The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for March 16, 2024

Hoe No!

You’re about to be mulched!!!

“Jolly – Ho, Ho, Ho – Green Giant.”

Was the Green Giant calling for a Hoe? The visitor is carrying one.

A not so good thing from the garden of the Green Giant!

Is that death visiting the Jolly Green Giant?…How would a Hoe work on him?

Death has come to reap the seeds he sowed.

“You got to cross that lonesome Valley/ You got to cross it by yourself …”

Hoe hoe hoe!

If the Grim Reaper brought glyphosate instead of that hoe, the Jolly Green Giant would be headed for his last Roundup™.

Hey Jolly Green, if you keep you peas in the freezer, DO NOT tell Alabama!

Gonna have to kneecap him!!

This Giant task would more easily and be better accomplished by a three-reaper team (each one with his own hoe):

Three reapers could “Hoe Hoe Hoe.”

Actually, later in life the Green Giant gave up farming and became a Tailor. Now he shall reap what he hath sewn. (Bah-dum Tsssh)

Does the Reaper have a Black Thumb?

In the valley of the ho ho ho, Grim Reaper

Ho, ho, ho…

The Green Reaper.

Time for a Hoe Down.

Giant Mr. Green, your ho has arrived and wants her fee up front.

The Grim Hoer???

♪ Hoe Soul a Mio ♪

It’s BEAN a while, and now is the time to prune down the garden. Come with me.

Take him out at the knees!

Your first soil amendment is to Loam liberally, and the pursuit of compost.

I’ve seen better looking hoers.

Ho! Ho! Ho!

The Valley of the Jolly Green Giant is in Minnesota, where a lot of people — including the big guy and his sidekick, Little Sprout — speak with a Norwegian accent. This led to an unfortunate misunderstanding, resulting in a morals charge, when he was overheard to say he wanted to play with the Green Boy Pėckers.

We’re gonna need a bigger hoe!

He’s headed for a hoe down.

“Bring me a shrubbery,”

Perfect height to harvest some berries!

*sings The valley of the jolly Hoe hoe hoe! Grim Reaper!

Should have brought the scythe to cut him down to size.

bet the big guy’s not so jolly now… ☺