Strange Brew by John Deering for November 29, 2023

Almost surely, fire was first stolen from (forest fire / the gods) and kept going as a sacred duty for … millennia … before anybody figured out how to start a fire from scratch (or stick rubbing, or stick spinning or even pumping a plunger in a bamboo joint, so I’ve heard).

If your life is usually boring, and you live in prehistoric ties, you’ll just eventually stumble into accidently running two sticks together.,

I was trying to decide which one to use to bonk you on the head.

“Those little green guys got tired of seeing us eat raw meat, and violated something called a “Non-Interference Directive.” By the way, they are delicious roasted — here, try some.”

“Just nervous energy I guess. Let’s try jamming your ugly freakin’ face in it now, smart a$$.”

God.

Oh, I was just thinking of something else. I didn’t do it on purpose.

Friction fire, an immensely impactful invention.

“I thought I had invented the drill. But it turns out wood won’t make holes in wood”

I had “Uptown Funk” going through my head.

This is a funny comic but it is also a question that most people have (ir if they are the least bit curious) should have asked about the origin if “things”. Thanks again Mr. Deering for funny with a message!

And that’s the report, live from Flint and now back to the studio.

Do trees in the forest, that have crossed branches that rub together, set themselves alight?

Which brings to mind, who discovered that nitroglycerin was good medicine for a heart attack and why?

“We’ll be saying a big hello to all intelligent lifeforms everywhere, and to everyone else out there, the secret is to bang the rocks together, guys.”

THis was the big reason that most boys never became Eagle Scouts.

Music?

Casava roots need to be processed in a specific way or they will produce cyanide and kill you. If you get it almost right you, after a few weeks of a steady diet of it, get a paralytic disease. If you get it just right, you get tapioca.

When I first read this as a kid all I could think was; “How many people died to figure that out and why did they keep trying?”.

What are you doing up so early, man?

After he invented the wheel, he wondered what would happen if he turned a stick around and around?

We’d all still be freezing if it wasn’t for the obsessive compulsives.

He got tired of beating himself on the head with a rock, so he thought he’d try something different.