That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for February 07, 2023

/// Gjerta crosses her arms, looking jaded.

Priska pleads, but the crone’s not persuaded.

Priska’s booked on a flight;

the witch takes off tonight.

Gjerta: “No, your broom can’t be upgraded.”

“The whist and cribbage clubs are uprising against the bridge club. Whose side are you on?”

Gladys regrets not having installed a Ring Doorbell every time Horton’s dropped over…

Here’s a little known fact thatijustmadeup: The original title for this painting was “The Yakkety Sex,” but Carl Bloch’s granny (who posed as model) took him by the ear and made him change it!

Many years later, Boots Randolph was inspired by the story and recorded his now-famous saxophone piece. The rest is histrionics …

Boots Randolph, on YouTube:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5UoUfGImIUc

“Yakety Sax,” Wikipedia:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yakety_Sax

“I’m not one to gossip, but (have you got a few hours?)…”

“Old Sven went to that pharmacist quack

And bought some aphrodisiac.

He hired the barmaid with the big bazoom

And took her to the tavern’s upstairs room.

For hours they were heard up there

Ecstatic shouts — and then despair —

Having fought his last bedroom bout,

The old fool’s cheating heart gave out.

Oh, Greta, it was such a disgrace

To see that last huge smile on his face!

His wake is arranged tomorrow eventide,

But since his death’s ruled a suicide.

No Christian service for him’s allowed …

Let’s go early and beat the crowd!”

One of the stars of “Eighty for Brady” is Jane Fonda. Nothing she ever says or does can make up for her treason during the Vietnam War.

Isn’t this a “throwback?”

Margaret….You need to come see this. There’s this guy….I think his name’s “Ishmael”….and he’s threatening everyone with a baseball bat. Keeps yelling “I want to be reinstated”??? or something that. Anyway, they say he’s been on a binge for nearly two weeks and can hardly walk except he’s so angry he keeps breaking windows and smashing chairs. Come quick before we miss him getting arrested and thrown in the drunk tank.

Two dames of a certain age/

are seething with silent rage/

they’ve recently learned/

that their children have “turned”!/

Their gay teacher belongs in a cage !///

That person is clearly ill suited/

To the school as it’s now constituted/

the danger is great/

that the kids won’t stay straight!/

we can see that they’re being recruited !///

You buy’in the tub of popcorn?

“I’m begging you! Please take your husband back!”

The hideous prospect now loomed/

That whole generation’s been “groomed”!/

O, what is the use/

If they don’t reproduce?/

The nation is certainly doomed!

From: @Call me Ishmael

https://www.gocomics.com/profile/2288699

~

Two dames of a certain age/

are seething with silent rage/

they’ve recently learned/

that their children have “turned”!/

Their gay teacher belongs in a cage !///

That person is clearly ill suited/

To the school as it’s now constituted/

the danger is great/

that the kids won’t stay straight!/

we can see that they’re being recruited !///

…and this is the part you won’t believe, not only are these Kardashians stupid but their butts are twice the size of ours!

No no, it’s true. I saw it with my own two eyes. Wilma’s son went into the city and brought her back one of these newfangled washboards. It has cut her laundry time in half!"

" Gerta, you gotta believe me. It was dark, I’d had a few drinks, and I was horny … I didn’t know it was your husband! "

“Now we’re not ones to go ‘round spreading rumors. / No, really we’re just not the gossiping kind. / Oh you’ll never hear one of us repeating gossip. / So you’d better be sure and listen close the first time!” The Hee-Haw Honeys, Hee-Haw: CBS 1969-1971 (first run); then (and now) in perpetual syndication re-runs.

We have to try the new hot club in town. You show your +i+s at the door and you’re in.

Oh Hilda, I am at my wits end Bjorn wants sex everyday!

“You did it with the lantern on? You’re perverted, Magatha!”

“Yes, really. I swear to Oden, it was this big!”

I’m afraidy, no more Brady…

Two women talking: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Traditional clothing of Denmark in art" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, and Ecosia search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found, and once there find the text string koner, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3075 (February 7, 2023) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I’ve added a comment there pointing to the blog entry with my comments pointing to artist info I used to point to here. So far, 6 works by this artist have been used here, the February 22, 2022, strip bring the prior.

“I tell you, the HOA says we can’t park our brooms out front like that! You’re going to be fined!”

I tell you it’s the latest thing! You need to get on this “bitcoin” thing too!

You’ve probably never seen/

A mohel with a practice marine/

But foreskins may be found

On both sea and dry ground/

In the “head” and in the latrine..///

All agree that a circumcision/

Is a task that requires precision/

If the cut is too deep/

The poor victim will reap/

A lifetime of endless derision..///

The pitch and the roll of a ship/

May cause an unfortunate slip/

Of the razor sharp blade/

And mistakes may be made/

Removing far more than the tip!///

All hail to the maritime mohel/

And his supertesticular toil/

May his praises be sung/

By the old and the young/

When he exits this “mortal coil”!