Looks Good on Paper by Dan Collins for May 27, 2023

This one gave me a big chuckle.

Not bad….

Who’s driving?

I laughed my a*s off at this one.

And you can’t lie

Asstronomy joke

The lady following is dismayed. She’s used to nicer butts.

Unappealing

He’s deeply in love with her. He couldn’t offer her the sun, but he gave her the moon.

That windshield’s got a crack in it.

She was going to church, poor Gertrude was traumatized. She never closed her eyes again

Dan Collins has been funny in the past. I’m going to delay removing him from my list.

Better than a bumper sticker that says Stop tailgating, a$$hole.

If you live in an area code where you are required to dial all 10 digits of your number (area code plus your local number) even for local calls, you never have to dial the leading 1. The 1 originally told the system that you were dialing a long distance number, so the system knew many digits expect. Now, since all calls are routed by the same equipment, dialing a leading 1 is irrelevant, the system just throws it out. So don’t say “1-800” just say “800”.

She might have a dash cam catching the license number along with the BIG ‘event’.

Attention Universe! Bite me.