Monty by Jim Meddick for July 10, 2023

It’s not paranoia if they’re really out to get you

You can only go up from here.

Post hoc propter hoc

The Beach Gods are fickle.

The hot air is now in the beach ball.

Leaving the house without an umbrella always works for me.

Well, at least the beach shouldn’t be crowded.

Most can make it rain just by lighting the charcoal grill.

Did Monty hit the Carwash this morning?

I take the car to the wash-don’t put any money in, just wait a few minutes.

I can stop a rain forecast by putting down grass seed.

cause and effect

Those adjustable pants are just bad luck. Zip ’em back on, Monty! :)

Why would you inflate the beach ball at home before getting in the car? It’d be so much easier to carry deflated, and then blow it up when you get settled on the sand!

Why didn’t he do that inside the house or the car?

“It worked!”

It’s that Monty person down the block, Young Master. He seems to have jinxed the weather again! Shall I have Humberto run him off? Here’s your umbrella, sir….