably die..)/

She blew me some kisses and went on her way-

And I wrote this for y’all who endure me each day./

I look forward to seeing each one of you here/

Beginning on Monday- so Happy New Year !

I’m bored also….we just never have any fun.

Happy almost-New Year, whoever is hanging around on this site. And cheer up, Sarah Longwell is on the job (Republican Accountability Project)!

Happy New Year to all !