Shoe by Gary Brookins and Susie MacNelly for August 24, 2023

Yeah, my wife liked him also. I used to call him, “Wayne Newberg”.

Newton was great in Vegas Vacation.

That’s FUNNY!

I liked him when he guest stared on Bonanza.

He guested on Married with Children. You could say Peggy was “enamored” of him.

Danke Schoen (Schön)

Just saw that he is coming to a casino in Western New York. Well, it is either him or an animated wax figurine.

I have never noticed his desk is a trashcan.

Just bury them with her!

Yesterday I was listening to a countdown from the 60s. A song came on and I figured it was someone pretending to be Marlene Dietrich. Nope. It was Wayne. My mother never listened to him and the oldies stations I listened to before Sirius never played him so it wasn’t until this year that I found out he sounds like a lady. I do not get the appeal. The album covers from back then don’t really do him any favors either.

I saw a bit on him decades ago on maybe 60 Minutes and he flew his own helicopter to work in Vegas

“I’ll pay you $5 apiece to take them away!”

I had a temp job with a classified ads department. One time the Obits line was backed up and a call was diverted to me. Lady wanted to complain that the obit had a one-letter typo. No big deal? It was supposed to read, “He has now gone to his heavenly home” but the “w” had been changed to a “t.” You might be able to imagine my efforts to maintain my composure and express deep regret and sorrow before transferring the call back to obits.

Priceless

I wonder if Wayne Newton is related to Fig Newton? Nah, couldn’t be. (Sorry, I could not resist.)

My wife has a bunch of Elvis records stored in a closet…

It could have been worse. They could have been Slim Whitman records.

Just bring ’em to the dump…altho they might not take ’em either…

Is there anything else I can do for you? No, that’s it. Danke schoen!

Mr. Las Vegas’ home in Las Vegas is literally a whole city block with a heliport. I think he tried to sell it a few years ago but no takers. No I don’t care for his music either.

Funny, I can’t remember one Wayne Newton song at the moment.

probably easier just to build a fire and burn them…

when i was 12 i made my parents take me to see Jack Benny live and he had his whole tv show cast with him, including Mel Blanc, but Wayne Newton was his musical guest

Free to a good home. Or any home. Just please take them