Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for April 03, 2024

And your credit card is about to expire.

AND you haven’t renewed your auto’s warranty!!!

My portal password is totally random and has 42 characters (more or less). That’s about as strong as you can get short of 2FA.

Oh, we had a data security breech so all your personal data is on the dark web. So sorry. Here’s our solution; Change all your passwords, reinstall our app, use three levels of verification, call your bank, close your accounts, cancel your credit cards, call all the credit agencies and freeze your credit, change your name, get plastic surgery, change your gender, move.

Just remember; At Biggass Corporation (anLLC) your security is important to us……….

Riiighht…..

Nothing about a virus? Nurse, if I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

When it comes to passwords, I am reminded of the old joke about the two men who come across a bear in the woods. The first man stops to put on his running shoes. The second man says, “You’re crazy, you can’t outrun a bear!” The first man replies, “I don’t have to outrun the bear; I just have to outrun you.”

Unless your name is Bank of America, White House, IRS, NSA or some high-value target, hackers are not going to spend a lot of time trying to crack your password. They will move onto easier targets. This is part of a concept called, “Security through obscurity.”

A 6-character password can be cracked in milliseconds. Make it 10 characters long and the time goes up to about an hour. The average hacker isn’t going to waste an hour on every password. So don’t be low-hanging fruit.

P.S. Make the password 20 characters long and we’re talking trillions of years.

Would his lower portal password be different from the upper portal password? Being able to vocalize more with the upper one it has more choices than the PHHFFFFTTT! of the lower one.

IT guys always say that.

I hate my annual portal check.

My password on GoComics is weak. Will someone steal my list of favorites?

He was told his wife’s name is pretty and to just username.

If your portal password is weak, do you get portal hyPOtension?

He should definitely change it. “weak” is not a strong password at all

Uh, what’s a portal password? I handle router, Wi-Fi, VPN passwords and the like but what is this portal the IT guy is ranting about?

Better change it – you don’t want the doctor getting into your portal.

I bought a new phone yesterday, It’s an android so I had to change my GMAIL password.