That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for January 05, 2024

Franz took a Konzertpause to drink a beer. Then he took another Konzertpause to get rid of the beer.

Where are all my favorite commenters?? It’s lonely here!

“All right, all right…so I need a little liquid assistance to get through this modern Stravinsky dreck. So sue me!”

“There’s gotta be a way to turn this thing into a beer bong.”

Ever seen a one eared elephant?

“One of these I suck on and one I blow, but I’m too drunk to remember which.”

Bassoons were the first receptacle for those “Yard Of Beer” glasses that were blessedly briefly popular years ago.

What appears to be a turned out empty pocket says a lot.

“ Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?”

Lester contemplating how his life had ended up like this: Divorced, no money, and playing bassoon for drinking money at age 80.

/// He knows playing wrong notes means dismissal.

Yet, suggest that he’s drunk and he’ll bristle.

Osyp plays the bassoon

and, to “keep it in tune,”

he insists he must first wet his whistle.

The musician is contemplating if he’s had enough to drink: There is a sweet spot where you are just sloshed enough so that the music flows like honey from your instrument.

Too little and it sounds stilted, and too much and nobody can tell what the f* you’re playing (it all sounds like an elephant getting it on)

The very moment the idea for the straw came about.

Concert break: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Undated paintings" Wikimedia 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, Ecosia and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found and once there find the text string Kern, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting. 

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3247 (January 5, 2024) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger, if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. Only work by him used here so far.

https://councilofcanadianbassoonists.Ca/project/bassoonists-in-the-art-of-hermann-armin-von-kern-jesseread/

“Hermann Armin von Kern (14 March 1838 – 18 January 1912) was an academic painter, one of the most popular Austrian genre painters of his time who worked at the court of Franz Josef I in Vienna. Being a very good pianist he often made music with his friend, the composer Franz Liszt (1811 – 1886). He trained in Prague, Vienna and Munich. A very prolific artist, working primarily in oils, Kern specialized in characters, settings, professions, and scenes of local activity.”

“I DON’T KNOW OF ANY OTHER PROMINENT ARTIST WHO DID SO MANY WORKS SHOWING THE BASSOON.”

“In all of the paintings, the bassoon is similar, and perhaps he had a good friend who was a bassoonist.  The instrument is of the Viennese flared bell type as shown in the examples below.  Often the bell was made of metal, not unlike a trumpet or horn bell.”

“Sorry, Officer, all I know is that he came running up to me, handed me these, and rushed off out the door faster than you can swig a beer!”

“Oboe, oboe, oboe, am I in a pickle!”

Fritz knew from years of experience that to play the bassoon, one must be well-lubricated. In fact, Ein Fagott und ein Bier, das eine kann man nicht ohne das andere spielen.

Jackson thought that by adding beer to bassoon he will get double the sucking pleasure.

Hold on, I need to moisten my reed and wet my whistle. Ah Ha! Win- win. Two-fer!

Old Hellmuth is known to dote/

upon his beloved fagott-/

But be ready to buy/

Because when he is dry/

For some reason, he can’t play a note !

Trial #142 to see what whistle should be sounded at the end of a work day.

I’ll be with you for the second movement; right now I need to run to the art supplier—there’s a sale on economy size Burnt Sienna.

As a bassoonist (and contrabassoonist) I am getting a kick.

“This isn’t my beer! I must have grabbed that other guy’s drink. But, what the heck IS it”?

Liftshytz wasted four pints of Heinekin discerning the volume of an irregular shape rather than utilize the nonsense Sir Isaac Newton was spewing.

“I’m just cosplaying, a weekend hobby of mine. I’m actually an upstanding member of the high financial institute community.”

That look. I recognize that look so well. It’s that look I have when I’ve drank all the beer in the fridge, and the last of the growler is in my glass. It’s that look I have….praying for it to last.

Fujarista trying to reproduce the sound of his preferred instrument on a bassoon.

Seems to be overcompensating.

Monday:

Androgyny run amuck !

Any kiddies will be outta luck-

They will suffer indeed/

When they’re looking to feed/

And they can’t find a place to suck..