Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for January 20, 2024

Those machines are LOUD. After one trip inside one, I asked if the noise centers around whatever body part is being imaged. They said it does. They were looking at my head. To no one’s surprise, they found nothing.

I hope they remembered to take the dog collar off.

Being accompanied with a feline would have been more appropriate for a cat scan.

For me the worst part was holding your breath.

I was being checked for blood clots in the lungs, and could barely breath to begin with.

My wife says it’s kind of being inside a timpani (although she’s so relaxed about it that she has trouble staying awake).

You’d have to be extremely thin to be able to have even a small dog beside you in those machines. They aren’t much fun for the claustrophobic.

I was quite claustrophobic the first tim. They gave me head phones and played “The Shoop Shoop Song (It’s in His Kiss) – Cher”. Helped a lot because the only time I saw “Mermaids” was on a trip by boat to UK. The cinema was in the front of the ship and the engines were pretty loud. We could hardly hear the film. The engine sounded a lot like the NMRI so I just imagined I was still in this cinema instead of the NMRI.

I’ve had several MRIs over the years and found that when music is offered it definitely helps. Also, some places offer something to cover your eyes so you’re not tempted to open them and see how close your face is to the “tube”. I then try to picture the open sky and I can relax a little more.

That’s a pretty big opening. They must have borrowed their MRI machine from an NFL team. Actually, the hospital I use most has an extra large MRI machine. But it’s not for athletes, it’s because they see so many obese patients. (Unfortunately for people like me, they still have the ones that have less room than a coffin.) There are also even larger machines for zoos and some animal sanctuaries.

Last MRI I had I told them to put me under. I couldn’t have an open MRI because of pacemaker .

LMAO!

At first I thought it was a crematorium, and thought… a little morbid, but funny.

This is closer to truth than it should be. The dog must go everywhere.

trust me, the dog would not have fit beside him – not even a chihua-hua (with thanks to Les Nessman)

Are dogs allowed in the CATscan?

The hard part was getting him to stay still. His little tail was wagging to beat the band!

The dog is much more comfortable with the PET scan than the CAT scan.

Oh no! They’ll come out fused…

Boy, when I did that there certainly wasn’t room for a dog. There wasn’t really room for me! It was claustrophobic. They had a mirror set up so that you could see light out the end of the tunnel, to help with the claustrophobia.

No, I didn’t find out it was the light of a train coming into the tunnel!

I can’t have an MRI because I have a femur nail, or pin, in my leg. The Magnet would rip the nail out of my leg and take some my leg with it.

I hope they give the Doctor reviewing the MRI results a heads up on the dog, or he is going to be very confused.

Why would he have a deaf dog? No dog is going to put up with those sound levels.

I’ve never had that much room in any of the one’s I’ve been in.

I barely fit into those things, so, nice thought that it is, I doubt the dog would fit, too! For me, they have to grease the sides to slide me in, and have me attached to a tow cable, to get me back out.