Monty by Jim Meddick for March 11, 2024

Have a sarsaparilla next time.

I didn’t know Fresca was even still available….

Not exactly a hard boiled detective.

Lemmy took his with Coca-Cola.

The doll walked in on a pair of legs from the floor right up to her, ahem! She could stop a fire truck during a 3 alarm blaze which is where my heart was going.

Shoo her in, Effie! (The Maltese Falcon)

I didn’t hear him enter, but my nostrils flared at the smell of his perfume… Pyramid Patchouli. There was only one joker in L.A. sensitive enough to wear that scent and I had to find out who he was.

a nod towards Robert Parker? “Monty for Hire”.

I doubt Monty know the difference between Maltese and Ford.

It’s also good with Tab.

“From 30 feet away she looked like a lot of class. From 10 feet away she looked like something made up to be seen from 30 feet away.”

If you like Fresca, drink Fresca, if you like whiskey, drink whiskey, but SIP it, don’t shoot it. Shooters are for people who want to get drunk, and sipping is for drinkers who enjoy a good whiskey.

I think Monty found his shall we say “Nitch”, a hard drinkin, unshaven, PI,Spade’s the name.

If it’s a test, let’s hope she passes.

Hope this is the start of an arc and he gets a case!

My co-worker kept a whiskey bottle in his bottom desk drawer. It was filled with ice tea, which he would swig all day long. Later was laid off, go figure.

Jack Daniels and Dr Pepper is my choice for a mixed drink. I call it a Dr Daniels.

…she walked into the office, legs that a guy would die for and lips that had kissed a lotta mugs goodbye. I said “Take a chair kid.” She took the oak chair with the red leather seat. Took it and walked back out my door. I was powerless to stop her. I had fallen for her, like a blind roofer….

Just watched “The Maltese Falcon” again yesterday in anticipation of the new Sam Spade series; can’t think of anything more opposite than Monty snooping.

He just needs to add grey-toned paint, like Phineas and Ferb did.

Sometimes Calvin is a private eye. “I have 5 shots in me, one lead, four bourbon…”

Bourbon and Fresca! Sounds about as appetizing as Scotch and Tang, or Gin and Scope.

Between the drinking and the routine head trauma, it was a wonder those old-time detectives solved any cases. :)

Take a shot every time the punchline is “Monty is unmanly”

I love Fresca. It’s the only soda I buy. As for ketchup on eggs, ugh. I just dislike ketchup, period. I use salsa on my eggs and eat my French fries without anything.

I want you to find my Velma.

He can be such a dick!

“I needed a drink, I needed a lot of life insurance, I needed a vacation, I needed a home in the country. What I had was a coat, a hat and a gun. I put them on and went out of the room.”

― Raymond Chandler, Farewell, My Lovely